


How Did We End Up Like This?

by sarcastissa



Series: How Did We End Up Like This: The Extensive Universe [1]
Category: Arrow (TV 2012), Batman - All Media Types, DC's Legends of Tomorrow (TV), DCU, Supergirl (TV 2015)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, BUT IN A FRIEND WAY, Best Friends, Break Up, Bruce and Felicity are friends, Dorks in Love, F/M, Falling In Love, Felicity Smoak has a type, Felicity is friends with everybody, Friends to Lovers, Friendship/Love, Getting Over Oliver Queen, Getting Together, Loving Yourself First, Moving Away, Moving On, Slow Burn, So many tropes, and now my main girl is moving on, being really in love with your friends, but also in a gay way, donezo, in a friend way, in the past, like they're totally broken up, not actually olicity, past olicity, smoak'd
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-16
Updated: 2016-10-18
Packaged: 2018-06-02 11:55:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 15
Words: 46,404
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6565156
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sarcastissa/pseuds/sarcastissa
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>For half of a decade, Felicity's best friend was a billionaire vigilante with a dark past. No, not that one. What started out as what Felicity insists was a mistake resulted in one of the longest friendship Felicity had ever had. Long distance, of course, because Bruce Wayne wasn't exactly keen on Star City and Felicity wasn't a fan of smog.</p><p>When Felicity and Oliver break up, Felicity doesn't want to give up on making a difference. So, she turns to her best friend, looking for comfort (which he fails at giving spectacularly) and understanding (which he wouldn't be able to stop even if he wanted to). She quickly finds herself fitting in with the Batman and his little army of children.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Prologue

**Author's Note:**

  * For [LaDemonessa](https://archiveofourown.org/users/LaDemonessa/gifts).



> Look, man, it was a plot bunny. Just a little one. I didn't feed it at all. Next thing I know? Boom. Multi-chapter story with plot and all that shit.
> 
> As much as I shipped Olicity, I think that the breakup might...it might be a good thing. I mean, it's better to have loved and let it change it you for the better, but the two of them should move on. I want to see a healthy breakup, dammit. I want Felicity to be happy.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> not an epilogue.
> 
> I'm not smart. :|

When Felicity was 20, she was a curious little fucker. It was a trait that she hadn’t ever really been able to grow out of, but as a kid, it was often a lot harder to get herself out of the situations that were more than little caused by her snooping.

To be fair, most of the time, said snooping was because of her thirst for justice. She wouldn’t deny that she was angry, and that anger had to lead somewhere. She used it to fuel her--her own resource renewable by simply thinking about her parents. She used her anger to dedicate herself to any mission she could find. She used it to focus her while she learned how to build computers, then how to code. She used it to get herself out of Las Vegas and into MI-fucking-T. She used her anger to prove everyone wrong, to prove that she’d amount to more than her mother and be better than her father.

Her anger often drove with her curiosity in the passenger seat of her motivation. She told herself it was that deadly pair that led her to digging through Wayne Enterprise’s servers. She told herself that was why she had accepted this “mission” from Cooper. If there was suspicious activity in WE, Felicity wanted to know. That was it. Purely selfish. She wasn’t some hacktivist like Cooper claimed to be, she just enjoyed a good search for answers.

The only answer she found was that Wayne Enterprises was surprisingly humane. Once begrudgingly reaching this conclusion--not even an executive using company money for hookers and blow, and wow, Felicity, how the fuck did you just think that while disappointed?--Felicity scrubbed the servers clean of her digital fingerprints and sent the synopsis to Coop. He wasn’t happy with it, obviously, but accepted it as fact. Once he realized that he did not have the same talent Felicity had for sneaking passed WE’s firewalls.

So, two months later whenever Gotham news spoke of a vigilante--a crazy person dressed as a fucking bat because the world liked to laugh at Gotham--Felicity couldn’t help herself. She hacked into the police department and started digging around in the case. And that was how she stumbled upon someone else’s hack. Honest to Bill Gates, she didn’t mean to find someone else’s tracking programs.

So, she maybe traced the program back. It was at this point that the whole “accidentally discovered who Batman was” sort of blurred into “didn’t exactly know she was going to discover who Batman was”. The point was, the coding was eerily familiar--codes were like fingerprints, the method in which one codes is usually unique to them--but she really didn’t pay any mind to that. She’d hacked a lot of people.

A lot.

There was a certain amount of familiarity that could be picked up from learning from a common source, so Felicity ignored the deja vu feeling until she got to the final firewall. The same fucking firewall that had taken her five straight hours of hounding while she investigated WE, but now equipped with extra defenses at the weak spots Felicity had previously exploited.

Well. Shit.

After doing a quick check--and yup, Bruce Wayne himself was responsible for WE’s “#1 in the business” digital security--Felicity may have had a brief panic attack.

But that didn’t necessarily mean anything, she told herself. Maybe Wayne was simply working with the Batman. She went to work wearing down the firewall, almost falling asleep on her keyboard before she finally--fucking, finally--cracked her way through. She sent out some digital crawlers to gather some data while she herself tried to track down the IP address. Wayne had been careful, she reflected to herself, and had rerouted his computer through about three hundred dummy IPs and satellites.

It was tedious work, but she got through it.

She wished that could’ve said she didn’t freak out whenever she traced the IP to Wayne Manor. She wished that she could say that she had mentally prepared herself for the knowledge. She did freak out, though. And she hadn’t prepared herself.

Fuck.

But then, she told herself, she could at least hope that this was just Wayne being curious. Surely, there was a chance she didn’t hack into whatever cave the Batman hid out in. That would mean that she’d fucked with the Batman. Twice.

And, honestly, if Bruce Wayne wasn’t the Batman, he would just sue her for fucking with him twice. That, that she could handle.

But after she and her crawlers had retreated and she’d started going through the files they’d copied, she’d figured out that the heavens had afforded her exactly no luck.

Son. Of. A. Bitch.

And while all of this was a shit storm, she quickly became caught up in Cooper and his idiocy. She loved him, but he’d completely fucked himself over. He was caught. He took the fall for her.

He died.

She changed.

So, she wasn’t really expecting to open the door to her dorm to find Bruce Wayne/the Batman looking down at her with an unreadable expression. She’d stayed up all night writing an essay and forcing herself not to cry, so the part of her brain not on a caffeine high was scrambling to make sense of the vigilante before her. It was, apparently, the other half of her brain that controlled her mouth, though.

“I had a bet with myself over whether or not you’d discover you’d been hacked and track me down to make me keep your secret.” Felicity gently reminded herself and the man in front of her that she held the cards of knowledge here. “I won.”

“I see that. You...weren’t who I was expecting, at the very least.” Bruce made the dig at her appearance--and hey, the panda shirt was cute as fuck, she’d fight someone. Not him, because, hello arm muscles the size of her thighs. She raised one eyebrow at his business suit sans tie.

“You’re one to talk. Not exactly the suit I was picturing.” Felicity stopped herself. “Not that- not that I was picturing this, I was just- I prepared myself, mentally.”

The corner of Bruce’s mouth ticked up into a slightly amused smirk. “I didn’t come here to threaten you, Ms. Smoak.”

“Felicity, please.” She looked him up and down before opening the door wider to invite him into the small living space in her dorm. She poured herself another cup of coffee and got an extra mug out for him, in case he wanted any. She poured plenty of cream and sugar into her mug, too, but figured that he was a ‘I like it as black as my soul’ kinda guy.

Whenever a startled laugh came from where Bruce was standing by her now closed door, she winced. “I said that out loud, didn’t I?”

“Yes.” He answered her and grabbed the pot to pour himself some. He also, curiously, detoured to the fridge to pour just a bit of creamer into his mug. Huh, so Batman isn’t as dark as he seems.

“Okay, so, as nice as this is, I’m sure there’s a reason to your visit aside from wanting a mug of the nicest coffee and college student budget can buy.” Felicity leaned against her counter, facing off with Gotham’s knight, who was tall as fuck. Seriously, like 6’ 4”. It was crazy.

Bruce smirked again and swallowed down some coffee which she knew was still scalding before putting his mug down on the counter and crossing his arms over his broad chest. “I want you to work with me.”

“You mean like have patience with you, or partners in literal crime?” Felicity asked, blowing on the steam that was wafting off of her mug because she felt no twisted alpha male need to show that she could deep throat lava.

“Ideally, the latter. However, according to my current partner, you’ll also need to do the first,” Bruce shrugged and gave her a small wry smile.

That face right there almost had her accepting. Which was, in her very humble opinion, some dangerous shit. She was bad luck. People around her either ran away or died.

“Bruce, you seem nice, but-” Felicity swallowed down the emotions in her voice and scolded herself for getting so emotional so suddenly. She put down her mug, looking up at Bruce seriously. “But I just want a normal life. I- something happened to me recently. I- I lost someone. It’s made me re-evaluate what I want from my life. And I don’t want adrenaline rushes or life or death. Not anymore. I just want to reduce the amount of damage that I cause by as much as possible.”

“Felicity-”

“Batman is a hero. You are a hero. I’ve read about what you do. You help people. You should keep doing that, and I’ll keep your secret. I just can’t help you.”

“You could be a hero, too.”

“No. I’m no hero,” She looked down at her feet and absentmindedly pushed her now blonde hair out of her face. “I’m just an IT girl. Nothing more. Nothing less.”

Bruce nodded and stepped forward to reach his hand out for a shake. “I hope that you won’t mind it if I try to prove you wrong. Or if WE offers you a job.”

Felicity huffed out a laugh and took Bruce’s hand. “Sounds like a bet I’d sucker someone else into taking.”

“Hey, you grew up in Vegas. The odds are always in your favor.” Bruce smiled and pulled his hand away. “I will be calling you soon, Ms. Smoak.”

“You shan’t wear me down, Mr. Wayne. I’ve got nerves of steel.”

“See, now you’re just adding to your list of qualifications.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, yeah. That was just the epilogue. This story will be too long and full of much drama and sarcasm, as per my usual. Please leave me comments to let me know what you liked and didn't like. Also, excuse any Batman you're not used to. I'm basing him mostly off of the cartoon Batman who is very much snark incarnate.
> 
> Thank you so much for reading! Stay on the lookout for more! :)
> 
> Fun Fact: "fuck" is the 5th most used word in this chapter.
> 
> **CREDIT FOR AMAZING ARTWORK GOES TO LADEMONESSA WHO IS HONESTLY THE PERSONIFICATION A RAINBOW?**


	2. Holding Onto Smoak pt. 1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Batman starts calling a tiny little blonde and somehow she weasels her way into his heart.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> okay, so I planned on having this chapter come out sooner, but once I started writing, I couldn't stop. I had to break this up into two different chapters for fuck's sake. these are some memorable phone calls between Bruce and Felicity through their first meeting to season two of Arrow.

The first time Batman calls Felicity Smoak, it’s purely to check in with her. To make sure that she was okay and that she hadn’t revealed his secret. He didn’t exactly know what he was expecting, but it wasn’t getting his head bit off the minute the call connected.

“I already told you, Brendon, you’ll have the shit by the morning. I’ve been up for 80 hours working on this, I just need a break, so would you oh-so-kindly fuck the fuck off?” Felicity growled into her phone without bothering to look at the caller ID. She had only just been able to doze off, sprawled out spread eagle over her tiny mattress. 

“Good morning to you, too, Ms. Smoak.” Bruce couldn’t help the slight smirk on his face at Felicity’s stunned silence.

“Well, fuck me.” She muttered into her pillow. “Mr. Wayne. How nice to hear from you again. Glad you’re not dead. Not that I thought you were, I just hadn’t heard from you in a few months. Which might be normal, I didn’t exactly know how this was gonna work. I mean, I know that you left your number, but I figured it was one of those ‘in case of emergency’ type deal. Not like we were friends. I mean, we could be friends, I’d like to be friends. But it’s not like...we are...right now. And I’m gonna shut up.”

“Don't let me stop you,” Bruce chuckled.

“Shut up, I’m running on fumes,” Felicity pouted.

Bruce felt his eyebrows furrow in concern that he hadn’t expected to feel. “Everything okay?”

“Yeah, just an idea this kid had. He needs an unbeatable encrypted firewall, but he’s a luddite.” Felicity rolled her eyes. “A luddite with very deep pockets and unusually fucking thorough research. I can’t very well just hand him something unhackable because I don’t exactly trust him with that kind of power, but I can’t half ass this because he’ll be able to sniff out a play from a mile away.”

“You need money badly enough to work for 80 hours?”

“Huh? No, I spent 72 of those hours working on my thesis.” Felicity groaned at the thought of it. “I would rather wrestle a bear. Or you. I’d honestly rather fight you, Bruce.”

“I’m shaking with fear,” Bruce deadpanned.

“You will be if I have to put more time into my thesis,” Felicity quipped back before rolling onto her back. “So--don’t get me wrong--I’m happy to hear to from you, but why now?”

“Just checking in.” Bruce tried to figure out just how the blonde had gotten on his mind. He’d simply been going through some old cases in the save whenever he’d found a trace of one of Felicity’s programs. Instead of the annoyance he’d felt when he’d first discovered the leak, Bruce had leaned back and mentally calculated how long it’d been since he’d met the disarming woman. The number he’d come up with was, apparently, too large for comfort, because the next thing he knew, he’d had the phone to his ear and was waiting for her to answer. “You think about my offer?”

“I’m a broke college student who’s a semester away from graduating with exactly one current job offer--yours. Of course I’ve been thinking about it.”

“And?”

“And, I’m tired. I haven’t slept, eaten, or showered. The only thing I’ve had to drink have been about twenty cans of redbull.” Felicity could feel her voice slipping into a tired mumble. “I don’t believe that I can make a decision right now.”

“Get some sleep, Felicity. I’ll call and check in every now and then.” Bruce murmured back.

“Goodnight, Bruce-man. I mean Bat-Wayne. I mean- fuck it. I’m going to sleep.”

*

“My boss is an asshole, and I’d like the Batman to come teach him a lesson right now immediately,” Felicity answered the phone mid-rant, making Bruce work hard to keep up from the get go. “I assume that the reason you’re calling is because this is my third day at QC and you’re trying to see how I’m doing while still pretending we aren’t really friends.”

“Now why would I deny that we’re friends?” Bruce muttered as he continued picking a lock. Being on the phone was a convenient cover while looking for information during the day, so the call had more than one purpose. That was what Bruce told himself, at least, so that he could get away with calling her. 

“Are you telling me what I think you’re telling me Bruce?” Felicity grinned in delight as she tapped away on her laptop at work.

“Yes, Felicity. You’re my friend.”

“My heart just stopped in my chest. You, oh wordsmith, have melted every bone in my body with your silver tongue. Truly they will shape stars to write the words that you so graciously offer me. Pure poetry that most Englishmen could never quite achieve.” Felicity babbled teasingly.

Bruce got the lock open and started rifling through classified files--yes, actual paper files. “Someone’s in a good mood. I thought your boss was giving you a hard time.”

“Yes, I am. I had an epiphany!”

“Care to share?” Bruce felt the tension that he’d always carried with him start to melt away with her words--it was the usual reaction that he would have to her voice. Somehow she just relaxed him. He wasn’t joking earlier; over the last year, he’d grown to view Felicity as a precious friend. This was a kind of friendship that Bruce Wayne had no real experience with, but he kept it close to his heart. He kept their conversations--her words and secrets and smiles--to himself. These phone calls were his and Felicity’s little secret.

A part of him felt better simply knowing that there was a part of Felicity that belonged only to him.

“I like the way that I am.” Her tone betrayed the satisfied smile on her face. “Nothing is going to change that. Bad shit has happened, but I can’t let that dictate my entire life. Feeling things may lead to getting hurt again, but it could also lead to being happy again. And, serious Felicity talk for a minute, I- I want to be happy. Happy with who I am, what I can do, and who I know. And I am.”

Bruce retrieved his desired file and smiled softly into his phone. “Felicity?”

“Yes, Brucie?” Felicity asked, her tone mocking his seriousness.

“Never change.” He told her softly.

“Mmm, no can do, Bat-O. Life is change. I’m just gonna try my hardest to change for the best! And you, too! Don’t you dare start getting even more broody on me, Bruce. I’ll fight you!” She warned him playfully.

“Well, if I did start brooding more,” Bruce pointed out as he merged with a tour group in the lobby of the IT floor. “You’d have no choice but to come down to Gotham and work with me so you could personally pull me out of my funk.”

“That is some batty logic there, Bruce.” She huffed out a laugh. Bruce managed to keep in the instinctual groan at yet another one of her bat puns. They never ended.

“Just how many of those have you thought up?” He asked, a mixture of dread and curiosity reserved itself in his mind just for her reaction. 

“More than ten, less than fifty.” Felicity rattled off absentmindedly.

Once Bruce made his way through the crowds and out into the Gotham streets, he let himself relax a tad bit more. “Why were you mad at your boss?”

“Ugh, the usual.” Felicity leaned back in her chair exhaustedly. “He’s a stereotypical 50-something Christian white guy, you know? Sexist as fuck. I got headhunted for this job! They even had to compete with your offer of--and I quote--’whatever the hell I want’! Then I get here two days ago and they treat me like I’m some fucking secretary! And, I mean, there’s nothing wrong with being a secretary, but I went to MIT, dammit! I may be blonde, and I may wear polka dot dresses and cartoon cat sweaters, and I may be cute as hell, but I worked hard to get here. I just wasn’t expecting to show up here after they fought so hard for me, only to have them treat me like trash.”

Bruce pursed his lips in sympathetic outrage on her part. They both knew how hard QC worked to get her, even if the final deciding factor was that she wanted to be closer to her mother. “You know where you’d always be appreciated? Wayne Enterprises.”

“I’m not giving that asshole the satisfaction of quitting,” Felicity growled fiercely, slighting startling the vigilante. “I’m gonna show that fucker who’s the genius around here. I will undermine his authority and the second he even tests the limit of company boundaries, his ass is grass.”

Bruce debated internally whether or not he was supposed to comment on that particularly vindictive tangent before deciding to steer the conversation back to the positive. He didn’t want her to have to use her Loud Voice on him again. He got enough of that the last time she called him and chewed him out for not telling her that Dick had branched out on his own.

“So, how’d you get to your epiphany if you’ve been planning your revenge?” Bruce asked wryly.

“I realized that even if I wear shoes with cats wearing glasses on them,” Felicity started, making Bruce smile softly to himself because the mental image was just so...Felicity. “I’m a strong, independent Jewish woman. I am a badass who even Batman wants to recruit. I can be girly and a feminist at the same time and anyone who says any differently? They can watch me wreak havoc on their credit scores.”

Bruce couldn’t help the genuine smile that tugged at the corners of his mouth as he listened to her, pride welling up in his chest. “I know that the Batman would never dare to cross anyone with that much power. He’d probably want to join forces, though.”

“Yeah, but I can’t exact my revenge from Gotham,” Felicity laughed lightly.

“Hey, if anyone could.”

“I have to go, Bruce. Did you get whatever you needed?” She asked in a low voice.

Part of Bruce startled at the fact that she knew what he was up to, but he quickly chastised himself. Of course she knew. “Yeah, I’m good. Happy hunting.”

“You bet it will be,” A dangerous smile curled over Felicity’s lips. “And same to you. Call me to check in sometime soon, please? Afterall, I’d rather not have to go through Alfred again. That man is a saint for putting up with you for so long.”

“Do the Jews believe in saints?” Bruce countered.

“You know that I’m about as religious as a toaster, Bruce Wayne. Stop avoiding the fact of like that you’re a mess without your butler. Tell Alfred hi for me, oh, and remind him to send me that scone recipe we talked about. But I really have to go because my supervisor is coming back from lunch so, bye!” Felicity rushed out before her sweet voice was abruptly replaced by the ambience of the street.

Bruce pocketed his phone and shook his head, the corner of his mouth ticked up in a rare smile as he gave himself a few minutes to realize how lucky he was to find himself a friend and ally in Felicity. An ally who, apparently, traded recipes with his butler in between work and threatening her boss.

(It was no surprise that he was falling in love, not really.)

*

Felicity called him about three seconds before he called her, his eyes locked on the screen in front of him.

Moira Queen admitting to a conspiracy to destroy the Glades.

Batman was on the other side of the goddamn country. There was nothing he could do. No matter what laws he broke, he wouldn’t be able to get to her in time.

“Tell me you’re out of town,” Bruce answered gruffly. “Tell me you’ve been evacuated--”

“I can’t, Bruce.” Felicity answered, a slight waver in her voice. “I, uh...you know how you want me to be a hero?”

“Not right now I don’t,” Bruce could hear the echo of her uncertainty in his own voice. Jason turned to look at him warily, unsure of what to do if Bruce was ever...emotional.

“I can save lives, Bruce. I don’t have time to explain, but I can help these people, but--”

“Felicity, please.” Bruce whispered out in a pained voice.

“Bruce, just tell me in plain words. That’s what I need. You were the only person who’s ever believed that I could be more than just some hacker. Can I be a hero?” Felicity’s voice was steady as she asked him, but he could hear the fear. It almost pained him.

“I think...I think you are already a hero.” Bruce answered. “I think whatever I say, you’ll do anything you can to help anyone you see.”

There was a pause on the line.

“Felicity?” Bruce asked, an almost desperate note inching into the forefront of his mind.

“Thank you, Bruce.” Felicity took a centering breath. “I have to go. I’ll call you tomorrow.”

“I’ll come see you tomorrow.” Bruce promised.

“I’m planning on building a blanket fort and downing a bottle of wine tomorrow.”

“Sounds like a game plan. Just...make sure we don’t have to sneak wine and blankets into a hospital.” Bruce whispered.

“I promise,” Felicity tried before she hung up.

(She lived. When he got there the next day, Jason watched in curiosity as a tiny blonde in a blanket fort refused to be intimidated by the Batman into going to Gotham. She even yelled at him. After Bruce got his head out of his ass, the three of them went out to dinner and Jason could see why Bruce begged this woman not to be a hero.)

*

Four missed calls had Bruce’s nerves on edge. It had been a month since Jason and Bruce wasn’t ashamed to admit that he’d been calling Felicity fairly often. She had been busy--he suspected that she was working with the Arrow vigilante, but kept it to himself, she’d tell him when she’s ready--but she always carved out time for him. She’d even fallen asleep on the phone with him a week ago.

He listened to her steady breathing for about fifteen minutes before he could bring himself to hang up.

But, over his friendship with Felicity, he’d learned that the blonde was never far from her phone. She always had a charger with her and never turned it off. She was constantly juggling about sixty things to do and she did at least twenty of those on her phone. Hell, even when she was in Russia, she’d called him from the airport both when she left and when she came back.

He stared down at the picture of her for her contact photo on his phone. She’d taken it when he and Jason had gone to check up on her after the earthquake. She had one arm wrapped around Jason’s shoulders while the other had held out Bruce’s phone. Her nose was scrunched up, mouth open mid-laugh as Jason looked up at her with a bemused smile. Bruce knew that there was another selfie of the two of them on Felicity’s bedside table.

He was almost startled when the phone lit up with a call.

Speak of the devil, he thought wryly.

“Are you okay?” Bruce answered, his anxiety built up to a level that only came when she was involved.

“I...yeah. Sorry for not calling you back earlier--” Her voice shook as she started to apologize.

“Don’t worry about that. Just, talk to me, Felicity.” Bruce tried not to beg. He could hear Felicity breathing rapidly over the phone until a deeper voice, farther away from the receiver, told her to slow down. She thanked the person quietly and Bruce waited until her breathing had calmed to speak again. “Felicity?”

“I got kidnapped.” She spoke with a clinical detachment. “The Count he grabbed me and used me as bait for the Arrow.”

“Are you okay? Physically?” Bruce asked, voice gruff with anger that some half-rate psychopath had touched her.

“Yeah, Detective Lance says that I’m in shock. He wanted me to call som- fuck.” Felicity let out a quiet sob. “I heard the words ‘call someone’ and just dialed your number. I need to call Digg to come pick me up, but I--”

“Felicity, it’s okay.” He assured her gently. “You can always call me.”

“You’re not always the greatest at answering,” She sniffed.

“You don’t have to make light of this for me. You don’t have to be funny,” Bruce promised her quietly. 

“I know, Bruce, I’m just...shaken up. I just always feel better after I, you know, talk to you. You...you relax me.” She admitted quietly.

“The Count, did he get away?” Bruce asked dangerously.

“Nah, he’s down for the count.” Felicity breathed out. “I mean, fuck. That was not supposed to be a pun, goddammit, he’s dead.”

Good.

“Who’s Digg?” Bruce switched gears, hoping not to give away just how much anger was bubbling under the surface at the thought of her being hurt. The Count was lucky he was dead before Bruce had gotten his hands on him.

“My friend.” She answered. “He- well, I actually can’t call him anyway because he’s sick. He’s my boss’ bodyguard. We saw him at Big Belly Burger when you came down.”

“John Diggle?” Bruce remembered the large man who’d hugged Felicity warmly in greeting when they’d walked into the burger joint that Felicity had raved about.

“That’s him.” Felicity laughed humorlessly. “He’s my only friend here. I don’t- who am I supposed to call?”

“I can be there in five hours,” Bruce promised.

“I know, and I appreciate it, but I don’t have that kind of...time. Digg?” Bruce listened as Felicity pulled her phone away from her face. “What are you doing here? You look like crap!”

_”I came here because you were kidnapped, Felicity. I can fight through a little cold.”_

“Oh, my god. You absolute bonehead. I’m so happy to see you, but I’m so pissed at you. Did the herbs work?”

_”No, but Star Labs is handing out some cures. I’ll be fine in no time, Felicity. No need to mother everyone.”_

“I do not mother everyone!” Felicity argued.

“You gave Jason a chore chart for the week we were there. You had him doing dishes.” Bruce pointed out, a bittersweet taste on his tongue at the memory.

“That was not a chore chart, it was a schedule of home improvements for Jason and I to do together. Mind your own business, broody!” Felicity scolded him.

“Yes, mother.” Bruce teased her lightly, the ball of anxiety in his chest loosening the more and more normal she sounded.

_”Who are you talk to?”_

“Bruce, he’s my best friend. He gets worried when I don’t answer his calls.” Felicity told her friend easily, causing Bruce’s heart to clench. “Plus, I don’t know...he makes me feel better.”

_”Good. Now, wrap up on the phone and I’ll talk to Detective Lance to see if he needs anything. After that, you’re going straight home and to bed. I’ll pick you up in the morning to get your car.”_

“Who’s mothering who now, you big teddy bear.” Felicity muttered. “Sorry about that, Digg is like the big brother I never wanted.”

“You like it, though.” Bruce felt a twinge of possessiveness over her, but gratefulness to the man who’d been there for her outweighed it by a longshot. “Doting big brother seems like a perfect fit for you.”

Felicity smiled softly. “I do. Other than you, he’s one of my first real friends.”

“I heard from I reliable source that I just happen to be your best friend.” Bruce smiled to himself.

“Whatcha gonna do about it, Wayne?”

_”Wait, Bruce Wayne!?”_

“I’m going to let you get some rest and call you tomorrow afternoon.” Bruce told her, his tone lowering to be more gentle.

“Sounds good. Goodnight, Bruce.”

“Stay safe,” He whispered before hanging up.

*

“Bruce the moose!” Felicity cooed affectionately into his ear the minute he answered her call. “He’s my friend, Sara, it’s fine!”

“Who’s Sara?” Bruce’s eyebrows furrowed in confusion. “Are you drunk?”

“No, shhh!” Felicity shushed him before giggling. “Could you ‘magine if I sh’d the Bat?”

Bruce felt the corners of his mouth tick up in an amused grin. “It would definitely be something.”

 _”I don’t know, Digg, she keeps saying that she’s calling a moose!”_ An exasperated voice carried from Felicity’s side of the call.

“Who’s that?” Bruce asked.

“Tha’s Sara! She’s my assass- ass ass friend!” Felicity stumbled over her words. “She’s got the best ass! The greatest! World’s best ass!”

 _”Well, thank you, Cutie. Digg, how many of those did you give her? She’s high as a kite!”_ This Sara sounded both amused and worried.

 _”How do you know she isn’t just bragging to Bruce the moose about your ass? You’re the one that said that there was a queer girl inside her somewhere.”_ That voice, Bruce could recognize as Diggle’s. Bruce felt himself relax a bit, knowing that the brotherly man was with Felicity, even if she wasn’t in her right mind.

_”I was just hoping that that queer girl would be me!”_

“I got shot!” Felicity boasted, a wide grin on her face as she listed back and forth on her stool.

Bruce felt his blood run cold, his previous amusement fading quickly. “What?”

“I meant shotssssssss,” Felicity hissed for a bit before giggling. “Ass ass is a bartend’r and we got shotss, right Ass ass? Ass ass, tell Bruce what hap’n’d! ‘M a hero!”

“Felicity?” Bruce asked, worry still coloring his expression.

_”Yes, Cutie. You’re a hero. If Bruce or anyone else tries to say otherwise, you show them my way.”_

“Aww! Ass!” Felicity squealed and giggled happily, the sound unraveling the last of Bruce’s anxiety. “Bruce thoh’ I was a hero ‘fore ‘nyone else! He wouldn’t say that! Right, Bruce?”

“Right, Felicity.” Bruce settled in his chair and listened to the blonde babble. He had about four WE related stacks of paperwork that he was supposed to be doing, but he’d never heard Felicity sound so...happy. Or rather, unburdened. “You’re my hero.”

“DIGG! ‘JA HEAR THA’? I’M BRUCIE’S HERO!” Felicity yelled to Diggle. She lowered his voice to an conspiratorial whisper. “Brucie, you’re my hero! I think you saved me...at MIT...I thoh’ I was a mon’ter. But you said I could be more. Took me a while to do it, but I wan’ make you proud to call me your friend.”

_”Well...shit. Digg--”_

_”He’s her best friend, Sara. I’m sure he can handle this better than us.”_

Bruce felt his heart clench in his chest. “Felicity, I’ve always been proud to call you my best friend.”

“Really?”

“Really,” Bruce nodded, even though he knew she couldn’t see him. “I want to make you proud, too.”

“BRUCIE!” She squealed happily.

“Yes, Felicity?” Bruce chuckled at her enthusiasm.

“I’ma make you a shirt! Bruce the moose Wayne: Best Best Best Friend Ever!”

“Three bests?”

“Infinity bests!” Felicity overbalanced and ended up falling out of her stool. Her phone fell to the ground beside her while she fell onto her, thankfully uninjured, shoulder. Diggle was up immediately, helping her sit up.

Bruce called out her name worriedly before staying quiet to listen to the voices away from the phone. 

_“Digg, ‘m tired.”_

_“Go to sleep. You were very brave today. You did good.”_

“Hey, moose,” the voice Bruce had identified as Sara’s picked up the phone. “It seems that our girl got a little too drunk. She’s falling asleep, so she’ll have to let you go.”

Bruce pursed his lips in annoyance, but could understand the protectiveness over Felicity. “Make sure she gets home okay.”

“I will. She- you’ve got yourself a special girl.”

“I know,” Bruce smiled softly at the thought of Felicity. “I’d rather have her in my corner than anyone else.”

“Bruce Wayne: billionaire playboy, thoroughly wrapped around the little finger of an IT expert. How’d that happen?”

Bruce chuckled to himself. “Well, I have to let you go, so I can’t give you everything. Long story, short? She hacked me.”

Sara chuckled knowingly. “I’ll keep her safe. I owe her one.”

“Owe?”

“She saved my life.” Sara smiled softly at the woman sitting on the ground having a Very Serious conversations with Digg about bunny slippers. “In more ways than one. You know if she’s at all gay? Because I may be in love.”

Bruce clenched his jaw and tensed. “I really must be going now. Have a safe night, Sara.”

“You, too, Bruce the moose.” Sara grinned wickedly.

(Bruce figured that Felicity couldn’t remember the phone call, but two days later, he received a package from Starling: a t-shit with the words “Infinite Bests Best Friend Bruce Wayne”.)

*

The next time Bruce calls Felicity, he was returning a call he’d missed while he’d been on an extended trip. The Batman was busy helping Superman in Metropolis and while Bruce wanted nothing more than to drop everything and talk to Felicity until threats from Luthor were a distant memory, he and Clarke couldn’t afford the luxury.

He was already on edge when he’d dialed her number. Her greeting didn’t help.

“Hey, Bruce!” Felicity’s voice sounded forced. The brightness that had once relaxed him was gone and in its place was a high-pitched tension that made Bruce’s chest twist with anxiety.

“Felicity? What’s wrong?” Bruce turned on the computer in the cave and started typing away to get to his program that he’d set up for when Starling was in danger, only to find the program stopped. “Felicity, you hacked me?”

“I can’t- I can’t tell you how quickly everything’s been happening,” Felicity spoke careful, her words measured with an aftertaste of panic.

“Are you being watched?” Bruce asked.

“Sorta. I think I’m safe, I- the city went to hell,” Felicity let out a quiet sob that was immediately muffled--Bruce could practically see her putting her hand over her mouth to cover the sounds of her own cries.

“Five hours, Felicity. Tell me you can hold out that long,” Bruce practically begged as he tried to work around the information blackout Felicity had dropped onto his system.

“You can’t do anything here.” Felicity whispered, her voice cracking and adding to Bruce’s agony.

“I have to try!”

Felicity let out a strangled laugh. “Yeah, well, that’s what makes you my hero. But, I have...I have to do something. I’m ready to do something. I can’t just sit here.”

Bruce let out a pained noise. “Felicity, please, whatever you’re doing, tell me you’ve thought it through.”

“I have.” Felicity promised. “It’ll be stupid and heroic and…”

“And?”

“And I care about you, B.” Felicity used the nickname to avoid letting Deathstroke know Bruce’s name. Bruce felt another pained noise bubbling up in his throat at the thought. Even now, Felicity was trying her hardest to keep him out of the blast radius.

“Felicity, this is not a goodbye call!” Bruce growled. He could hear Alfred and Tim on the other side of the cave, their silence as they watched him was deafening.

“Maybe you’re right,” Felicity nervously swallowed. “But I can’t take any chances and neither of us can really control this.”

“What about the Arrow?”

“I knew you knew about that,” She laughed, but the sound was wrong. Clogged with emotion and helplessness. “He um...he’s doing his best, but…”

“Dammit, is this part of his plan?” Bruce yelled.

“I have to go,” Felicity took a deep breath.

“I’ll see you tomorrow.”

“You’re busy. I checked.” Felicity told him. “I’ll call you. After all of this.”

“Felicity, don’t--” Bruce started, the word dying on his tongue. He couldn’t tell her not to do whatever she was about to do. He couldn’t tell her not to be a hero. It was part of who she was. It was part of the person he needed her to be. “Don’t die.”

“The words of a poet,” Felicity quipped quietly. “I have to go, B. I- you’re my best friend. This isn’t your fault either. Tell your sweet little beagle hello for me, too. And the new bird.”

“Felicity, I can’t say goodbye right now,” Bruce whispered.

Felicity let out a humorless laugh. It made Bruce’s stomach feel hollow. “I’ll see you later.”

“You will.”

Felicity hung up after a second of silence.

The bat signal went up. Penguin broke out of Arkham. Gotham needed the Batman.

(Bruce Wayne was dying inside until he got the text hours later from Felicity.

_Not dead. Wayne Manor big enough for a guest for a few days?_

Seeing that she was alive and well was enough for Bruce. For now.)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fun Fact: "ass" is the 20th most used word in this chapter, and Bruce's name is used more frequently than Felicity's.


	3. Holding Onto Smoak Pt. 2

“Fucking. Deathstroke.” Bruce growled out as the plane touched down in Starling. The city was a mess of destruction from the air. Bruce was almost angrier at the fact that he had to learn about this from Waller instead of Felicity than that Felicity hadn’t told him about Deathstroke.

Almost.

Alfred’s contacts were in a frenzy when the man had finally gotten a hold of them. The minute Bruce was finished with the Penguin, he and Tim were in the batplane on their way to Starling with Alfred in their ear briefing them on the situation as best he could.

That is, until Amanda fucking Waller hijacked their frequency and gave them a slightly more extensive debrief.

Slade Wilson, aka Deathstroke. Mirakuru soldiers. League of Assassins.

“What have you gotten yourself into, Smoak?” Bruce thought out loud as he and Tim jumped out of the plane to meet up where Waller had told them Team Arrow was recuperating. The Queen Manor might’ve been impressive, if Bruce was anyone else. As it was, his best friend had been put in danger by a psychopath in a hood with a bow and arrow and Bruce wasn’t in an appreciative mood.

When Bruce got into the main room, it felt as if the world had stopped.

There she was. Alive and well. Breathing and smiling. She was banged up, her ponytail messy and dried blood on her face. She was shaking, most likely from the adrenaline crash, but she was _there_.

“Felicity,” Bruce breathed out, alerting everyone in the room to his presence. Felicity turned towards him and grinned in exasperation, even as the people around her readied themselves for a fight.

“Bats!” Felicity pulled herself up and walked over to him, throwing her arms around his neck in a tight hug that he returned without a second thought. “I told you not to come.”

“You shut me out,” Bruce grumbled. “I was worried.”

“Felicity?” A gruff voice from behind her pulled her attention back to her friends.

“Oh, yeah. Oliver, this is--”

“Batman. You know Batman?” A woman with a blonde wig asked incredulously.

“Yeah,” Felicity shrugged. “I guess he got worried and came to make sure I was okay.”

“Bruce,” Nyssa nodded at him, earning a glare from the dark knight.

“Wait, Bruce?” Diggle asked. “Bruce Wayne? Your best friend?”

“Ha! They figured out your secret identity first!” Tim grinned from beside him. He held out a hand to Felicity. “Hi, I’m Tim, the new Robin. You had his batarangs in a twist since that call. I don’t think Penguin will ever forgive you.”

“I told him not to worry, but he’s too stubborn to listen to me. It was all part of the plan.” Felicity told Tim sweetly, bypassing his hand to pull him into a hug. She pulled away and smiled up at Bruce. “Thank you for showing up uninvited, though. I was gonna do the same to you. After I’d had a chance to sleep and drop someone off in a remote island prison.”

“Bruce Wayne is Batman,” A kid in a red hoodie muttered to himself. “And blondie’s best friend.”

“Felicity, you know the Batman, and you never told us?” The Arrow looked down at her with a slightly hurt expression.

“First of all, it wasn’t my secret to tell.” Felicity told him, glaring back at him without flinching. “Second of all, what? Did you think you were my first billionaire vigilante?”

“Yes!” Oliver shot back. He looked up at Bruce warily. “But thank you so much for giving him a hint at my identity!”

 

“I already know your identities,” Bruce shot back. “Oliver Queen, John Diggle, Sara Lance, Roy Harper, Laurel Lance, and Nyssa Al Ghul.”

Oliver gave Felicity a betrayed look. “You told him who we are?”

“Of course not, Oliver!” Felicity scoffed, hurt by his lack of trust. “Bruce is a genius! He knew about you before he even knew I was helping you!”

“Which reminds me,” Bruce stepped passed Felicity, who’d put herself between the two. He wound his arm back and punched Oliver in the face. “You used her as bait!?”

“I did what I had to do!” Oliver growled back, jumping back onto his feet. He was seconds away from attacking Bruce back when Felicity stepped between them again.

“As awesome as this pissing contest is,” Felicity yelled, both of them freezing up at the used of her Loud Voice. “I’m wearing a lovely shade of no sleep, so I don’t think either of you want to piss me off! So, get your heads out of your asses before I get Sara and Nyssa to do it for you!”

“I love that I’m her enforcer.” Sara sighed happily.

“Indeed,” Nyssa looked the small woman up and down once more. “It seems she has a special effect on our kind of people.”

“Queer women or vigilantes?” Digg asked dryly.

“Felicity, he put you in danger,” Bruce spoke quietly to her. She tilted her head and looked at him compassionately.

“It’s my life, Bruce. It was my choice. My plan. My decision.” Felicity’s words were soft, but left no room for argument. “If you want to punch someone in the face for putting me in danger, punch me. Or better yet, punch the danger. I’m sure you’d love to meet Slade.”

“We’ve already met,” Bruce told her, voice thick with emotions. “That’s why I--”

Felicity blinked at him in surprise before pulling him down into another hug. “I’m here, Bruce. I’m okay. I’m alive.”

Bruce relaxed against her without thinking. “I’m still gonna kick his ass.”

“Like to see you try, Wayne,” Oliver growled before turning on his heel to walk away from the pair.

“You’re not going to kick his ass,” Felicity instructed him. “Because we’re going to stick Slade on Lian Yu, and then I’m going to Gotham to visit with you and Tim. Okay?”

“Okay,” Bruce agreed simply.

“Bruce Wayne: billionaire, playboy, hard ass vigilante, still wrapped around the little finger of a tiny blonde.” Sara smirked at the pair in front of them.

Roy shook his head in amusement. “I always knew blondie was going to rule the world one day, but even Batman won’t go against her. She’s too powerful.”

“I don’t know about you, Roy,” Digg smirked. “But I’m not gonna go against her. That Loud Voice is scary as hell.”

“It’s like she can make you feel like a two year old headed for a time-out,” Roy agreed.

“I think I’d enjoy a world ruled by Cutie.” Sara laughed. “All of your egos would be in check 24/7.”

*

Felicity rolled over in her bed, a slight pressure on her forehead tugging at the part part of her brain that wanted to be aware. She could hear a low chuckle before she settled down once more.

Hours later, once she’d managed to get enough sleep to function, she woke up to a note on her bedside table.

_Call me if you need anything._

She let out a happy sigh and snuggled into pillow before grabbing her phone and shooting Bruce a text.

_Ditto._

*

It was six in the morning. Alfred was trying to drag Bruce out of bed when his phone rang. At seeing Felicity’s face on his screen, Bruce was immediately concerned. Alfred left to give him privacy, but not before giving him a smug expression.

“Felicity? Why are you calling so early?” Bruce grumbled, sleep still tinting his voice.

“Sara’s dead.” Felicity sniffed. She looked around her small apartment--so bright and colorful and irritating. How could anything still be bright if Sara was dead? “I don’t- Bruce, I’ve never lost anyone like- she was murdered and I--”

“Felicity, slow down.” Bruce instructed her calmly while a sympathetic rage bubbled up in his chest. He’d never wanted her to know this kind of loss. “Breathe.”

“She was always so strong, Bruce.” Felicity whimpered, the sound breaking his heart. “She’s the strongest person I ever met. And I just buried her in the middle of the night in a grave that was empty because she already died once and this kind of miracle only happens once, right? I can’t- I don’t want to picture a world where she isn’t here. She was so strong because, even after everything, she could smile. She could joke, and laugh, and she flirted. All of the time. Always flirting.”

Bruce smiled slightly at the memory of this girl that Felicity was sharing with him. He sat up on his bed and leaned back against the headboard. “Tell me about her,” He asked softly as he silently grabbed a tablet from his bedside table. He quickly did a search on ‘Sara’s that had died and come back in Starling.

“The first time I met her she called me cute,” Felicity remembered. He could hear her moving on sheets, could picture her laying down on her bed on her side and sharing stories with him quietly. He agreed with Sara’s opinion. The mental image was definitely cute. He cursed himself for the train of thought and refocused his efforts on the search. “That was what she called me. ‘Cutie’. She would- she’d always make these jokes about being half in love with me. She could keep up with Digg and Arrow any day of the week and turn around and talk to me about computers. I was so jealous of her at first.”

“Really?” Bruce asked. “I thought you two were friends?”

“I got over it. I got a little reckless,” Felicity blushed, embarrassed at her past actions. “I felt so insecure, like she’d replace me on the team. We were up against a computer genius. He was...better than me. I outsmarted him, in the end, but I was so stupid. She came to rescue me. I think she was proud of me, though. The look on her face, like I had proven every good thing she’d ever thought about the world. She said that I was the only one who made her feel like a person again.”

Bruce chuckled at that assessment, not finding it within himself to disagree. Felicity was disarming and innocent. She radiated the type of light that drew in broken people. A beacon of hope for all that were lost--that was how Tim had described her when she’d visited them. 

Bruce focused back on Felicity. She’d lost herself in thought. Bruce cleared his throat and thought about what to say. “Tim said something similar about you. Sara must have been able to see it, too.”

“Sara could see anything about a person.” Felicity chuckled quietly. “I took a bullet for her, you know? That day I called you--”

“You were high on painkillers? Please tell me you went to a hospital,” Bruce sighed in exasperation at her responding silence. “I used to think that if I didn’t die of old age, it’d be my own fault, but it won’t be mine. It’ll be yours. Because you’re going to give me a heart attack.”

“If only the good folks at Arkham knew that the Batman was a worry wart.” Felicity laughed softly. Her voice dropped to a quieter volume, the tone full of remorse. “I took a bullet for her. I would’ve taken those arrows, too.”

Bruce closed his eyes and sighed through his nose. “You can’t think like that. Taking that guilt on yourself, you’ll only drown in it.”

“So?” Felicity choked out.

“Take it from me,” Bruce told her gently. “When you drown in grief, the people you’re grieving wouldn’t be happy with who you become.”

“But that means that one way or another, I’d see her again so that she could kick my ass.” Felicity cried quietly. “If anyone could fuck over death and come back just to tell someone that they were making a bad idea, it’d be her.”

“Felicity--” Bruce started.

“I know,” Felicity cut him off. “I know that it’s impossible. She- she’d want me to keep fighting.”

“Can you?” Bruce asked, careful to keep any sort of judgement out of his tone.

“I have to.” Felicity whispered. “Can you keep talking to me, Bruce? Until I fall asleep?I don’t- I don’t want to feel alone right now.”

“Of course,” Bruce whisper gently.

*

“Felicity’s phone,” A bright voice greeted Bruce, making his eyebrows furrow together.

“Who are you?” He asked gruffly.

“I’m Donna Smoak, Felicity’s mother. Out of curiosity, your contact name on my daughter’s phone is ‘Bruce Wayne’ which I know can’t be true because that would mean that my dear daughter knows three billionaires and didn’t bother to tell me,” Donna started brightly. There was the sound like a door opening on the other end of the line.

 _”Mom, have you seen my phone? I could’ve sworn I heard it- Mom? What are you doing?”_ Felicity’s voice came closer to her phone.

“I hate to disappoint, but I am Bruce Wayne.” Bruce’s lips twitched in amusement. “May I speak to your daughter now, Ms. Smoak?”

“In a minute. First, I am obviously out of the loop when it comes to my daughter’s life.” Donna continued brightly, ignoring Felicity’s question. The sound of a scuffle came over the line as, Bruce imagined, Felicity tried to forcibly take the phone back. “Hush, sweetie, I’m speaking with your friend, Bruce Wayne. He’s going to tell me about your life. Okay, Mr. Wayne, first question: when did Lissie start working at Palmer Tech?”

Bruce chuckled under his breath, “Well, that would be a couple of weeks ago. I tried to get her to work for me--”

“Absolutely not, Mr. Wayne. I’m sorry, but the whole boss/employee dynamic can’t be conducive to a romance.” Donna dismissed him. She ignored Felicity’s squawk of protest and continued. “Not that it can’t be sexy, but poor Felicity just about had a stroke when I had to give her the talk. She’s a bit shy you know.”

_”Mom, I’m begging you. Please, stop. I’m not- I’m single, Mom. Stop harassing Bruce.”_

“I wouldn’t say it’s me who she’s harassing.” Bruce muttered in an amused tone.

“Hear that, Lis? Brucie doesn’t mind. Now, tell me, Bruce, what exactly are your intentions towards my daughter? It this a sugar daddy situation? Do you know everywhere she’s ticklish or are you still exploring? Here’s a hint: her hip has always been super ticklish. That’s how I’d win tickling wars when she was just a tiny little genius. Of course, you could also just be fu--”

 _”THAT’S IT!”_ Felicity yelled. There was a louder sound of an altercation before Bruce could clearly hear Felicity’s voice--Donna’s own voice sulking in the background.

“Not a word, Wayne, or I drain all of your accounts.” Felicity growled into the phone.

“So, ticklish, eh?” Bruce grinned to himself.

“Not. A. Word.” She repeated before letting out an exasperated sigh at her mother’s whining. “I have to go parent my mother. I’ll call you later tonight.”

“This virus, Felicity--” Bruce started.

“I took care of it. And I’ll tell you all you about it the next time I see you, but it’s not exactly an over the phone conversation. I’m okay, the team’s okay, but I have to go.”

“She loves you a lot.” Bruce told her gently. He could practically hear Felicity softening.

“I love her, too.” She whispered. “I’m good, Bruce. I promise.”

*

“Felicity,” Bruce answered his phone primly.

“Tell Dick to get off of my couch and back to Bludhaven,” Felicity demanded, her tone tired and annoyed.

“You were avoiding all of our calls. Dick and Alfred were worried,” Bruce explained breezily.

“Bullshit, your batego got hurt when you realized I was purposefully ducking you, so you sent Dick to get some sort of control over the situation.” Felicity growled. Dick shifted uncomfortably on her couch.

_”Do you two really need to drag me into this?”_

“Dick stays until I at least know what the situation is.” Bruce decided.

“Fight me, bat boy.” Felicity let out an angry noise. “I can’t deal with your ego and everything else right now, Bruce. I would like to spiral into alcoholism and anger without Dick’s puppy dog eyes judging me.”

Bruce growled. He could tell how close she was to breaking, but knew that with someone so stubborn, yelling wouldn’t accomplish anything. He soften his tone and lowered his voice. “I can’t be there right now, so I sent Dick to make sure you were okay. Just tell me what’s going on.”

There was a pause before Dick watched in horror as tears started streaming down Felicity’s cheeks.

_”Hey, wait, no, no! No crying! Bruce, what the fuck did you say to her! It’s okay, M &M.”_

“It- it’s not,” Felicity stuttered out. “Oliver’s dead. He- he’s dead and I can’t--”

_”I’ll, um, let you and Bruce talk. I’ll be in your kitchen, if you need a hug.”_

“Oliver’s dead,” She breathed out again. “He died to protect Thea, but he’s still dead. Sara’s dead, Oliver’s dead, Tommy’s dead. Why is it that the only people that manage to stay dead in this hellmouth are the people it needs? Fucking Malcolm Merlyn of all people stood in front of me and told me that Oliver was dead when it should’ve been- it should’ve been him, dammit!”

Realization dawned on Bruce like a punch in the gut. “You loved him.”

“No!” Felicity hissed. “Yes, maybe! I don’t know! He’s dead and I don’t know how the fuck I’m supposed to feel!”

“Felicity,” Bruce breathed out. “You’re entitled to whatever it is you’re feeling.”

“Anger,” She admitted. “A whole fucking lot of anger.”

“Feel it.” Bruce told her. “Fight through it.”

“I’m so tired, Bruce. I’m so tired of fighting.” Felicity admitted in a small voice.

“That’s what you have friends.” Bruce told her. “No one can walk through life alone. That’s why you have me.”

Felicity let in a stuttering breath as he tears slowed. “I think I’m gonna take Dick up on that offer for a hug, now.”

“He can stay there for a while. His team can cover Bludhaven. Let him help you out now that Oliver’s gone.” Bruce told her gently.

“Okay. Okay, I need- I need that hug and then I’m gonna get the team together. We’ll get the city back in order.” Felicity promised both Bruce and herself.

“If you need anything--”

“I’ll call you.”

“You could come by Gotham.”

“Bruce, I have a feeling that if I ever came to Gotham,” Felicity let out a sigh. “I’d never want to go anywhere else.”

*

“Felicity, where are you?” Bruce growled in greeting.

“Didn’t Dick show you the note?”

“You are not going to Nanda Parbat.”

“I am going to Nanda Parbat.”

“Felicity--”

“Bruce.”

Bruce let out an angry breath. “I can’t help you against the league. I have an agreement with them.”

“Dick filled me in. That’s why I didn’t tell you. I can’t have you risking that agreement because you’re a broody bat.” Felicity told him evenly.

“Is Queen making you go?” Bruce huffed. 

“He wanted me to stay.” Felicity ignored Bruce’s disdain at Oliver, knew that it was rightly earned by the other man, even if she’d forgiven him. “I disagreed. We’re now boarding Malcolm Merlyn’s private jet on a flight path to Narnia.”

“Malcolm--”

“I really gotta go, Bruce, bye!”

*

“You’re going on a road trip with him? After he kidnapped Diggle’s daughter and tried to kill all of you?” 

“That’s your ‘I’m Batman and you’re being stupid’ voice.” Felicity observed. “It was part of a plan.”

“That you didn’t know about.” Bruce growled.

“Is there a point to this?”

“I’m Batman and you’re being stupid.” Bruce told her bluntly.

“I’m Felicity and can make my own decisions.” Felicity shot back. “I- Bruce, I love him.”

“I understand that, but does it excuse him for keeping that secret?”

“He won’t keep any more secrets from me, Bruce. He knows better, now.”

Bruce sighed and grumbled. “...If he hurts you, I’m gonna kick his ass.”

“You’ll have to deal with whatever’s left of him after I’m done.”

*

“So, you’re back in Starling fighting crime,” Bruce started.

“You say that like the only new part is Star City, which by the way, is what we’re calling it now in memoriam of Ray.” Felicity tapped her fingers on her desk. “You knew.”

“That you couldn’t walk away from this life? Yes. I did.” Bruce smirked at his own correct assessment. “I’m more surprised that Diggle and Oliver are working together after everything.”

“Oh, they’re about to get their asses kicked. Both of them,” Felicity emphasized her words with a sickeningly sweet tone.

 _”Do you really need to threaten me while you’re on the phone?”_ Digg’s slightly annoyed voice echoed around the other side of the line. Bruce smirked. He knew the response Felicity was going to have for that tone. He’d been on the receiving end of her loud voice.

“Yes, I do! Because you were being an idiot! Oh, sorry, Bruce. I have to go. The second idiot has arrived and I have a thing or two to say!” Felicity yelled.

“Sic em, killer.” Bruce joked.

*

“Felicity’s a little busy right now, Wayne,” Oliver huffed as he picked up Felicity’s girlfriend as she’d ordered.

“She hasn’t been answering my calls,” Bruce grumbled unhappily.

“Count yourself as part of the club,” Oliver sighed and looked over at his girlfriend who was already back in work mode. “She’s working on something and hasn’t resurfaced in a couple of days. I’m gonna try to coax her away from her work soon, I tell her to call you after she’s slept.”

Bruce felt annoyance creeping over him at the casual way Oliver was able to take care of Felicity. Well, not annoyance. Jealousy.

Which was irrational, because all of his feelings for Felicity were platonic.

“Tell her that I can look at whatever she’s up to, but it’ll take me some time. That’ll give you a window to convince her to go to sleep. If not, the longest she’s gone without sleep is 96 hours. If you remind her at around 80 hours that she promised me not to do this anymore, she’ll pout, but she’ll listen.”

“I think I can handle my own girlfriend, Wayne,” Oliver huffed.

“I think I can handle my best friend--who I’ve known longer than you have--Queen.” Bruce shot back.

“Whatever, I’ll tell her to call you.” Oliver hung up on Bruce, who threw his phone onto the batcomputer irritatedly.

“It seems that your conversations with Mr. Queen aren’t as relaxing as the ones with Ms. Smoak. I understand the sentiment. He tried to butt in when I was giving the young miss a cooking lesson one evening. Pesky man wouldn’t leave until she used her Loud Voice.” Alfred remarked.

“I don’t like him.” Tim pouted. “There’s just something off about him when he’s with her. He just looks...guilty.”

Bruce leaned back in his chair and nodded gravely, mentally going over how many time Queen had kept his precious little secrets. The number time of times Felicity had almost gotten killed because of them. Alfred gave Bruce a knowing look.

“The reason he might appear guilty, might be the sheer number of secrets he’s taken to hiding from his team.” Alfred told Tim primly. “As we well know, secrets within a team can only end badly. He isn’t trained to operate as part of a unit, and when he tries he ends up leaving out intel that could harm his allies.”

“He’s dangerous,” Bruce growled. “He’s an adrenaline junkie who goes in half cocked. I trained you to think ten steps ahead. I think it’d hurt whatever’s left of Queen’s brain to think two. That kind of person can only get other people killed when they step in to clean up his mess.”

Tim quietly mulled over that, “Maybe I should apologize for not seeing the point while you trained me.”

“I don’t like him. I don’t trust him,” Bruce spoke, his voice dipping into the one Felicity had dubbed his ‘pissed off Batman voice’. He turned to Alfred, “He’s going to get her hurt--seriously hurt, or killed due to his reckless disregard for human life.”

Alfred hummed and met Bruce’s glare head on, “Perhaps, but while Master Tim’s observances on Mr. Queen were based on accurate observations of his skills and tactics, yours are based purely on emotion. Food for thought, Master Bruce.” 

*

“Jason’s alive.”

“So’s Sara and Ray.”

“Sounds like we’ve both been busy,” Bruce remarked.

“Digg’s brother, too. Except he’s being controlled by HIVE. And there’s an immortal man named Vandal Savage who’s trying to track down and murder the reincarnations of his unrequited love interest and her lover.” Felicity told Bruce blankly. “A woman who I know because the Flash’s friend, Vibe, is a metahuman who can see visions about people he’s in contact with.”

“Some of us have been busier than others.” Bruce listened to Felicity’s nervous tapping. “You guys need help?”

“We’ve got our two teams on it. Did I mention that said reincarnated couple is a pair of hawk people?”

“No, you did not.”

“I’m insane, aren’t I? This is all just a fever dream. Because there is no way this is really happening. You knew me before, Bruce. Happier times when I was just an IT girl.” Felicity babbled.

“You’re not insane and you were never just an IT girl.” Bruce told her gently. He listened to her take a deep breath. “Do you need any help?” He repeated, knowing it was probably futile since she’d never accepted his help no matter how many times he’s offered it in the past.

“Nah, keep the bat in your cave. Our teams can handle this.” Felicity murmured. There was the sounds a door opening in the middle of her sentence before an excited voice.

_”Bat!? Smoak, are you tellin’ me that you know the Bat? And you didn’t tell me!?”_

“The Bat is a myth, and if I did, why would I tell you, Ramon? So you could fanboy?” Felicity teased him.

_”Who is he? I have a bet running with Caitlin!”_

_”Come on, Cisco. There’s no way the Bat is Bruce Wayne. It’s preposterous.”_

“Now there’s someone I’ll admit to knowing.” Felicity grinned at their shocked faces. She turned her phone on speaker. “Hear that, Bruce? You aren’t as special as you thought. Please repeat that sentence, Caitlin, his ego needs deflating.”

“My ego is just fine. You’re the only one so far with complaints.” Bruce spoke, an amused smirk in place.

“That’s because if Alfred complains to your face, you’ll pout.” Felicity shot back, making him chuckle.

“Alfred is completely loyal and would never complain about me to you.” Bruce raised a questioning eyebrow up at Alfred.

“Of course I wouldn’t, Miss Felicity, and I do not appreciate this slander against my character.” Alfred told her in a dry tone.

“I believe the exact words were ‘immature, mental ingrate with a hero complex who is bound to get himself killed’.” Felicity replied, just as dryly.

“Miss Felicity, I do believe you are imagining things.”

“But you do agree with my imagined assessment?”

“...It seems that my scones are finished baking and I must leave. It was nice to hear from you again, Miss Felicity. You must visit us some time soon.” Alfred left. Bruce chuckled dryly.

“Stop gossipping about me with my butler, Smoak.” He ordered.

“She can’t help it. Gossip is her second nature. You should see her when the teams get together. Nonstop information grabbing.” Digg teased.

Felicity turned her phone off speaker and raised a warning eyebrow at Digg, who held his hands up in surrender. “Excusing prying voices, my gossipping with your butler is a direct result of you dodging my calls and that one time you gossipped with my mom.”

 _”He knows your mom?”_ Oliver asked in the background. Felicity held up a hand to him and walked away from the party again, his resulting pout enough to cause snickers from the others in the room.

“I’m never going to forget how your mother volunteered the great Felicity Smoak’s weakness after less than five minutes.” Bruce told her.

“Whatever, we both know that that isn’t my greatest weakness.”

“What would you say is?”

“...Naivete, I suppose.” Felicity murmured.

“How’s Diggle?”

“Which one?”

“Both.”

“Digg’s brother is hard to read. John is...he’s coping. Doing his best.”

“Ray?”

“Existential crisis.” Felicity sighed. “Jason?”

“Angry. Sara?”

“Blood thirsty.”

“You?” Bruce asked quietly.

“Overwhelmed, but still fighting. I’ve figured out that I have a lot of people fighting with me.” Felicity smiled softly. “I, of course, won’t forget that you were my first. Billionaire. Dress up in a crazy costume fighting crime. Not like you were the first like- stop laughing at me. I’ll fight you.”

“Careful, if you come to Gotham, you might not be able to leave.” Bruce threw her words from almost a year ago back at her.

“I think I have a reason to come back, now.” Felicity admitted. “How are you doing?”

“I’m alive. And it seems that Catwoman is stealing a cat eye emerald.”

“Again? Shocker. Tell Selena I say hi and that Vigilante Girls Club is getting together soon, so she can’t go to jail.”

“How--”

“Why do you still question these things?” Felicity asked, remembering her meeting with Selena with they were both in Burma--Felicity with Oliver and Selena to steal a cat statue. “If you must know, I saved her life.”

“You, Smoak, are catnip for vigilantes.” Bruce growled. “I’ll call you later.”

“I’ll call you. This might run a couple of days.”

“If you need me--”

“Go! Selena’s probably gone by now!”

*

“Well, hello there, Batman,” Felicity muttered in greeting as she forced open her eyes to see the face of her best friend, looking too big in the small chair next to her hospital bed.

“Felicity,” Bruce fought down the emotions that had threatened to consume him when he’d read the article on the shooting in Star City. “Why the fuck didn’t you call me?”

“I was a bit busy?” Felicity tried. “I knew that you were busy with Kal--”

“You know Superm- why am I still surprised!?” He scrubbed his hand over his face. “Okay, so you knew I was on mission, but Felicity, when you’ve been shot and get paralyzed, I shouldn’t have to hack into your medical records to figure that out.”

“You hacked my medical records? Aw, Bruce, you really do care,” Felicity quipped weakly, her voice a bit slurry and breathless, the sound of it driving home the fact that she was hurt, really hurt this time, and he couldn’t fix it.

“Why would you ever think otherwise?” Bruce whispered gently. Felicity gave Bruce a faltering smile in response. 

“I wouldn’t, I promise.” Felicity answered, reaching over to grab Bruce’s hand. “I’m glad that you’re here.”

“There’s nowhere else I’d rather be.” Bruce promised her. He looked over her small form in the hospital bed and pursed his lips. “I’d offer to take care of your hospital bills for you--”

“But I’d kick your ass if you did.” Felicity raised an eyebrow at him. Bruce let out an amused sigh and looked down at her.

“You scared me,” Bruce squeezed her hand. “If I lost you, Felicity, I don’t know what I’d do.”

“You’d be fine,” She told him sleepily.

“No, but the first thing I’d do would be to kick Queen’s ass for running his team like this.” Bruce growled quietly. “He’s not even here, Felicity.”

She turned away from his hard stare to look over at the window. She opened her mouth to respond, but felt the words dying in her throat.

“Come home, to Gotham,” Bruce asked her, voice raw with emotions. She blinked up at him in surprise. “Be where I can keep you safe, Felicity. Recuperate in Gotham. I know that you said you wanted to stay in Star for Oliver, but he’s not here. You can’t keep sacrificing every part of yourself to this guy while he can’t be bothered to show up. He keeps secrets like they’re collectables and each of those secrets can hurt you.”

“That’s not true,” Felicity shook her head and looked up at him searchingly. “He loves me.”

“It’s not that surprising that he would,” Bruce used his free hand to smooth over Felicity’s hair. “But there’s a point where love just isn’t enough.”

Felicity sniffed thickly, a single tear running down her face. “I appreciate it, Bruce, but I- I can’t just leave him. He needs me.”

Bruce sighed and squeezed her hand gently, barely holding back the words that would make this much too complicated.

_I need you, too._

*

“I just got a save the date in the mail,” Bruce stared numbly down at the small card in his hand.

“Well, you can rip it up. Disregard it entirely.” Felicity told him in a breezy voice. “No more wedding to worry about. I can walk now, though.”

“Felicity?” Bruce asked incredulously, tearing his gaze away from the card to look over at a wall in his study, as if by glaring at it, Felicity would tell him everything he needed to know.

“I figured that I might as well celebrate working extremities by running away. That room at the manor still open for me?” Felicity asked, her voice sounding so forcefully cheery that the anxiety in Bruce chest from looking at the save the date tripled.

“Always, Felicity, but--”

“I promise, I will tell you all about it, probably accidentally and in extreme detail through a babble,” Felicity’s voice cracked slightly. “But I can’t right now, Bruce.”

“I’ll make sure that Alfred has your ice cream in stock.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And it is at this point that the format of the story will change a bit, as it will no longer be "Call Me Maybe" esque and more like throwing canon out of the goddamn window and into a landfill where it fucking belongs.
> 
> SPECIAL THANKS TO JEN THO BECAUSE HALF OF THIS CHAPTER IS BASICALLY HER BEING LIKE //Okay but what if you did this?// AND ME SCREECHING BECAUSE SHE'S SO TALENTED AND NICE
> 
> Fun Fact: If you combine the third and fourth most used words in this chapter you get "I know"


	4. I'm Not Okay But That's Okay

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> they're best friends, fight me.
> 
> once again, special thank to jen for being the real mvp

No matter how many times Felicity visited Wayne Manor, it would still leave her breathless. Not even just the sheer size of it--which Felicity didn’t think she could ever really get over--but also the...regalness. It was an elegant house, one that had been there for generations. The history that surrounded it was also baffling to her. Felicity’s family was a long line of underachievers and survivors, a family tree that didn’t necessarily lend itself to priceless family heirlooms.

However, even the sight of the manor couldn’t really faze her at this point.

No, because at the point, Felicity didn’t know what she was supposed to be feeling. She’d pushed everything to the back of her mind to work the case, had been operated on empty since she’d gotten shot, she’d distracted herself until she had the time to process everything.

Except now she had time and she didn’t want to process everything that had happened. Her life was a shitstorm. She had spent the entirety of the train and taxi rides over to Gotham and then the manor to try and get herself into the right headspace to explain everything to Bruce, but she just…

She couldn’t acknowledge it. Because once she did, it’d be real.

She took a fortifying breath and retrieved her luggage from the back of the taxi. She swung her duffel bag over her shoulder and grabbed her suitcase and looked up at the manor--

And felt none of the usual anxiety that came with looking at something so much bigger than she was. _Well,_ she thought distantly, _that’s one positive side effect of being numb to the world: apathy._

It didn’t take long after she’d rung the bell for Alfred to open the door and give her a warm greeting, “Miss Felicity, it’s nice to see you on your feet once more. Master Bruce said that you’d be visiting, so I prepared your usual room. Would you like me to take you bags for you?”

“Um, yes, please,” Felicity replied shakily as she gave him her luggage. “Thank you, Alfred.”

“You’re very welcome,” Alfred smiled down at her as he ushered her into the entrance way. “I believe Master Bruce is in his cave, if you wish to see him. Have you eaten? I can prepare an early dinner if you’d like.”

“I’m fine, Alfred. I can help you with dinner later, though? And by ‘help’ I mean peel vegetables and boil water since that’s as close to cooking as you’d probably want from me. To be honest, even the ‘boil water’ thing is probably asking a lot given my lack of culinary skills,” she said ruefully.

“I’m sure it’s not that bad, Miss,” Alfred said, his eyes dancing in amusement.

“Oh, it is that bad,” she told him. “My idea of cooking involves a box of cereal and a bowl although I have been known to throw a frozen pizza in the oven once or twice. I still burn it but it’s still usually edible.” She paused, “Most of the time anyway.” The older man smiled at that and she offered one in return, “However, I am an excellent taste-tester and pot-stirrer.”

“Thank you, Miss Felicity; I would be quite honored to have you as my official pot-stirrer and taste-tester,” Alfred smiled once more, his eyes framed by laugh lines that had Felicity feeling more and more relaxed by the minute. “I do believe that Master Bruce has been anxiously awaiting your arrival. Master Tim, as well.”

“I’ll go down to the Batcave and rouse the old bat.” Felicity let out a sigh. “It’s been too long since I’ve seen my best friend.”

“I suggest that you not wait as long for your next visit,” The butler remarked, stopping abruptly when Tim came barrelling down the stairs.

“You’re walking!” Tim exclaimed happily as he hugged Felicity.

“Observant as ever, Master Tim.” Alfred commented dryly. “I will just take your things to your room, then. If you need anything, Miss Felicity, just let me know.” Alfred turned on his heel and left the two of them hugging in the entrance way.

Tim pulled away from Felicity and looked her up and down cautiously, “You’re real, right? I’m not dreaming this?”

“You’re not,” Felicity assured him, gently putting one hand on his shoulder. “My friend, Curtis, he made a biostimulant for me. I didn’t tell you about it because it was a long shot. The physical therapy wasn’t working, I wasn’t regaining any feeling or function of my legs until a few hours ago when I could suddenly walk again.”

“So you decided to come to Gotham to celebrate?” Tim asked before narrowing his eyes at her. “No, you only come to Gotham when something’s wrong. What is it?”

Felicity pulled him forward into a gentle hug. “I need to process everything--and tell Bruce--first, okay?”

“Okay,” Tim relaxed in her hug before stepping back and smiling at her brilliantly. “You know, I’m sorry for whatever had you running all the way to Gotham, but I’m glad you’re here. You make this place...brighter.”

“It’s the hair,” She quipped weakly. “All of you guys have black hair, I’m a speck of blonde in a sea of darkness.”

“Whatever you say, M&M.” Tim chuckled, causing her to pause.

“Since when do you call me M&M?” Felicity raised an eyebrow at the nickname that Dick had adopted for her.

“Since Dick filled me in on why he calls you M&M.” Tim grinned cheekily. 

Shortly after meeting Dick, Felicity had cause to use her Loud Voice on Bruce who, much to the other man’s surprise, immediately capitulated to. He started calling her ‘Mighty Mouse, the Mouse that Roared’ after that, a cumbersome ‘nickname’ that was quickly shortened to ‘M&M’ following a sleepover that involved bowls of M&M’s, the Netflixing of Bones, and an impromptu rap battle that she won hands down.

“I understand the backstory, I was there. I just didn’t expect you to use it. The last time you tried to use a nickname for me, you spent fifteen minutes arguing with yourself.”

Tim blushed. “I wanted to make sure I got something that fit you as a person and not some lame cop out like ‘Lis’.”

“Hey, my mom calls me ‘Lis’. I like that nickname, thank you very much.” Felicity ruffled his hair. “Okay, Timmy, sorry to cut this short--”

“But I’m not the best friend that you need to talk to so badly that you took a five hour train?” Tim batted her hand away. “He’s in the cave, pouting.”

“Why is he pouting?”

“Because you called him saying that you were on your way to Gotham due to oh-so-vague circumstances and then hung up.” He shrugged. “He worries because he cares, M&M.”

Felicity smiled faintly and nodded. “I get that. I’ll just go to see him, then.”

“Stay around for a while.” Tim requested lightly as she walked away. “You make him happier when you’re here. Even when it’s because of something hinky on your end.”

“I’m happier when I’m here, too.” Felicity replied.

“Then stay forever,” Tim said with a shrug. “You’d be doing us a favor; having you around makes Bruce almost bearable.”

*

“This place does not change, does it?” Felicity asked as she walked out into the middle of the Batcave. “Except for your souvenirs, I guess. Always getting more of those. Which reminds me, I might’ve stolen part of a magical idol from Team Arrow that needs a secure location, so I thought I’d leave it down here.”

Bruce turned away from the microscope he was glaring at to observe his friend as she _walked_ over to him. He felt the anxiety in his chest lessen at the sight of her on her feet, tension draining from his shoulders. He leaned against the lab table he was using and crossed his arms over his chest--comfortable just watching Felicity as she lit up the otherwise dreary cave.

“That is, of course, if you’re okay with it,” Felicity started gesticulating as one of her infamous babbles started up. “The piece is harmless on its own. In fact, unless it’s whole, the idol is useless. That’s why I took the piece. Not to say that I don’t trust Ol- the team to keep the idol safe, but I mean--let’s be honest, it just isn’t smart to keep it all together. Digg took one piece, too, but that was part of a plan. I might’ve stolen this piece without telling anyone. The less people who know the better, though, right? Not like keeping secrets from your team is a good idea, in fact I just broke off an engagement because of secrets--”

Bruce raised his eyebrows as his amused expression shifted to that of concern.

“--which I would of course spill the minute I came down here.” Felicity bit her lips and closed her eyes as she mentally berated herself. She moved forward to stand in front of Bruce before looking up at him. “I guess I just...I really need to talk to my best friend.”

Bruce moved forward and wrapped his arms around her waist without saying a word--just needing to making sure that she was solid and _real_. She relaxed against him and returned his embrace, wrapping her arms around his neck tightly. “I’m always here to listen to you, Felicity.”

“God, I have so much to tell you,” Felicity sniffed. “I’m so sorry for not calling after everything in the hospital. I know you were trying to help, but every time I wanted to call, I could just hear you telling me ‘I told you so’ over and over.”

Bruce squeezed Felicity too his chest tighter before letting her go, “I may have been…”

“An ass?” Felicity suggested.

“A bit harsh,” Bruce continued without acknowledging her interruption. “But it was because I was scared of losing you. You got shot. You could’ve died, Felicity.”

She scraped her hands over her face and worked to keep back the flood of tears that had been threatening to overcome her since he’d pulled her into the hug. “I know. I was...it was rough, just trying to figure out how to- how to go on, you know? How to keep fighting. Because even when I wasn’t calling you, it was still your voice in my head, telling me not to give up. I was working so hard, spreading myself so thin. I was trying to prove to myself that I could still be a functioning member of the team and run Ray’s company and be the person I was before, but- God, Bruce, I was so tired.”

 _“I’m so tired, Bruce. I’m so tired of fighting.”_ The words from nearly two years ago echoed through Bruce’s mind.

“That’s when you’re supposed to rely on the people around you,” Bruce told her gently.

“I know,” Felicity nodded, her hands moving around as she made wild gestures to match her words. “Logically, I knew that, but it just- it felt like if I called you, if I accepted yours or Digg’s or Thea’s or Oli-Oliver’s help--it would be admitting defeat. I wanted to be able to heal by myself. To be independent.”

“Why did you need to be alone to be independent?” Bruce asked in a quiet voice.

“I don’t-” Felicity started before looking down. “I don’t know. And then, just when I was starting to feel like myself again, my _dad_ showed up--”

“Your dad?” Bruce interrupted in an alarmed voice.

“Yeah. A bad guy. My dad is a bad guy hacker who goes by the handle ‘the Calculator’ and tried to steal tech information from my company when I tried to give him a chance to be my family,” Felicity brushed a tear off of her cheek, studiously avoiding Bruce’s gaze. “I mean, this man abandoned my mother and me when I was just a kid. I was too young to remember much about him except for how much it hurt. That I wasn’t enough for him. I hated myself and my mom for so long because I thought that it was my fault.

“Then, as if the damn universe sensed that I was starting to get a good handle on my situation, Noah appears. Out of nowhere. Just, poof! Hello! And I gave him a shot,” Felicity rolled her eyes and scoffed at herself. “I told you: my greatest weakness if my naivete.”

“That’s not how I see it,” Bruce murmured in a low, comforting voice. Felicity looked up at him in surprise. “The way I see it, you’d been irreparably hurt by this man, but you were still willing to give him a shot--to love him and believe in him, despite everything--because you love harder than anyone I know. You don’t deal in half measures, so when you let yourself believe he could’ve changed, it hurt that much more. But your strength comes from the fact that you still gave him a chance.”

“I should’ve saved myself the pain,” Felicity murmured. “My mother was right: people don’t change.”

“No,” Bruce agreed. “They don’t. But they can learn.”

Felicity let out an exhausted sigh and leaned forward to rest her forehead against Bruce’s shoulder.

“Was your dad why you broke off the engagement?” Bruce questioned in that low voice. He carefully avoided using Queen’s name, noting how she’d dodged the name--stumbling over it when she had to use it. Felicity shook her head and took a deep, centering breath before dropping the cause of death for her relationship.

“He has a son.” She whispered, pulling away from Bruce shoulder to look up at him. “Oliver has a son that he kept a secret from me. He wanted to marry me-- _marry_ , not date--and he kept his _son_ a secret from me.”

Bruce clenched his jaw in anger as he remembered the conversation he’d had with Tim and Alfred about Queen and all of his damn secrets. How much those secrets were going to hurt Felicity.

“William--that’s his son’s name, by the way. William’s mom, Samantha, she didn’t want Oliver to tell anyone about him. Which, I get. I get it. Feeling like you need to hide from the spotlight. But I was his fiancée. And it wasn’t even- I didn’t end it because he had a kid. I love kids. I haven’t always trusted myself with them, but being around Jason, Tim, and little Sara, I started getting more confident about them, you know? But I just- the secrets, the lies, the- the deals. I can’t deal with that in a fucking relationship. So much of my life is lived in the shadows, I just want to be able to be happy in a relationship built on honesty and communication.

“And, maybe I would’ve forgiven Oliver,” Felicity’s eyes flicked back down to the floor. “I know it wouldn’t have been the right thing for myself, but he had all of the right excuses. Then...then he abandoned them. Sent them away. Without even talking to me about it. He talked to Digg and Vixen--when he was confused and wanted guidance, he turned to his best friend and an orphan. But he made the decision--a decision to abandon his child--without uttering a word about it to me, the only person on the team who was abandoned by their father. It just drove it all home. Oliver might love me, but he doesn’t trust me. Not with the things that matter. And it hurt, so much. Watching him making a video to William explaining everything. The same damn ‘it’s for your own protection’ speech that my mom would try to tell me about my dad. I just...it all shattered. Every bit of trust I had in him.”

Bruce watched as Felicity clenched her fists, tear drops echoing in the cave as they hit the floor between the two friends. Bruce pulled Felicity into his arms, wrapping her in his own protective embrace. As if he could stop the world from hurting her anymore. She melted against him, tears that she’d been fighting tooth and nail for months breaking through. Sobs shook her body as she mourned the future she’d finally allowed herself to believe in.

“I’ve got you,” Bruce whispered gently in her ear. She nodded against his chest and held tightly to his shirt as she cried. “Let it all out, I’ve got you.”

Felicity couldn’t tell how long they stood together until she’d gotten herself under control. She pulled away and wiped her tears onto her sleeve, making Bruce laugh at her.

“Sorry that I sobbed all over your shirt,” Felicity gestured to Bruce’s t-shirt, which was now stained with mascara and tears and maybe a little bit of snot. Bruce laughed lightly and shrugged.

“Small price to pay to be able to comfort my best friend. Who was paralyzed the last time I saw her,” Bruce pointed out. “Tell me you didn’t go for a swim in the lazarus pit.”

“Hmm? No, Nyssa sabotaged that,” Felicity waved her hand dismissively.

“There’s more than one,” Bruce pointed out, making Felicity stop and look up at him in surprise. “You didn’t know?”

“No! What do- you know what? Problem for another day,” Felicity held up her hands and shrugged. “Anyway, I can again because of Curtis Holt. He invented a biostimulant that we placed into my spine. At first, we kinda thought it was a bust--which is one of the reasons I didn’t call you immediately--because even with physical therapy, I wasn’t making much progress. Which reminds me, I need to find a physical therapist in Gotham. Or I could join yoga or pilates. Strength training. I didn’t lose much muscle mass.”

“You could always work out with me,” Bruce offered, a wry grin on his face. Felicity raised one eyebrow and let out a dry laugh.

“Very funny, Wayne, but I don’t hate myself that much.” She took a deep breath and look around the cave. “Oh yeah!” She reached into her pocket and produced a curved piece of stone with lines engraved into it. “Souvenir!”

“You were being serious about that,” Bruce clenched his jaw slightly. Though he hadn’t phrased it as a question, Felicity found herself nodding slightly. “You stole a piece of a dangerous idol that multiple groups of people will be after--without any backup or letting anyone know?”

Felicity pursed her lips into a slight pout and looked up at Bruce.

“Stop looking at me like that,” Bruce snapped before sighing heavily. “I’ll take care of it.”

“My hero,” She grinned up at him. He sighed and rolled his eyes, a smile pulling at the corners of his mouth.

“You’re something else, Smoak.” Bruce shook his head.

“Careful, moose, I’ll fight you,” Felicity wriggled her eyebrows, playfully punching his shoulder.

“Careful yourself,” Bruce grinned and poked at her hip. “I know your weakness.”

Felicity narrowed her up at him. “I know yours.”

“Bullshit,” Bruce shot back. Felicity raised her eyebrows and cocked her head to the side. “I have no weakness.”

“Yet here I am,” Felicity shrugged in a ‘what can you do’ type of gesture. “The gatekeeper of all of your secrets--including your weaknesses.”

“Weaknesses? As in plural?” Bruce asked incredulously.

“Why yes, Mr. Wayne. You’ve got your detective hat on today!” Felicity quipped. Bruce grinned down at her, the mischievous face showing him just how much she’d started feeling like herself again.

“I’ll show you detective,” He grumbled and reached out to poke at her hip viciously. Felicity yelped and danced away from him, warm laughter echoing through the cave.

*

After dinner and patrol, Bruce knocked softly on the door to Felicity’s room. He stepped in at her tired call and sat on the foot of her bed, where she was sitting up, working on something on her tablet.

“Bruce,” Felicity smiled softly at him and put her tablet on her bedside table. “Is everything okay?”

“Everything’s fine,” Bruce reassured her, patting her thigh through the comforter that she had pulled over her legs. “How are you doing?”

“I’m screaming on the inside,” Felicity admitted. “I think...for now, I’m done being weepy. I’m trying to...work to distract myself. You think I could open a branch of Palmer Tech here in Gotham? Strategically, it’d be a gamble. The market here is pretty good, most of our competitors--like you--are stationed here, so it’d make sense. But the company is still feeling the pain of moving to Starling and Ray ‘dying’.”

“I think that if I need to, I’ll buy your company to keep you here,” Bruce nudged her leg until she folded them to give Bruce enough space to sit comfortably next to her.

“That would be fun. A merger with you and me on opposing sides?” Felicity gave him a small, amused smile. “I think both Sara and my mother would want the negotiations on video.”

“I’ll give you the same offer I gave you in college,” Bruce smirked.

“Whatever the hell I want?”

“I stand by it.”

Felicity tilted her head to the side and gave him a tired smile. “What are you gonna do the day I take you up on that offer and ask you to do something you don’t want to do?”

“If you’re doing the asking, I don’t see how I wouldn’t want to do it.” Bruce shrugged. 

“What if…” Felicity’s lips quirked upward in a small smile. “I turned evil.”

“I don’t think there’s any way in the known universe that you could be evil,” Bruce raised an eyebrow. “But if you were, you’d have the Dark Knight protecting you for as long as you’d let him.”

“What if I had amnesia and couldn’t remember you?”

“I’d make new memories with you.”

“What if I got really ugly?” Felicity bit her bottom lip to keep herself from laughing.

“I don’t think there’s a single part of you that I could ever find ugly,” Bruce shot back.

“What if I asked you to run a thousand miles?”

“I’d get started immediately.”

“What if it was up a slight incline?”

“Deal breaker,” Bruce shook his head in mock seriousness, making Felicity laugh lightly. She leaned her forehead against Bruce’s shoulder while she giggled, the happy sounds sending Bruce’s heart soaring.

“What if I asked you to stay in here until I fell asleep because I’ve been afraid of being alone since the night I got shot?” Felicity asked in a small voice once she’d quieted down. Bruce wrapped an arm around her shoulders and moved to lean against her headboard with her tiny form pressed against his side in a purely platonic cuddle.

“I’d get comfortable.” Bruce answered easily.

“You’re a good friend, Bruce Wayne.” Felicity smiled against his chest.

“I have a t-shirt that says the same thing.”

“You kept that?” Felicity smiled up at him.

“Of course I did,” Bruce grinned down at her. “It was a gift from my best friend.”

*

Felicity moved closer into warmth of her pillow as awareness threatened the comfortable bliss of being unconscious. She nuzzled her face into the pillow and breathed deeply. Fuck, it smelled good. And it was shaking. Why was her pillow shaking? Well, that sounded like the answer to a question that one would need to be awake to figure out, so she did what any good investigator would.

She closed her eyes tighter and moved her face so that the light from the window wouldn’t bother her.

“Felicity,” Her pillow laughed and nudged at her.

“Mmm, no.” Felicity answered decisively.

“I have to go. And you have to get up, too.” Her pillow sounded a lot like Bruce, which was relaxing in a way. She tightened her hold around his waist and shook her head.

“Never. Waking. Up.” She groaned.

Bruce laughed against her, but--thankfully--quieted down. That is, until she felt his fingers tap her hip warningly.

“You wouldn’t dare,” She turned her chin against his chest to look up at him warningly. “I’ll fuck you up, bat boy.” Bruce raised both eyebrows at the threat--which probably would’ve sounded a hell of a lot more potent if her voice wasn’t so heavy with sleep that it sounded as if she’d had some of Digg’s special aspirins.

Instead of responding verbally, Bruce ran his fingers over Felicity’s hip lightly. She jerked away from the touch, rolling to the other side of the bed. 

“Fuck you, Wayne.” She growled.

Bruce laughed and leaned over her to press a kiss to her forehead. “You need to wake up, soon. Alfred is making breakfast.” He slid off of her bed and made his way to the door.

“Bruce?” Felicity asked in a small voice.

“Felicity?” He turned to look at her, smiling at her tiny form in the middle of the huge bed.

“Thank you for all of this.” Felicity spoke softly.

“Any time.” Bruce whispered as he left the room.

*

The first morning Felicity was there was the first time Bruce witnessed her CEO persona. He was sitting at a nook in the family kitchen as Alfred finished cooking up waffles for everyone when she breezed in. Her hair was pulled out of her face into a sharp bun to match the professional look of her pencil skirt, button up shirt, and heels. She was on the phone, but grinned at her happily when he looked up at her over his newspaper.

“Yes, Curtis,” She rolled her eyes at whatever was said on the other end of the line. “I’m aware that I’m running late, but honestly, it was jet lag.”

Bruce watched her as she smiled brilliantly at Alfred when he’d set down a plate with two waffles for her. She mouthed a ‘thank you’ and moved past Alfred to the refrigerator where she retrieved a bottle of water and an orange.

“Okay, you cannot ask me to do that! Yes, yes, possible side effects, yada yada.” Felicity huffed. “Holt, I’ve been on one or two working binges in my time, I know what it sounds like when you’re running on caffeine. I’m warning you, you’re going to work yourself sick.”

She began peeling her orange and sat down across from Bruce. He felt an almost giddy sense of intimacy at the domestic feel of it all. Then Felicity reached across the table and grabbed his mug of coffee. Raising her eyebrows in a challenge as she took a sip, she left behind a bright pink lipstick stain. Alfred shook his head and muttered something about children before leaving the kitchen.

“See? That sneeze? That sneeze was the universe telling you to listen to your boss.” Felicity dodged Bruce’s first attempt at the mug, turning her back on him. “Look, I know that the board wants to attach a price tag to this thing ASAP, but you, my dear sweet genius, just need to get some rest. I’ll handle them, so don’t worry about me.”

Bruce stood from his seat and grabbed the mug, holding it up above his head while Felicity glared at him. 

“Yes, Curtis, you will always be my battle buddy in the corporate war against greed, now go. Home.” Felicity ordered before hanging up the phone, her gaze going from Bruce to his mug. “Don’t for a second think I won’t climb you like a tree.”

Bruce raised his eyebrows and grinned down at Felicity as she winced and covered her face. “My brain thinks of the worst ways to say things.”

“Good morning to you, too.” Bruce joked as he finished off his coffee and put the empty mug down on the table. “First you won’t let me out of your bed, now you want to climb me like a tree? Someone could get the wrong idea, Smoak.”

“Shut up,” Felicity groaned as she started in on her waffles.

“What are you running late for?” Bruce asked, sitting back down to finish reading the newspaper.

Felicity finished chewing her bite and started waving her hands around as she told him about how her board had demanded a meeting on how they’d market the biostimulant to the masses, or in other words, how many zeroes they could add to the end of the price tag. Felicity was going to be skyping in, but she was stalling as much as possible because she felt that the stimulant should be readily available for people of all backgrounds.

“It just frustrates me,” Felicity sighed down at her waffles. “Half of my board hates me for being a woman and the other half hates me for being compassionate. They’re all driven by their own egos and greed.”

“Welcome to the corporate world.” Bruce chuckled humorlessly.

“I know, I know. Talk less, smile more. Never let them know what you’re against and what you’re for.” Felicity waved her hand dismissively. “But I’m way more of a Hamilton than a Burr! I mean, I’d never cheat, but the whole needing to take a stance on things. I can’t be wishy washy and I can’t keep quiet!”

Bruce narrowed his eyes questioningly. “I’m not following the metaphor, but I think I understand.”

“You really date yourself when you read newspapers and refuse to participate in modern pop culture.” Felicity leveled her fork at Bruce. “Which is sad, because I think you’d really like Hamilton. It’s nerdy as fuck, I’m sure you’d appreciate that.”

“Did _you_ just call _me_ a nerd?” Bruce raised an eyebrow. Felicity nodded smugly.

“What’cha gonna do about it?”

“Well, first I’m--” Bruce started, but was cut off by Felicity’s phone ringing She frowned at the contact before giving Bruce an apologetic look and accepting the call.

“Thea, what’s up?” Felicity greeted. “Yes, well, that might be because I’m not at work. I’m not even in Star right now. I’m in Gotham...Yes, well-...I didn’t mean to make you worry, Speedy. I’m not coming back, but I can get your friend an interview. Alright. Yes, I’ll check in. Hey, I might not be there anymore, but you’re still like a little sister to me. If you need anything--anything at all--I will personally make Bruce Wayne do it.”

Bruce rolled his eyes, but grinned. He could see a part of Felicity that had been anxious, relaxing because of whatever Thea was saying. Felicity grinned and said goodbye before hanging up. 

“Sorry, Bruce, what were you threatening?” Felicity asked cheekily.

“I’m kicking you out,” Bruce spoke dryly. “I can’t believe I hounded you to visit for so long.”

“You loooove me,” Felicity sang in a teasing tone. “You like being arooouuuund me.”

“Maybe,” Bruce deflected as he smiled gently at her from across the table.

“I’m your beeest friend,” She continued.

“Stop, I admit it. You’re my best friend and I like having you around,” Bruce shook his head. “Happy?”

“Getting there, yeah.” Felicity raised an eyebrow. “Though, I’d be happier if you would’ve let me take your coffee.”

“Don’t you have a board to terrorize?” Bruce raised his eyebrows at her.

Felicity shot up from her seat in hurry. “Shit, yeah. I can’t leave them alone for too long or they’ll vote me out. Can I use your study?”

Bruce nodded. “Give them hell.”

“You bet’cha.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> bye bye canon. it was nice knowing you. it wasn't, actually. u kinda sucked.
> 
> HELLO BATLICITY, IT WILL BE NICE KNOWING YOU
> 
> Fun Fact: the word Felicity is used more than Bruce in this chapter, and this is the only chapter so far to have eyebrow as a frequently used word.


	5. Settling In

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mostly filler. Felicity and Bruce starting to integrate their lives together. A brief look into life in Star City.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *laughs nervously* hey guys
> 
> sorry for disappearing for a while. writer's block is a bitch and this whole story was written to battle it so when I got writer's block for this story, shit spiraled. not to mention standardized testing has been kicking my ass. #thanksobama
> 
> I'm sorry if this chapter is a little awkward. it's late and I don't wanna bother Jen so it is unbeta'd and mostly filler.

“Hey, you okay?” Tim asked as he peeked into Bruce’s study to find their blonde guest mumbling to herself and typing like the keyboard had personally offended her. “You holed up here and we haven’t seen you in a few hours, so I wanted to see if you were still alive.”

“I’m fine, Tim.” Felicity sighed. “I’m working. Being a big important CEO.”

Tim nodded and watched as Felicity pushed her chair away from the desk and scraped her hands over her face. He stepped inside of the office and closed the door, figuring that she needed someone to talk to. “Well, according to you, you were basically running QC back when you were He-Who-Shall-Not-Be-Named’s assistant. And you didn’t work for hours on end back then.”

“You see, that was different.” Felicity bit her lip and looked over the screen in front of her before focusing back on Tim. “Back then, if I failed, it wouldn’t have been my fault. Plus, there wasn’t a lot that I could do to actually, you know, hurt QC. It was already in a bad place. Now, I-” Felicity tailed off and blew out a frustrated breath.

“So is that what’s bugging you? You’d be blamed for the mistakes you make?” Tim furrowed his eyebrows in disbelief. That didn’t sound like the Felicity Smoak he knew. His suspicions were proven correct when Felicity shook her head reluctantly.

“No, it’s not that. I have a bit of an issue with blaming myself, so I know that if I made a mistake running QC, I would’ve felt just as shitty.” Felicity leaned back in her chair and looked at Tim searchingly. “It’s just that...running Palmer Tech means protecting Ray’s legacy. Every decision I make, I feel this weight of ‘what would Ray think of this?’ I know it’s stupid, he’s not even really dead, but…”

“It feels like you’re drowning in the expectations that have been set for you,” Tim nodded in understanding. Felicity cocked her head to the side and gave him a questioning look. “M&M, I am the third Robin. I know a thing or two about feeling smothered by a title.”

Realization dawned on Felicity as she smiled wryly at him. “How do you deal with it?”

“I wanted it.” Tim told Felicity earnestly. “I asked for this. You were swindled into it.”

Felicity’s nose scrunched up as she remembered how she’d became the CEO of Palmer Tech. “You have a point there. Still, do you have any advice?”

Tim moved his head from side to side as he thought. “The first thing I did as Robin was make the title my own. I did things my way. I wore my own uniform. I was Robin 3.0 but I refused to let that change how I operated. I didn’t try to be Dick or Jason, I made my own decisions.”

“So I shouldn’t worry about protecting Ray’s legacy?” Felicity furrowed her eyebrows in thought.

“Palmer gave you his company. He obviously trusts you.” Tim pointed out. “You’ve proven yourself to be a capable friend to him time and time again. Palmer’s legacy is made of the lives he’s touched and the things he’s invented. Maybe you should focus on your own legacy.”

Felicity wore a considering expression as she looked passed Tim, her mind obviously wandering.

“And you should consider it over dinner because you missed lunch and Alfred gets testy when people skip consecutive meals.”

“Shit, I didn’t even realize it was dinner time.” Felicity rubbed her eyes and stood. She saved her work and smiled down at Tim. “Thanks for the talk, Tim.”

“No problem, Mouse.” Tim grinned up at her. “Bruce isn’t the only one who can be your friend.”

*

“Hey, Bruce?” Felicity called as she walked over to the center console in the Bat Cave. Bruce was frowning at one of the screens, his elbow on the table as he held his chin--a tell that Felicity had realized a long time ago meant that he was thinking hard about something. “What’cha workin on?”

“Clayface’s cellular structure. I’m preparing for our next run in.” Bruce looked away from the screen to give her a small smile. “You here to check out Watchtower?”

“No,” She lied smoothly. “I came down to see my best friend.”

“Your best friend?”

“Yes, your computer and I are quite close,” Felicity smiled innocently at him. “I know all of their weaknesses and I make them better.”

Bruce chuckled and stood from the chair. “Can you run our comms tonight? It should be a quiet night, but I like to be prepared.”

“No, you? Prepared?” She drawled sarcastically as she sat down and started typing. “That sounds completely out of character.”

“Yeah, well I guess compared to Team Arrow, my going off half cocked would look like a thorough battle strategy.” Bruce shot back, raising a single eyebrow.

Felicity snorted and nodded. “You make a good point. And that’s a yes, by the way, to running your comms. I can upgrade your security while I’m at it, because, let’s be honest, it’s a joke.”

“My cyber security is top of the line.” He grumbled as he turned away from the screens to give her a dirty look. “You’re the only one capable of getting through it.”

“That you know of. Also, I’ve met my fair share of hackers with skills equivalent to mine.” Felicity pointed out. “Not to mention, I’ve gotten through your firewalls while I was drunk, B. Drunk.”

“Why were you hacking me while you were drunk?”

“Don’t get caught up in the details here.”

Bruce shook his head and let out a half annoyed, half amused sigh. “It was part of your whole Girl’s Club that none of us are supposed to know about, wasn’t it?”

“I don’t know, was it?” Felicity cocked her head and gave him an innocent look.

“I seem to remember you being a bad liar.” Bruce narrowed his eyes at her.

“Memory is always one of the first things to go.” Felicity gave him a mock sympathetic look. “Don’t worry, I’ll make sure you stay comfortable.”

“I’m 36, Felicity.” Bruce flicked her shoulder lightly. “I’m nowhere near old enough to put up with this kind of teasing.”

“You’re a decade older than me and, really, that’s all I need.” Felicity grinned. “Now, Batman, go get suited up so I can finally see you in full cosplay.”

“You’ve seen me as Batman before.”

“That doesn’t count. I was in shock that night.”

Bruce rolled his eyes and ignored her. “The first time you met the Batman, you yelled at him.”

“That’s because I too tired to deal with a measuring contest.” Felicity grumbled, earning an offended look from Bruce. “I yelled at Ra’s the first time I met him, too.”

Bruce looked at her with wide eyes. “You’re joking.”

“Nope. I threatened to go to war with him.” Felicity looked up at him, letting him read the honesty of her face. He scraped a hand over his face and breathed out a heavy breath.

“If I do start aging prematurely, it’s your fault.” He decided.

*

“I will sell you my soul and my company for a foot massage,” Felicity announced as she collapsed into a seat in Bruce’s office. She’d spent her fifth day in Gotham meeting with real estate agents and trying to manage the logistics of opening of Gotham branch of Palmer Tech. Bruce looked up from his paperwork to give her a small smile.

“Hello to you, too.” He quipped and marked a paragraph in the packet that he was reading. “I thought women liked shopping.”

“ _That_ was not shopping. Shopping done right is something you do with your friends for fun and focuses more on bonding than achieving a set goal--an activity both men and women can enjoy, thank you very much.” Felicity corrected him as she sat up in her chair and slipped off her killer heels (so called because they were killing her). “This was an exercise in the mundane. I never wanted to be a damn CEO. If Ray wasn’t off tracking Savage through time, I’d kill him.”

“Can’t you take some time off to focus on recovering from being paralyzed? It’s probably not wise to be pushing yourself so quickly after regaining movement.” Bruce pointed out, earning a sour look from Felicity.

“You sound like Curtis. ‘Don’t drink coffee’, ‘get eight hours of sleep’, ‘exercise at least half an hour a day’, ‘take a break’.” Felicity grumbled. “I can’t take a break, because that would be showing my board weakness. I’m fighting them all tooth and nail as it is, I can’t give them any plausible explanation for wanting to vote me out. Mr. Dennis already tried to call a super secret meeting in Star to try to make it seem like I was going on some vacation because I’m an emotional woman who can’t handle a damn breakup.”

Bruce furrowed his eyebrows. “Wait, you’re not supposed to be drinking coffee?”

“Not the point.”

Bruce rolled his eyes. “Felicity, you’re working yourself too hard.”

“Isn’t that ironic?” She sung under her breath, but was ignored.

“You need to properly recover from major surgery and then figure out everything that’s changed because of it. Don’t think I haven’t noticed that you’ve been having back and head pain. These are things that could either be attributed to exhaustion or as a side effect of the biostimulant. We can’t be sure, though, because you’ve been going nonstop since you got here. Take a break. Take a week and take care of yourself. That’s my advice.” Bruce told her gently, not wanting a repeat of the hospital when he’d been too harsh and almost ended up losing her.

Felicity looked at him searchingly before sighing. “I can take three days--that’s how long the real estate agent said it would take to find some feasible property. But, I’m not giving up coffee and I’m still helping you with your side project. Also, you’re not allowed to tell Alfred about the possible side effects, Wayne, or I swear to God, I will drain your accounts.”

Bruce chuckled, just as immune to her threats as she was immune to his sunny disposition. “Agreed, if you let me help with your daily exercise.”

“Hell no.”

“You need to build up your strength again,” Bruce spoke in a patient tone. “And I need to know that you can take care of yourself now that you’re a part of my night life. Actually, forget that, I need to know that you can take care of yourself because you make me worry more than raising three kids ever did.”

Felicity looked away, remorse pulling at her features before she could hide them. “I...yeah, you helping me sounds smart.”

“I just don’t want you to get hurt again.” Bruce whispered gently. Felicity looked up at him again and gave him a wry smile.

“Well then it’s good I have you to be my hero, huh?” She joked weakly before blushing lightly. “Not my hero like you’re _mine_ but--”

“As much as I’d love to listen to you babble,” Bruce cut her off. “I think you’ve suffered enough today.”

Felicity gave him a grateful look. “Okay, now that we’ve gotten the unexpected emotion talk out of our systems, are you free for lunch? Your secretary said you had a light day when she let me in, but if you’re busy with paperwork, I’ll just explore some on my own.”

“I think I can spare an hour or two.” Bruce closed the packet he’d been reading before Felicity had breezed in. “Do you have anything in mind?”

“Food.” Felicity told in a mock serious voice.

“Right, should’ve expected that.” Bruce chuckled and stood. “You know, if we’re going out to eat, you’re gonna have to put on your shoes.”

“Or,” Felicity raised her hand in the universal ‘wait’ gesture. “You could give me a piggy back ride.”

“You’re wearing a dress.”

“I love that your only complaint is the logistic part.” Felicity grinned brilliantly. “It fills my heart with indescribable joy to know that you’d walk around downtown Gotham with me on your back for every half bit pap to make a pretty penny off of.”

Bruce lightly shoved Felicity’s shoulder. “My best friend is finally in the same city as me without some earth shattering event happening. No paparazzi could possibly bring me down.”

Felicity pulled her shoes back on and stood with a put upon groan. She snaked her arm through his and smiled up at him. “You say the sweetest things. I’m onto you, bat boy. You act all tough and emotionless, but you’re a giant teddy bear.”

“You can’t let word get out,” Bruce raised his eyebrows and smirked down at her as he started leading her out of his office and to the elevator. “I have a reputation to protect.” Felicity snorted and raised a hand to wave at his secretary, Jesse, as they passed by her desk.

“Make it worth my wild.”

“I will take you to a decent sushi restaurant,” Bruce offered. “And I won’t let anyone know that you’re grumpy in the morning if you don’t get a good amount of hugs.”

Felicity pursed her lips in mock consideration. They stepped onto the elevator and Bruce pressed the button for the ground floor, knowing that despite her complaints, Felicity needed the exercise of walking the quarter mile to the restaurant. She studied his face closely, spurring him into giving her a mock Bat Glare. She sighed heavily to cover the smile that started overtaking her features. “I guess that’d be a fair deal.”

“Should I be worried that our relationship revolves around mutually assured destruction?” Bruce asked sarcastically.

“Probably,” Felicity answered in the same tone. “Worried but not surprised. We did, after all, meet when I hacked you. Twice. Which reminds me, I’ve always wondered, but never thought to ask: how come it took you so long to come and feel me out?” She closed her eyes as her words processed in her mind. “3...2...1…”

Bruce laughed lightly and shook his head at her in amusement. “I guess there’s no shame in admitting it. I didn’t realize I’d been hacked for about a month, even then I only stumbled across a stray bit of code that you wrote to strengthen my firewall. It took me a while to track you down. I got your general location and had to figure out who at MIT was that skilled. I reached out to MIT as Bruce Wayne, asking for their best to help me test my firewall, and they gave me a list of their top ten students. 

“From there, it was a matter of figuring out who’d be curious enough to find my code in the GCPD files while also having a sense of morality strong enough to fix damage that they’d done.” Bruce shrugged. “It was easy to narrow it down once I’d done research on you, but it still took me a week to figure it out. After all, you used a different coding strategy for school assignments than hacking. It was smart.”

The elevator opened and the two stepped into the lobby. Bruce noted that Felicity smiled warmly at the security. Was there anyone in his building who wasn’t already completely enamored with her? 

“So what made you decided to recruit me instead of threatening me into submission?” Felicity cocked her head to the side.

Bruce pursed his lips and gave her a searching look. “There’s something about you, Felicity. I don’t know how to describe it, but...there’s this undisputable goodness in you. I had been debating what to do with you since I realized that you hadn’t just hacked me but decided to help me out, but after a minute with you, I wanted to keep you close. Maybe it was my protective instinct--not that I don’t think you can handle yourself. I just had this feeling that I could trust you.”

Felicity nodded. “I felt the same way once I got over my nervousness. I mean, not the protectiveness. I didn’t think that I could actually help you because of everything that had happened with Cooper, but talking to you was the highlight of some really bad days. I always knew that I could trust you. And not the other guy. You.”

Not knowing what to say, Bruce unwinded his arm from hers to wrap it around her shoulders affectionately. “You were the best part of my days, too.”

Felicity looked up at him with an unreadable expression before resting her head against his shoulder. “Like I said: teddy bear.”

“Only around you,” Bruce whispered as they walked together.

*

“Why didn’t anyone tell me that Felicity knew Bruce Wayne?” Thea asked as she came down to the lair with Laurel to find Oliver brooding and Digg trying to make sense of the computers. 

Digg looked up at her and gave her a small smile as he recalled the friendship between their missing IT girl and Gotham’s favorite vigilante. “I honestly forgot that you two weren’t there when we met him.”

“I thought she was just joking about knowing him because she was in Gotham,” Thea huffed out an amused breath. “Then I saw the pictures of them and wow.”

“What pictures?” Oliver asked, eyes furrowing in confusion. Thea rolled her eyes and moved over to the computer to bring up a Gotham gossip article revolving around Felicity and Bruce.

“Wow is right.” Laurel raised her eyebrows at the man next to her friend in the pictures. “They are...really close.”

“He’s her best friend.” Digg told them. “They met while she was in MIT. She hacked him.”

Laurel smirked in amusement while Thea barked out a laugh. Oliver, Laurel, and Digg all studied the pictures in the article.

“It’s nice to see that she’s smiling,” Laurel remarked softly. 

“And walking,” Thea pointed out. “Even people who’ve had complete control of their legs all of their lives wouldn’t brave those shoes. But there she is. Looking fabulous and ready to bring the world to its knees. Talk about a power couple.”

“They’re not together,” Digg rolled his eyes before glancing at Oliver in concern.

“Twenty bucks says that they do get together before the end of the year.” Thea looked at Laurel challengingly.

“You’re on.” Laurel narrowed her eyes at Thea. “Guys and girls can just be friends, Thea.”

“Not when they look at each other like _that_.” Thea pointed to the screen where Bruce was looking down at Felicity with a soft expression and she was looking up at him, slightly startled, but happy. “That kind of expression means that they’re already half in love with each other.”

“At least if she was with Bruce,” Laurel mused. “She wouldn’t have to deal with the crazy vigilante life.”

Digg snorted in amusement. “Sorry, I keep forgetting that you guys weren’t there.” Both girls gave him confused glares that would’ve made Felicity proud. “Bruce Wayne is Batman.”

Thea and Laurel looked at each other in shock.

“Oh my god, she really does have a type.” Laurel cracked up. Thea shook her head in amazement. Both her and Laurel moved away from the center of the lair to start their training, both also studiously ignoring Oliver’s brooding silence.

“You okay, man?” Digg asked softly.

“I lost her.” Oliver pursed his lips and shook his head. “I don’t think I’ll be okay for a while.”

“I guess seeing her with Bruce really made it all a reality,” Digg stood and leaning against the desk, crossing his arms over his chest.

“It’s funny,” Oliver smiled wryly. “I was so jealous of him. Any time he’d call--day or night--she’d answer immediately. They’d spend anywhere from a few minutes to a few hours on the phone. Just talking. I never could do that with her, both of us were holding back too much to be that open with each other. Any time she’d have a problem, the first person she’d tell would be Bruce fucking Wayne. I saw him at the hospital when she got shot.

“He pushed me into a wall and grabbed the front of my shirt. He told me everything that I had been telling myself to beat myself up about it. He told me that if was my fault, that I ran my mission like I was alone. He told me that my lack of forethought was going to kill her. That my secrets were more poisonous to her than anyone else. He was furious.” Oliver shook his head and threaded his fingers together in front of him. “That was when I figured out that he was in love with her.”

Digg’s eyes widened in surprise. “Oliver--”

“No, Digg. I saw it. I saw how scared and desperate he was. Lashing out because there was nothing he could do. He loves her. With every part of himself. Because even when he was terrified of losing her, he stayed by her. I ran away. I couldn’t deal with it. As much as I love her...I knew that I wasn’t the best person for her.”

“That may be, Oliver, but she didn’t love him.” Digg spoke uncertainly.

“I told myself that, too.” Oliver scraped his hand over his face and gave Digg a wry smile. “But I was wrong. Look at her in that picture. That face is the same face that she’d have every time she’d finish talking to him. She was never as...carefree. She never let herself be that happy unless she was talking to him. One fifteen minute conversation with Wayne and she’d be smiling for hours. Hell, I think I knew before we were even together. When she was my EA, I could always tell when she’d talked to her best friend because she’d spend the rest of the day listening to music and dancing in her chair.”

Digg frowned at Oliver, but didn’t argue. He looked at the pictures and couldn’t help a smile at seeing the carefree Felicity that Oliver had spoken of. He couldn’t say that he hadn’t noticed it, either. When he’d been angry at Oliver, he almost considered telling Felicity to tell Bruce how she felt because he hadn’t trusted Oliver with her. But he wasn’t mad at Oliver anymore, and now he just needed to be supportive. “If they’re both so in love with each other, why aren’t they together?”

“Because he’s worth too much to her for her to risk it.” Oliver whispered, voice hoarse with hurt.

Digg huffed out an annoyed breath. “That woman somehow has the worst taste in men. She and Sara should just run away and adopt a bunch of animals like they always joked about doing.”

Oliver’s eyebrows furrowed in surprised confusion. “What?”

“Oliver, don’t tell me that you realized Felicity and Bruce were in love based on one conversation but you were never aware of Sara being half in love with her, living with her, and constantly asking her to run away together.”

Oliver opened his mouth to defend himself before snapping it closed and chuckling wryly. “I knew they were flirty, but I figured it was just friendship. I was just happy that Sara made Felicity laugh the way she did.”

“Well, then maybe you should adopt the same attitude towards Bruce.” Digg pointed at a photo of Felicity bent at the waist laughing, her arm hooked through Bruce’s for support as he looked down at her with a slight smirk. Digg looked back over at Oliver before leaving to train with the girls.

Oliver stepped forward and pressed his fingers to her smiling face on the screen. He smiled sadly back down at her before closing his eyes as emotions bubbled up in the back of his mind.

“I love you,” Oliver whispered. He understood that he’d lost her, but that didn’t stop the affection he felt towards her. “Please be happy.”

He pulled his hand away from the screen and exited out of the window before moving to help his team train.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> once again, sorry that this took so long and that it's shorter than the other chapters
> 
> s/o to season 4 Oliver who is p gentle and loving towards Felicity. I didn't wanna go against his character development, so I'm having him gradually learning to let go of her. 
> 
> thank you for reading! let me know what you think! :)
> 
> Fun Fact: this is the first chapter where Digg is a frequently used word.


	6. Possible Side Effects

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Day one of Bruce Wayne's butt buster work out

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey guys, sorry for the long wait, I kinda ended up getting surgery *finger guns*
> 
> so yeah, sorry that this one is shorter than the others

Day one of Felicity’s recovery vacation started out with the soothing tones of Alfred Pennyworth.

“Miss Felicity,” The butler’s sharp voice broke through her sleep like a hot knife through butter. She rolled over onto her stomach and groaned in protest. She opened one eye and looked over at the alarm clock next to her bed.

“It is seven in the morning, Alfred.” She grumbled, a slight whine in her voice.

“Master Bruce requested that you get up early for a morning run.”

“Tell Master Bruce that he can go fu--”

“You can tell him yourself in the kitchen in ten minutes,” Alfred interrupted her primly, but she could see the amusement crinkling the skin around his eyes. He left the room when Felicity forced herself to sit up. She let out an annoyed breath and glared at the clock as if it had personally offended her. She stood and carefully popped her back, feeling the tell tale ache from the stimulant in the base of her spine.

She brushed her teeth and pulled her hair into a ponytail, holding off on taking any painkillers until she’d eaten and reported the ache to Bruce, who’d decided to put his degree in biology to good use and play doctor with her.

 _Even in my own mind,_ she thought tiredly, _everything is dirty._

After pulling on some comfortable workout clothes and grabbing her phone, Felicity made her way into the kitchen where Bruce was looking too damn awake.

“I hate you.” She grumbled and sat down at the breakfast nook. There was a dull thunk as she dropped her head onto the table and groaned. “Do you ever sleep? Because I know for a fact that you were still out Batmanning even after I went to bed at four.”

Bruce smirked at her in amusement, but turned to address Alfred instead of justifying her complaining. “Lovely morning, isn’t it?”

“Indeed, Master Bruce,” Alfred answered with a smile of his own in place. He handed Bruce two smoothies. Bruce sipped at one and placed the other by Felicity’s head, laughing when she glared up at him.

“You drag me out of bed after only three hours of sleep and you don’t even give me real food?”

“We’ll eat ‘real food’ after the workout, but you need to get something for your body to run on, so drink up.” Bruce explained. “After you finish, we’ll wait half an hour and go on run, then you’re going to do some yoga to start building up muscles.”

Felicity huffed in annoyance but complied with his order and drank some of the smoothie. She looked over at Alfred and gave him a small smile. “Thank you for making this for me.”

“It was my pleasure, Miss.” Alfred answered serenely.

“He gets sweet gratitude, I get whining.” Bruce pointed out with a raised eyebrow, but was ignored aside from a dismissive hand wave from Felicity.

“How have you been, Alfred? I feel like I haven’t gotten the opportunity to talk with you, yet.”

“I’ve been well. Busy making sure Master Bruce doesn’t get himself killed.” Alfred gave her an a thankful smile. “I should be giving you my thanks, as well. I’m much too old to be staying up all hours of the night in some dark cave. In your time here, you’ve done much for him.”

“Aw, Alfred, you ol’ softie.” Felicity grinned at Bruce’s slightly put out expression. “I’m happy to help out in any way I can.”

“I must ask, Miss Felicity: how long are you planning to stay in Gotham?” Alfred asked curiously.

Felicity let out a sigh and leaned back in her chair. “I don’t know,” She answered honestly. “Part of me is yelling that I shouldn’t start a new life on the foundation of running away from hurt. And another part is reminding me that I’ve only just started getting on good terms with my mother and she lives across the country.”

Alfred hummed as he finished wiping down the counter. He turned to her with a questioning look. “That’s all well and good, but what do you _want_ to do?”

Felicity glanced over at Bruce, only to find him staring at her with the same question on his face. She looked at him for a beat before turning back to Alfred. “I want to stay here for as long as I can.”

Alfred gave her a gentle smile, “If that’s the case, you might want to invest in a moving company to retrieve the rest of your things from Star City. Also, it would be beneficial if you would provide a list of things you may need from the shopping.”

Felicity laughed lightly. “Don’t get your hopes up too soon. Bruce has already threatened to kick me out.”

“Yeah, like Bruce is the one that runs this house,” Tim snorted as he walked into the room and sat down on Felicity’s other side, across from Bruce. He gave Bruce a challenging look. “Alfred makes the final decisions.”

“She already knows that,” Bruce pointed out. “She has, on multiple occasions, gone to Alfred to get information on me or an upper hand in an argument. They team up on me.”

“Yeah, because you’re hopeless at taking care of yourself.” Felicity level a pointed finger at him. “I only team up with Alfred when I need to bring in the big guns.”

“And I with you, Miss Felicity.” Alfred remarked. “Master Tim, would you like some breakfast before you head off to school?”

“Nah, I’m meeting a friend before class and she’s bringing donuts.” Tim grinned. Felicity perked up at the mention of donuts. She looked over at Bruce with an excited expression.

“No.” Bruce spoke, looking at her sternly as her happiness melted into a pout.

Tim laughed at the both of them before standing. “As great as this is, I need to leave now or I’m going to be late. Alfred, can you drive me?”

“Of course, Master Tim. I’ll get the car.” Alfred left the kitchen as Tim leaned over Felicity to hug her with one arm.

“Good luck with him today.” Tim ruffled her ponytail. He and Bruce nodded at each other in some manly Bat code. Felicity said goodbye like a normal person and watched him follow Alfred out before pouting at Bruce again.

“No,” He repeated in exasperation. “Donuts are the definition of unhealthy.”

“So is three hours of sleep!” Felicity shot back. “I thought the point of you hypocritically forcing me to take a vacation was so that I could be well rested!”

“Yes and no,” Bruce crossed his arms over his chest. “I want you to figure out how to balance your night work and work out schedule before you add on the pressure of opening a new branch of your company. Also, I’m hoping that with you clearing your mind and doing tasks that you don’t have to think too hard about--”

“My subconscious will start to come up with some solutions to my problems,” Felicity interrupted him, nodding along. 

Bruce sat down next to her and leveled a serious look at her. “Tell me what’s going on with you. I know that you’ve had a full plate, but I can help you out if you’ll give me the chance.”

Felicity gave him a wan smile before leaning back in her chair and gnawing at her bottom lip. “Well, the most obvious one is HIVE. I know I’m not in Star City anymore, but I can’t just forget about everything that’s happening. Laurel managed to make sure Darhk’s case will go to trial by basically trading in her father’s career and reputation--which is another worry of mine because Captain Lance has been like a father to me these past couple of years. But Damien Darhk is still in jail and HIVE hasn’t made any moves to break him out after Merlyn and Andy tried.”

“Good thing you never told anyone about taking a piece of the idol,” Bruce pointed out. “You saved the lives of your team even without having to be there.”

Felicity looked away at the praise, still slightly guilty over not being there for her old team, “Then there’s the ramifications of the attempted prison break. I mean, Team Arrow managed to secure Darhk, his lackeys, and most of the inmates, but there are still a good number of escaped prisoners--as well as Malcolm Merlyn who may or may not have figured out that I took a piece of the idol because of Oliver’s big damn mouth.”

“Queen told Merlyn that you had the piece?” The man growled as he sat up straight, looking ready to fly over to Star right that second to lecture Oliver on how to treat a team.

“Thea said that he sorta whispered my name when they realized that multiple pieces were missing. Of course, that wouldn’t let Merlyn realize that where I hid the piece, so he’s low on my list of things to worry about.” Felicity made a dismissive gesture. “What worries me about HIVE is that they obviously don’t need Darhk to reach their endgame.”

“Maybe you should let your team handle it.”

Felicity smiled sadly. “They’re not my team anymore, but I can see what you mean. I’ve set up some searches on Watchtower to monitor suspicious activity. If it looks like they’re wrapping up loose ends or anything like that, I’ll contact the team and see if they know what’s going on. If they don’t, I’m sorry, Bruce, but I’ll have to go--”

“You don’t need to apologize,” Bruce held up a hand and gave her a comforting smile. “I knew you were a hero from the moment I met you, Smoak. I know that you’ll do whatever you need to. I just ask that you’ll bring me with you.”

“What?” Felicity cocked her head slightly and looked at her friend in confusion.

“If there is a threat that is so large and unknown that you need to go back to Star, I want to be right there with you so that I can make sure you can make it back to Gotham safe and sound.” His voice was soft and gentle--the tone that he only ever used with her--as he looked her in the eyes unflinchingly. “You’ve had my back since the moment we met. I want to have yours.”

Felicity leaned forward and pressed her forehead against Bruce’s shoulder. “It is too damn early to be dealing with feelings. You can’t go saying things like that when I’ve only had three hours of sleep. You’ll make me cry.”

“At least now I can actually be here to wipe away your tears.” Bruce pressed his lips against the crown of her head in a purely platonic gesture of affection. 

“Remember that when the tears switch from touched to anguish as you force me to run.”

Bruce chuckled and allowed Felicity to pull away and settle back in her chair. “You need to let the smoothie digest before we run, so tell me what else is bothering you.”

“My board,” Felicity pursed her lips. “I need to find a way to convince them to sell the chip for cheap, but I’m at a loss. I’ve already proven to them that the chips are cost effective at reasonable prices, but at this point they’re more focused on how much of a profit we can make. Right now, I’m having Curtis stalling the FDA to buy some time before the approval to start running tests. I hate that I have to hesitate to put out this kind of tech that can help people, but my board is leaving me no choice. I’m pretty sure they’re beginning to realize that I will fight them tooth and nail to get this thing out for a low price, too. The hushed conversations they think won’t circle around back to be are starting to focus on how to terminate my employment.”

Bruce nodded in understandment, leaning back in his chair as he began to think. “Anything else?”

“Eh, Curtis and Thea have been bugging me about dating another billionaire because the paps saw us together yesterday and assumptions were made.” Felicity shrugged. “I don’t really care what gossip rags say. Though, Vicki Vale did say you ‘make heart eyes’ at me while I’m probably set to swindle you out of your company as well. I believe the closing sentence was something along the lines of good luck and advice on a prenup for our inevitable marriage.”

Bruce laughed and shook his head. “Well, a man and woman can never be friends in the eyes of Vicki Vale.”

Felicity rolled her eyes and looked down at her empty glass. “I guess I should also let you know that my back’s sore where the implant is. It’s not the throbbing pain that I had when I first started walking again, but it’s not comfortable. I’m gonna take some ibuprofen for it, but seeing as how you’ve decided that you want to play doctor--” Felicity cut herself off as she realized the implications of her words, making Bruce’s expression turn smug. “Not one word or I’ll go to Vicki Vale with all of Bruce Wayne’s dirty secrets.”

“Oh? And what secrets are those?” Bruce raised his eyebrows at her.

“That you can’t get it up.” Felicity narrowed her eyes at him challengingly. “It doesn’t have to be true. It just has to be interesting.” 

Her satisfied look however, quickly turned nervous when Bruce’s grin grew wider as he looked her up and down in an exaggerated manner. Bruce leaned in close to Felicity until their noses brushed together. He looked her in the eyes and spoke in a low voice. “With you I’d doubt that I’d have any trouble with that.” He leaned back in his chair and watched the blonde bite her lip as she attempted to pull herself together. “Besides, Vicki Vale already knows that I don't have any trouble there.”

“Are you saying--?” Felicity started, her eyebrows furrowing as her scrunched up. “I mean, not to slut-shame--you do you--but _Vicki Vale_ , Bruce? God, do all of you self important billionaire playboys think the only way to distance yourself from your night time facade is to sleep around?”

Bruce scoffed and shook his head. “I can’t believe you’re slut-shaming me. What would our fellow feminists say?”

“I can’t believe you’re such a man whore!” She shot back. “Don’t call me a bad feminist for being amazed at your lack of standards!”

“Says the woman who was engaged to Oliver Queen!” Bruce leveled a finger at her. “Didn’t he sleep with Isabel Rochev?”

“I would rather not think about my vast array of eskimo sisters!” Felicity groaned putting her face in her hands. “They’re all either dead, vigilantes, evil, or a combination of the three.”

Bruce huffed out a laugh before shaking his head again. “How do I end up in these kinds of conversations with you?”

“It’s a best friend thing.” Felicity informed him, peeking out from her fingers to give him a slight smile. “We’re supposed to bond over bashing our exes and slut-shaming each other. It’s in the girl code.”

“You know I’m a man, right?” Bruce asked, his face unreadable.

“So?” She raised a single eyebrow. “You think that girl code can only be applicable to all female relationships? What would our fellow feminists say?”

“I’m just making sure,” He assured her gently. 

“Well, I am shocked and appalled, Brucie. Shocked and appalled. So shocked and appalled that I think I need to go lay down to process this slight against me--nay, this slight against all of femininity!” Felicity declared as she stood from her chair. She started towards the stairs, but was stopped by strong fingers wrapping around her wrist.

“Nice try, Angelica.” Bruce smirked at her. “Alert the feminist presses later. Exercise now.”

“Wait, did you listen to the Hamilton soundtrack?” Felicity asked as Bruce stood.

“Well, you got me curious.” Bruce shrugged defensively. “I liked it. Show tunes aren’t usually my thing, but it has a good story.”

“Bruce Wayne: ultimate nerd.” Felicity smiled up at him, drawing a small grin from him. “I’m converting you over to the show tunes part of nerdom. One of these days, I might even convince you to sing a duet with me.”

Bruce reached behind her to tug on the end of her ponytail. “I’ve heard you sing, Felicity. I have a feeling I’ll stick with a resounding ‘no’.” He threw her a smirk over his shoulder as he brushed past her to leave the kitchen. “Now, I believe you mentioned something about running.”

*

“I hate you,” Felicity wheezed as dropped her hands onto her knees and crouched down a little to support herself. Between the friction from running and the sweat combined with the breeze, she was both overheated and freezing. Her ribcage felt like her lungs were too big while her throat burned and demanded that they become even larger for her. She could actually _hear_ her pulse, beating out an unsteady tattoo that matched the tempo of the throbbing of her calves.

Bruce Wayne, as Felicity had learned over the past 15 minutes, was a pain in her ass.

He was the type of person that lived by the code of ‘go big or go home’. This might seem like an obvious conclusion to anyone who had ever met him or seen the Batcave or the Batmobile (or anything else that he named ‘bat’ like he was some out of control label maker) and hadn’t immediately thought that they were the result of compensation issues. Felicity, however, hadn’t realized just how far that motto might take them.

Apparently, he’d planned on a four mile run as a warm up.

“Is this punishment for not calling you for months?” Felicity asked as she flopped down onto the sidewalk, allowing the sun-warmed concrete to heat her back. “Because I thought you had forgiven me for that.”

She could hear Bruce’s exasperated sigh as he jogged back over to her. He stopped--barely out of breath, the asshole--and hovered over her with his stupid, judgemental face.

“Or is this because it took me so long to move to Gotham?” Felicity glared up at him. “Is it something I did in a past life? Did I piss you off in a past life, Bruce? Is that why you trusted me from the very beginning? Are we reincarnated best friends who are destined to chill together? Did I like, fuck your girlfriend or betray you in some way or are you just pissed that I don’t remember all of our lives?”

“Right now the only thing you’re doing that’s pissing me off is giving up.” Bruce raised one eyebrow at her. “We’re still a mile out from the mansion, Felicity. How do you plan on getting home?”

“Home? Well, it’s simple. I’m going to pray to the goddess Athena to lend me strength so that I may kick your smug fucking face and go back home and lock you out of your stupid overcompensating man cave.” Felicity closed her eyes and tried to get her breathing back to normal, ignoring the throbbing coming from the base of her spine.

Bruce took another deep breath before Felicity heard the sound of shuffling--presumably as he sat down beside her spread eagle form.

“Is it your back?” He asked in a quiet voice, almost too quiet for her to even hear of the sound of early morning Gotham traffic. Felicity felt a single tear escape from the corner of her eye down her temple and settling into her ear uncomfortably. Throat burning from effort, she decided against forming words and simply nodded once. “Well, I need to finish my run. And, you’re not wearing a skirt today, so I could give you that piggy back ride, now.”

Felicity opened her eyes and smiled emotionally up at her best friend. “What did I ever do to deserve you?”

“You hacked me. Twice. Can you stand?” At her nod, Bruce grabbed Felicity’s hands and helped her to her feet. “How do you wanna do this?”

“You need to stand in front of me,” She positioned him and pushed down on his shoulders. “Crouch down. No, further down, I am very short. Okay, now I’m going to wrap my arms around your neck--let me know if it’s too tight--and then when you stand, you can grab my legs and pull them around your waist/hip area.”

Following her instructions, the two were off in no time.

Bruce even pretended to be annoyed when she had managed to drift off to sleep by the time they made it back to the manor. He ignored Alfred’s questioning look--something he realized he’d have to get used to now that she was with them--and gently maneuvered her down to sleep in her room.

And if he kissed her forehead and lingered a little too long in her doorway watching her sleep, well...who could blame him?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> also: would you people be interested if I posted some 1) plot bunnies that are related to this story but are things I couldn't work in or decided against? and/or 2) other fanfictions of Felicity with other superheroes like Superman or Captain America?
> 
> Fun Fact: the word Alfred was the third most frequently used word in this chapter--losing only to our leads.


	7. ¿Porque no podemos ser amigos?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Clark flies in to shake things up and get the low down on the Bats

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys! Sorry for taking so long to update, and that this chapter is so short, but I've been fairly busy with isolating depression and summer school *finger guns*
> 
> Anyway, some of the more astute of you may have realized that this story is now a part of a series. I've decided to start posting side bits and alternate storylines up here because sometimes I write those before I finish typing up a new chapter, so I want to give you guys some kind of content while I'm doing fuck knows what. The only other work I've posted so far, though, is a oneshot that basically explains the history that Clark and Felicity share. You can read it before or after this chapter--or not at all--because I was definitely careful enough not to make it to where you had to read one before the other.

_”I need your help.”_

“I was napping,” Felicity whined into the phone as she rolled over onto her back, the pain having gone down since the run to the point where she’d even fallen asleep on Bruce’s back. She assumed that he’d been the one to put her in her room and that he’d decided to give her the day to rest, because she could see through her windows that it was well past noon. The only reason she hadn’t stayed asleep was the dulcet tones of “I Need A Hero” by the Fairy Godmother from Shrek 2.

Which was concerning, a part of her comprehended through the fog of exhaustion, seeing as Clark went out of his way to _not_ call Felicity.

 _”Really? Because I’m in your apartment and you aren’t here.”_ Clark sounded tired, which managed to pull Felicity out of her nap fully.

“I’m not in Star City. Clark, what’s going on?” Felicity asked as she sat up and retrieved her tablet to look up the news in Metropolis.

_“Me ‘what’s going on’? _You_ ‘what’s going on’! First you’re paralyzed and refusing to answer mine or Lois’ texts, now I hear you’re not even in Starling?”_

Felicity rolled her eyes and checked the time. Half past noon. The last time she’d slept that late, she’d been in Monaco. She’d kill for Monaco right now. “Tell me why you sound like you just found out that the puppy you adopted from the pound was actually a lost pet and I’ll tell you all about my past couple of weeks.”

Clark left out an unhappy huff. _”I need to talk to you in person. Where are you?”_

“Um...Wayne Manor?” Felicity tried to keep her voice casual, but Clark knew her worryingly well and could see--hear?--right through it.

_” _Bruce_ Wayne? Bruce ‘Batman’ Wayne? Bruce ‘your best friend who you’ve been in love with for years’ Wayne? Bruce ‘the main reason you were happy at first that Oliver didn’t propose to you’ Wayne?”_

“God, Lois and I include you in way too much girl talk,” Felicity laid back down on her bed and threw her arm over her eyes in shame. “I know, I know. I’m a glutton for punishment. You can tell me all about it when you get here...after I shower. You and Bruce know each other, right?”

Now, apparently, it was Clark’s turn to try to hide his embarrassment from her via a forced cheerful tone. _”We’ve um...met.”_

“I don’t wanna know. I’ll text you when I’m out of the shower.” Felicity hung up and ignored her phone when the voice of Jennifer Saunders started up again.

-

Bruce knocked lightly on Felicity’s open door, intent on waking her up for some yoga to, hopefully, help her alleviate her back pain. He leaned against the doorframe as she looked up from pulling on a cardigan. Her lips quirked up into an instinctual smile at the sight of him that warmed his heart. Fuck. Every time he was around this girl, he felt like the Grinch standing next to fucking Cindy Lou Who.

“Well if it isn’t my favorite crime fighter,” Felicity’s grin turned wider as she started brushing out her still damp hair.

“I didn’t expect you to be up yet,” Bruce commented as he looked over her for signs of distress. “How are you feeling?”

Felicity leaned forward to flip her hair over her head before gathering it all together and pulling it into a ponytail. She gestured to the bottle of painkillers on her nightstand and threw Bruce a wry look as she sat on her bed to pull on a pair of socks and some ankle boots. “I took a vicodin so I’m actually on my way to feeling pretty great right now. And as for the being awake part, a friend called.”

“Is that why you’re getting ready to leave?” He asked curiously, watching as she picked up her phone and shot off a quick text.

“Well, he’s coming by here--which I hope is okay, but I couldn’t exactly ask for a ride to meet him somewhere because I’m not going to take up your time. I mean, he might not really be comfortable talking about whatever it is he needs to talk to me about, but he sounded pretty tired over the phone, which is kinda throwing me for a loop--”

“Felicity,” Bruce stepped forward and placed a hand on her shoulder to pull her out of the ramble. “First of all, while you’re here, I want you to feel at home. I want this to be your home. That means that as long as you’re discreet, I don’t mind if you see your friends over here. In fact, I’d prefer it. Here, I can keep you safe. Second of all, whatever is going on, don’t make yourself worry about it before you need to. It will just lead to you stressing yourself out during the one vacation I had to force you to take. Thirdly, who is this friend? Diggle?”

“Um, no.” Felicity’s expression, which had become more relaxed with his reassurances, tensed once more. “It’s actually Clark.”

“Clark Kent?” Bruce raised his eyebrows slightly as his lips pursed together.

“Yeah,” Felicity nodded. “He mentioned that you two have met.”

“You could say that.”

Felicity rolled her eyes and stood, ignoring the forced quality to Bruce’s tone. “I’ll tell you what I told him: I don’t wanna know. I just want to make sure he’s alright.”

“I’m fine,” A new voice spoke from in the hall. Bruce and Felicity both turned to look at Clark with identical looks of alarm before Felicity’s melted into a long suffering expression. “You worry too much.”

“This from the man who decided to go to my apartment in Star just because I wasn’t answering my texts.” Felicity shot back. “And I told you, stop sneaking up on me and learn how to knock on a fucking door. How did you get in, anyway? Did you break something?”

“If you must know, mother, Alfred let me in.” Clark raised an unamused eyebrow at her before giving her a cursory glance. “So, I believe you owe me about thirty explanations, starting with you getting engaged and ending with why you’re in Gotham.”

“I don’t owe you shit,” Felicity rolled her eyes once more. “You, however, never get worried enough to visit unless you or Lois need something long enough for you to notice something is up. I’m guessing this has something to do with the mission I gave you?”

“You give him missions?” Bruce asked, watching the back and forth between the two while clamping down on his amusement at the friendly annoyance. 

“I’ll drop him a dime the same way I’ll give you or Barry tips.” She shrugged.

“She secretly controls all of us,” Clark teased. “I’m telling you, she knows everything about every active hero.”

“Eh, not _all_ of you. Nightwing is mostly on his own because he’s still sore about me ditching him in Star City. I need Arsenal out of the public eye, so it’d be too risky to assign him missions that coincide with my investigations, and I almost never give the Legends anything…” Felicity trailed off in thought before pursing her lips and cocking her head to the side. “Well there was that one incident with Sara and…” She cut herself off and blushed brightly. Clearing her throat she got back to the matter at hand. “Anyway, what happened when I sent you in? Did you do what I told you to?”

“I was discreet,” Clark promised, bristling at her lack of faith and causing Bruce to scoff.

“You were discreet?” Bruce raised one eyebrow.

“Okay, maybe I wasn’t perfectly discreet,” Clark rolled his eyes. “But, I got to the projects lab before anyone sounded any alarms. What happened when I got there, though…” Clark flicked his eyes over to Bruce before looking back at the blonde. At her nod, he continued. “I felt...weak. Sick.”

Felicity narrowed her eyes. “What? I thought that that was impossible.”

“I did, too.” Clark sighed heavily. “I thought...the mission was from you and you’re the smartest person I know, so I thought that maybe you’d have a theory.”

“Clark, I wouldn’t send you anywhere if I thought you didn’t have more of a chance of getting out than dying. I wouldn’t blindly send you off to a suspected weakness.” Felicity frowned up at him, somehow sounding all the parts of disappointed mother, hurt friend, and perfectly reasonable handler.

“I know. I know, I promise,” Clark assured her gently. Bruce watched as the two of them stared at each other, a silent conversation--built on a type of friendship that was vastly different from the one he had with the blonde but nearly as close.

“Bruce!” Felicity turned to him with a smile as bright as sunshine. “Do you want to do me--”

“Dirty!” Clark interrupted with a shit eating grin, once again earning twin looks from the two of them--only this time in the flavor of exasperation and annoyance.

“--a favor? Please?” Felicity finished, turning to Bruce to communicate the situation to him. Clark wasn’t comfortable around Bruce. Whatever happened had been bad enough to scare him if he was still shaky because of it. Clark was unused to feeling vulnerable, he didn’t trust Bruce any farther than Felicity could throw him. Clark wouldn’t tell her everything that happened while Bruce was there.

Bruce raised his eyebrows at her. He trusted Clark less than Clark trusted him.

Felicity cocked her head to the side. She wasn’t asking him to trust Clark. She was asking him to trust her.

Bruce glared at Clark for a beat before looking down at Felicity and nodding once before turning on his heels to leave.

“Holy crap, you domesticated the Batman.” Clark gave her an impressed look.

“Shut up.” Felicity leveled a threatening finger at Clark. “Not one word about this until you tell me what happened at Lexcorp.”

“I thought that I was shutting up.” Clark raised a single eyebrow as he closed Felicity’s bedroom door and plopped down in a chair next to her makeup table. Felicity gave him a serious look.

“Do I have to order you to give me a mission report in my loud voice? Because that always made Diggle stop sassing and start explaining.” Felicity crossed her arms over her chest before softening. “I’ll explain everything myself once we’re done with this, but your safety is more important than my bad couple of weeks.”

“That’s crap and you know it,” Clark huffed before looking towards her window. “Okay, so it happened like this…”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh no a cliff hanger! What a shocking surprise!
> 
> Okay so, for the extensive universe, please let me know if there's anything specific you'd like to see and I'll try to work it in! The extensive universe, of course, takes place in the universe of this story--maybe a few alternate storylines or decisions for little plot bunnies, but ultimately checking into this as a sorta "canon". Because why not write fanfiction or your fanfiction? That seems like the next logical step!
> 
> Also: chapter updates are going to be shorter and more erratic because I am planning a few stories at the 'mo and going to summer school. I'm going to be writing a few Felicity/[random superhero] oneshots and stories for the people that requested them so please continuing telling me who you would like to see her with. :)
> 
> Fun Fact: the words Clark and Felicity are used the same amount of times in this chapter, 4 more times than even Bruce.


	8. Miss Terry

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Clark explains shit, Bruce feels shit.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> as per usual, sorry for the wait and how short it is. this chapter is bruce-centric and finally starts delving into ~feelings~ territory. the flashback and before it refer to a scene that is a part of the expanded universe in the felicity and clark fic. you can read that scene from her point of view there, but because I repeat it in a flashback, you can just read this and you should be fine.

“Okay, so you somehow managed not to set off any alarms before you got into the lab, right?” Felicity paced back and forth as she mentally reviewed what the man sitting on her bed had told her in the last hour.

Clark rolled his eyes and gave her an unimpressed look. “I can be subtle.”

Felicity raised a single eyebrow and returned his expression.

“You need to stop living with Bruce. You’re already starting to act more like him.” Clark grumbled.

“How do you know Bruce doesn’t act like me?” The blonde asked. Clark shrugged before his lips grew into a shiteating grin. “Whatever you just thought, you keep that shit to yourself.” Felicity pointed at Clark firmly. “Anyway, you make it to the lab and find a glowing green rock?”

“Yes.”

“And when you got closer to the rock, you felt weaker?” Clark nodded at her words, even though they both knew, she wasn’t really asking, just getting it straight in her mind. “And you know that it was the rock because when Lex fucking Luthor showed up, he used it against you.”

Again, Clark nodded.

“What do you mean by feeling ‘weak’?” She asked, brows furrowed.

“Drained, I guess.” Clark sighed heavily as he recalled the feeling--he doubted that he would forget it anytime soon. “It felt like all of my energy was being pulled out of my body and replaced by...I don’t know...a heavy metal, or something. My arms and head felt three times heavier almost immediately. When Luthor showed up and he used the stone against me, the closer it got, the faster it messed with me.”

Felicity nodded absentmindedly before stopping in front of Clark and turning a sharp look his way. “How did you escape?”

“Oh, uh...I was saved.” Clark ducked his head.

“By who?”

“...I don’t know. I didn’t get a good look at her, but she found me when I tried to fly away and started falling.” He admitted.

Felicity bit her bottom lip as she thought to herself. “This woman, she caught you? Was she flying, too?” Clark nodded. “Did you say anything to her?”

Clark furrowed his eyebrows as he thought back, “I...uh...may have asked her if you sent her.”

“What did you say, exactly?”

“‘Did Felicity send you?’”

Felicity huffed in annoyance. “Great, so now that Superman has probably been spotted flying over Star and Gotham, she’ll probably be able to connect the dots and figure me out.” She shook her head to herself. “Actually, let’s not think about that part right now. That stone is the main priority. Did Luthor say anything about it?”

“He called it...Kryptonite. He said that it was from a meteor that has fallen from Krypton when I got here.” Clark recalled.

“Okay, Kryptonite and mystery women. Let’s get you down to the cave, I need to take some blood.” Felicity started out of her room, muttering to herself.

*

“Is she...always like this?” Clark asked from where he was stood next to Bruce, the two of them watching Felicity flit around the cave. She was mumbling and switching between screens in the console of Bruce’s batcomputer. 

“Which part specifically?” Bruce spoke without looking over at the other hero,

“In her own world, I guess.” Clark clarified. “I’ve never seen her working, I only get sent texts every now and then about things I need to check out in Metropolis.”

Bruce’s gaze flicked over to Clark briefly before pinning themselves back on the blonde. “Yes, she’s always like this. It’s interesting to watch someone so focused yet so scatterbrained at the same time.”

“Sounds like a recipe for disaster, but she handles it well.”

“You just summed up Felicity better than you realize.” Bruce smirked. Clark narrowed his eyes and looked between the two of them.

“So, you two are dating, right? That’s why she’s here?” Clark asked. “Because even though she promised me answers, she got distracted by the Kryptonite and Miss Terry.”

“Miss Terry?”

“Mystery. She started calling the woman who saved my Miss Terry in honor of Mystery Woman being quote ‘too damn long’.” Clark explained.

Bruce hummed in amusement. “To answer your question, we’re not together. Her and Queen ended pretty...abruptly. She needed some time and space away from Star, and I’ve been wanting her to come out here for a while, so she thought of me first.”

“You two are really close.” Clark observed, his tone investigative.

“We’ve known each other for years.” Bruce side-eyed Clark critically. “What, exactly, are you fishing for?”

“I’m just curious why two people who are obviously head over heels for each other are dancing around being together like it’s a sidewalk salsa.” Clark stated bluntly. Bruce’s eyes narrowed at Clark, but the other wasn’t finished. “I mean, I’ve known that Felicity was in love with you since our ‘date’ and I’ve known you reciprocated since she made me distract you while she was dealing with he League of Assassins--”

“What?” Bruce growled irritably, shooting a glare at Felicity’s back.

“--but I cannot wrap my head around why the two of you are so scared to take that step.” Clark ignored Bruce’s _very rude_ interruption and continued. “What makes two of the smartest and bravest people that I know so damn stupid and cowardly?”

Bruce pursed his lips and turned to face Clark head on. “Even if I did have feelings for Felicity like you think I do--which I do not--and she had the same kind of feelings for me--which she does not--and our relationship was your business--which it isn’t--she just got out of an engagement, Clark. With a man that she loved.”

“Yeah, a billionaire vigilante who poses as a playboy for the public and chose to date every woman around him except for her.” Clark frown and looked at Felicity’s back. “The girl has worrying taste in men, I’ll give her that.”

Bruce ignored the parallel and studied Clark’s expression. “What are you getting at, Kent?”

“Well, _Wayne_ ,” Clark snorted softly before turning towards Bruce with a curious expression. “Why did you reject her when she asked you three years?”

There was a pause where he only sound that could be heard in the cave was the soft mumbling and tapping of fingernails on keys as Felicity worked and Bruce processed.

“What are you talking about?” Bruce spoke in a low voice, cautious with the echo in the cave--he knew how the sound could carry over to where Felicity was situated.

“After the Undertaking.” Clark furrowed his eyebrows together in confusion. “I met her volunteering--her and a kid named Jason, who I’m assuming was yours--and we went on a date, but she was mugged and we accidentally revealed our secret identities to each other. We spent...a good deal of time talking afterward and we made a pact.”

Bruce clenched his jaw, remembering the week he’d stayed at Felicity’s apartment with Jason. He could recalled the night she’d went out on a date easily--everything from Jason’s incessant prattling about how Bruce had ‘missed his chance’ to pacing for three hours after eight because she had _said that she’d be home be eight_ and she had texted, sure, but the words were off; everything that night had made him overly anxious. When she came home late a mess and offhandedly said that she was mugged, he’d almost lost it.

*

_He was frozen to her floor for seconds after she’d said it. What he’d thought would be a simple exchange had been crushed by her flippant answer._

_“How was your date?” Bruce asked, standing by the couch as he turned off the TV that Jason had fallen asleep to._

_“Great, I was almost mugged.” Felicity grumbled and moved to the kitchen to grab her ice cream as Bruce felt his stomach tie itself into knots. A slight wave of her hand as she walked to her room snapped him out of his own mind--imagining 1,001 ways he could’ve lost her in the past couple of hours without even knowing it. He trailed behind her, mind working overtime to try and keep up with the blonde._

_“What do you mean you were almost mugged?” He hissed, grabbing her elbow to stop her from walking on before he’d looked her over. “Are you okay?”_

_Now that he was closer, he could see the slight evidence of her night--the small scratch from a knife on her neck not even malicious enough to be labeled a cut and residual shakiness from the adrenaline crash. Her eyes were clear, though, not clouded over in pain, and her mascara was still intact which meant that she hadn’t even cried during the interaction._

_Fuck, what was that vigilante doing to her? Changing her normal to _this_?_

_“I’m fine, Bruce. I’m made of tough stuff. I owe my boss’ bodyguard a basket of kittens, though, because without him insisting I learn Krav Maga, I’d be dead.” Felicity tried to reassure him, but whatever comfort he could’ve gotten from the words was cancelled out by the cavalier way she’ spoken them and the last part of what she’d said._

__I’d be dead._ _

_Bruce could feel the desperation and fear clawing at his chest, but he couldn’t keep the emotions own as well as usual. Not when it came to her. He clenched and unclenched his hands, holding himself back from using them to check over every part of her body until he was sure that she was safe and sound._

__I’d be dead._ _

_“Is that supposed to make me feel better?” He snapped. Her eyes widened as the realization dawned upon her._

_“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to--” Felicity sighed. “Sorry. I’m still a bit scrambled. Clark was understanding, though. We ended up opening up a lot to each other. Just friends, though. Because he’s in love with a coworker, and I’m a mess.”_

_A small part of Bruce--a part that he purposefully didn’t make an effort to understand--revelled in the fact that Felicity was no longer interested in Kent, but the rest of him was actively searching for a socially acceptable way to _touch_ her and make sure she was really there. He brought one cautious hand up to squeeze her shoulder before giving into the urge and pulling her into a hug._

_“You’re not a mess,” Bruce spoke, his lips against her soft blonde hair._

_“Yes, I am.” Felicity whined. “I just cried to a guy that I’ve spent a total of maybe two hours with about my tragic backstory and fear of being abandoned. Of course, he is just as much of a mess because he told me about his fear of rejection. We bonded a lot tonight. Especially over both of our whole unrequited love shit.”_

_“Unrequited love?” Bruce asked, a bit of amusement creeping in and replacing the anxiety in his chest._

_“I lived a life before you,” Felicity quipped. They both lapsed into a beat of silence as Felicity thought and Bruce held her to assure himself that she was fine. By the time she’d pulled away, he had replaced all of the worry in his chest with the same warm feeling that he always got around her._

_“Hey, Bruce?” Felicity murmured as she opened her ice cream and ate a spoonful._

_“Yes, Felicity?” Bruce mimicked her quiet volume._

_“You wanna go out to dinner tomorrow night?” She asked, voice small._

_Bruce smiled, mentally picturing the three of them together at some restaurant. He didn’t doubt that her and Jason would have a great time going out and as long as those two were smiling and in his general vicinity, Bruce couldn’t help but to be happy. “Yeah, I think Jason would like that.”_

_That was another slight pause before Felicity smiled thinly and yawned. “Well, I’m tired. Could you put this back in the freezer for me?”_

_“You only took one bite,” Bruce’s eyebrows furrowed as he questioned her._

_“Yes, but my adrenaline high is wearing off and now I’m feeling tired and sore.” Felicity told him, the words sounding too easily put together. Bruce gave her a questioning look, but was met with her patented doe eyes. “Please, Bruce? I’ll make it up to you tomorrow.”_

_He chuckled under his breath. Giving into the urge--as it seemed to be working for him so far--he leaned forward to pressed a kiss to her forehead. “All I need from you is for you to stay safe.”_

_“Wow, I must disappoint you a lot, lately, huh?” Felicity drawled, amused. She watched as Bruce shook his head and rolled his eyes before leaving her room. She pursed her lips and watched him go, the ghost of his kiss on her forehead._

_And he left, the ghost of the feeling of her skin on his lips._

*

“What kind of pact did you two make?” Bruce asked, mind running a mile a second as he thought back onto the way she’d spoken that night. _God_ , how could he be so _stupid_? If Clark was to be believed, Felicity had asked him on a date and he never even _noticed_.

“If she asked you out, I asked Lois out.” Clark shrugged, seemingly unaware of the trainwreck that was going on in Bruce’s head--which only served Bruce to be more annoyed with him.

_I lost my chance before I even knew there was one._

Wait, what?

No, he told himself. No, he did not have those kinds of feelings for Felicity. His feelings were purely platonic. Whatever Superman was seeing wasn’t there.

It wasn’t.

Him and Felicity just weren’t like that. Maybe there had been a crush once upon a time, but even if there had been, it was best they hadn’t acted on them. The reason he was so worried that night was _because_ he couldn’t lose Felicity. If he started to have those types of feelings about her now...he’d surely lose her.

Not that she would’ve lost him if she’d confessed and he didn’t have those feelings.

Actually, if she didn’t have those feelings and he did, she would probably annoyingly gentle and gracious about it. She’d probably apologize--like it was somehow her fault. They would both do anything to keep their friendship in tact.

Okay, so maybe it wouldn’t mean losing her, but he wouldn’t take advantage of her. Felicity was in a vulnerable place--both that night and right then. She was raw, emotionally. She was braving a storm and just trying to keep her head above water. She was suffering.

No matter what, Bruce would support her, but he couldn’t let her think he only did that because of romantic feelings. No, even if he did have romantic feelings toward her-- _which he didn’t_ \--he wouldn’t think about them until Felicity was in an okay place.

He closed his eyes and grimaced. His train of thought was becoming more and more like Felicity’s with every damn day he spent with her.

“Clark! Come here and look at these mugshots, I wanna see if you can identify Miss Terry!” Felicity yelled. Clark looked over at Bruce briefly before floating towards his friend. The two of them started chattering away, but Bruce couldn’t take it. He turned on his heel and left the cave.

*

Funnily enough, Felicity didn’t get another one on one with Bruce until late the night--or early the next morning, if you were a lame person who adhered to socially acceptable standards. Even then, she didn’t find him, he found her sitting on the kitchen counter, stuffing her face full of mint chocolate chip ice cream.

When he walked in, they both looked at each other in surprise for a silent second before Bruce wordlessly grabbed a spoon and stood in front of her to start helping her finish off the ice cream.

“So, what were you and Clark talking about that was so horrible you had to avoid him for the rest of the day until I swindled you both into patrolling together to bond and shit?” Felicity asked around a spoonful of the dessert.

“I wasn’t avoiding Clark,” Bruce huffed.

“Then you were avoiding me.” Felicity stated, raising a single eyebrow. “Are you pissed that I let Clark come over here, because the big boy thing to do here is to use your words.”

Bruce gave her a withering look. “You know that I’m not Tim, right? You can’t mother me.”

“I’ll mother whoever the fuck I want to, Wayne.” Felicity pointed her spoon at him menacingly. Bruce chuckled and shook his head.

“Whatever you say, Felicity.” He conceded. “It was just...a little crowded down there today.”

Felicity hummed and gently squeezed Bruce’s shoulder. “I’m sorry about that, but technically, you are a few inches taller than him, so you take up more room.”

Bruce huffed out another laugh and looked up at Felicity, her blue eyes shining in amusement, blonde hair braided into twin French braids (courtesy of Tim) falling over her shoulders, freckles dotting her nose where normally foundation and concealer would cover them up.

_This is the woman I love._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> okay, buckaroos, question time:
> 
> What Superhero Do You Want To See Felicity With First?
> 
> Steve Rogers/Captain America  
> James "Bucky" Barnes/the Winter Soldier  
> Clark Kent/Superman  
> Sara Lance/White Canary


	9. Legends

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Legends need the Batman. I need some coffee.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HA HA HA HA HA REMEMBER HOW I TOLD YOU GUYS I WAS REALLY BUSY WITH SUMMER SCHOOL? WELL IT WAS A LOT HARDER THAN I ACTUALLY THOUGHT SO THIS IS VERY DELAYED AND VERY SHORT AND MAINLY BEING POSTED SO THAT I CAN START UP THE NEW SERIES 'SMOAK'D' WHICH WILL INCLUDE ALL OF MY FELICITY RARE PAIRS (read the end notes for that)
> 
> HAHAHAHA
> 
> I'm sorry. I suck.

The next morning, the sun rose as per usual. Alfred somehow convinced Felicity to get up with it--with far more polite a result than Bruce got the previous morning. Alfred made them smoothies and Bruce and Felicity sat together to drink them while pestering and teasing each other. Tim came down for a minute to wolf down some eggs and complain that they hadn’t let him meet Clark. Alfred took Tim to school, Felicity made puppy dog eyes up at Bruce as she tried to negotiate him down from a mile run to half a mile.

It was business per usual.

The earth was orbiting the sun, spinning at a constant rate that was far too high of a speed for any of them to feel. The moon was orbiting the earth and seeming to follow kids’ cars on road trips. Flowers bloomed and died, dogs barked, cats were assholes.

The world continued on, even if Bruce’s was shaken.

He tried to think back to how he acted around Felicity before he was in love with her, but the more he looked back, the more painstakingly obvious it was how quickly and how hard he fallen for her. It was almost embarrassing. He couldn’t remember a time when he wasn’t either already in love with or in the process of falling in love with her. From the beginning, she was something new for him. 

She was his best friend, had been for longer than Felicity probably realized. Even back when Felicity was still in college, he’d been all too willing to rely on her. Hell, when the batcomputer started acting up, he’d called her in instead of Fox. He’d delivered the location of the Bat Cave to her on a platter while basically saying ‘Pretty please don’t tell the world I’m Batman’.

There weren’t many people in this world with the capability to make Bruce look and feel completely stupid, but there went Felicity Smoak: capable without even really trying.

And oh, how he loved her for it.

He even loved her when she somehow managed to make an entire mile run while constantly complaining about it. Which she was currently doing. Right now. Right behind him.

The sigh of relief that escaped his chest when they once again saw the mansion--the mark that their run would finally be over--was quickly mark as presumptive when Bruce spotted something else on his lawn.

“Felicity?” He interrupted her rant as he stopped suddenly enough to make Felicity bump into his back. She made a curious noise behind him as she rubbed her nose. “Why is there a spaceship in my front yard?”

“‘Why are you blaming me’ is the real question here.” Felicity shot back as she looked over the sleek ship. “I promise, detective, I have an alibi. Just ask Bruce Wayne, I was with him all of this morning.”

“Har har,” Bruce deadpanned as Felicity reach up to run her hand over the ship just before it seemed to shudder and go into a camouflage mode. If Bruce hadn’t seen it before the shudder, he wouldn’t have even looked twice at it. “What’d you do?”

“Okay, seriously?” Felicity turned and raised her eyebrows at Bruce. “What the hell, Bruce? You think I understand this any better than you do right now?”

“Cutie!” A surprised voice came from the ship before a ramp came down to the ground and Felicity was greeted with an armful of assassin.

“Sara!” The hacker cried happily and hugged the other blonde tightly. Jax, Martin, and Rip all came out, trailing after the assassin that was gleefully spinning Felicity around in circles.

“Felicity Smoak?” Jax asked, looking to Rip for the answer. “I thought that Felicity was the Arrow’s IT girl. We’re looking for the Bat. One of them lives in Starling, where you can occasionally see sunshine, and the other lives in Gotham, where most of the citizens think the sun is a myth.”

“Rest assured, Jackson, we are in Gotham.” Rip rolled his eyes slightly. “History never learns the secret identity of the Batman, so I decided to go to a Gotham where we might have a friend who’d be willing to help us with our search.”

“This explains why you distracted Raymond with Mr. Rory.” Dr. Stein realized. “Your form of help is Ms. Smoak.”

“I resent that remark!” Felicity called out while cocooned in Sara’s arms. Still. “Ray and I are professionals and can work together even after breaking up, thank you very much. Who is it, do you think, who saved him when he first went ant-sized?”

“That’s my girl,” Sara practically purred.

“As much as I hate to interrupt this reunion,” Bruce started, directing his voice to Felicity. “What exactly is going on?”

“Oh! You’re here with the Moose! That makes sense!” Sara grinned wildly as she freed Felicity from her arms, playfully nudging her shoulder slightly. “You dirty little--”

“Sara!” Felicity’s face turned a bright red. She turned back to Bruce and smiled a smile that would’ve been innocent if Bruce hadn’t spent more than a minute with her. “Bruce, these are my friends. Or, Sara’s my friends, and these are her friends. Or, her team, rather. I don’t know how friendly they are, because they’re all out of order for me, time travel and all.”

“Ms. Smoak, do you think perhaps we can keep the secrets of the universe out of the hands of the Gotham elite?” Rip chastised her.

“Rip, do you think perhaps you could stop kidnapping the only exes I have that I’m still on good terms with?” Felicity raised an eyebrow at him defiantly.

Bruce furrowed his eyebrows and gave Felicity a confused look. “Ex _es_? As in, more than just Ray?”

“Yeah, Sara and I went on a few dates before she died.” Felicity shrugged.

“We never did get that timing quite right. You’re finally interested in me, I go join the League of Assassins. I figure out a way to work off my debt so that we have a shot at being together, I go and die. I come back to life and _someone_ is dating someone else’s ex-boyfriend and someone has uncontrollable bloodlust.”

“And then that someone goes off time traveling _without telling me_.” Felicity leveled her pointer finger at Sara. “Don’t think you’re not getting the loud voice for that, missy.”

“Note to self: if I ever need to keep Sara in line, I just need to threaten to tell Felicity on her,” Jax chuckled. He stepped forward and held out his hand to Felicity. “Hi, I’m Jax. We haven’t really met. This is Martin Stein and Rip Hunter.”

“Yeah, I know who you guys are.” Felicity shook Jax’s hand and smiled at all of them. “I’m Felicity Smoak, and this is Bruce Wayne. Welcome to Gotham.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sigh, that went by faster than I'd hoped.
> 
> Okay, so the result of the poll was this: AN OVERWHELMING AMOUNT OF YOU WANT FELICITY TO BANG CAPTAIN AMERICA.
> 
> (tbh the results were like, 1. Cap, 2. Fucky, 3. Not Dead, and 7. White Bread, barely anyone wanted Felicity to bang White Bread. sad day for white bread.) ~~good luck figuring those out, my dudes~~
> 
> So, I started on both the Cap and the Fucky universes, have written some stuff down, and have posted chapter 1 of Cap, it's in the Smoak'd series that I put this as a part of. Have fun, my friends.
> 
> ***Smoak'd series is a series of UNRELATED UNIVERSES.***


	10. Connections

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Legends need a favor from Felicity.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> okay, so this one is short, too. sorry. I suck. At least we're starting to get to one of the main plots...

“Alright, Cutie,” Sara wrapped her arm around Felicity’s shoulders and basically dragged her into the mansion. “Let’s get you dressed and then you’re taking me out.”

“Um, Sara?” Jax crossed his arms over his chest and looked at the blondes expectantly. “Come on, we need to make this alliance with the Bat and you said that our best bet for finding him would be Felicity. You can’t just take her away.”

“Do you see what I’ve have to deal with these days? I’m in desperate need of some fun, Smoak.” Sara ignored Jax. “Go out with me. Let’s have some fun.”

“Sara, we did not come here for you to hook up with our informant.” Rip tiredly rubbed his fingers over his temples. Felicity shot Sara and apologetic look before ducking under her arm and looking towards Bruce.

“Do you mind if we borrow your kitchen?” She asked. The two engaged in a silent conversation, one that Felicity seemed to win. “I can get in contact with Batman, but first I need to get changed. Bruce can show you the way.”

“Since when am I your butler?” Bruce asked with one raised eyebrow. Felicity huffed out a laugh.

“Why, that would have been when you decided that we need to run at an ungodly hour in the morning.”

“Oh, how I’ve missed this,” Sara grinned up at Bruce, who gave her an annoyed look. “Billionaire, playboy, wrapped around the little finger of a tiny blonde.”

*

“So, Mr. Wayne,” Rip started as the team gathered around the table with Bruce at the head. “You don’t seem too shocked about all of this.”

“I’ve known Felicity for years. I’ve learned not to expect anything resembling ‘normal’ from her.” Bruce deadpanned.

“Don’t worry, Moose.” Sara gave him a sly smile. “I already told them about how you bankroll the Bat and helped out the Arrow when we needed more moolah.”

Bruce raised his eyebrows at her and smirked. It was a convincing lie, he figured. It was even what he and Felicity had agreed to tell the team while Bruce got a feel for them. Apparently, that lie either lived on in history or Sara had a much better read on him and Felicity than Bruce had previously estimated.

“Well, when Queen needs saving, it’s very entertaining to watch him have to ask me.” Bruce admitted to the team, watching as Sara and Jax both bit back laughter.

“Ignore him, he thinks he’s funny.” Felicity said as she walked into the room.

“Ms. Smoak, if you wouldn’t mind, I believe it may be time to get to the matter at hand,” Dr. Stein looked her up and down in an assessing way. 

Felicity gave the doctor a dismissive look and turned to Rip. “I assume that you’re taking more than Sara’s word that I may be in contact with Batman, so I need to know why you believe that I can even send him a message--much less arrange a meeting.”

Rip’s lips twitched upwards into a small smile. “Well, as much as I do trust Sara’s word, history did give credit to her story. As we’ve told you, the identity of the Batman is never revealed, but there have been many references to a precursory vigilante alliance that was run by a hacker. At first, we believed that it was a hacker by the handle of Oracle, but they’re not yet active. However, you, Ms. Smoak, fit the profile well. We even have a list of the estimated vigilantes that you have been in contact with.”

“Arrow, Green Arrow, Red Arrow, Arsenal, Black and White Canaries,” Jax started listing the names on his fingers, making Felicity stand a bit straighter and raise an eyebrow at him. _Well at least history never realizes that the original Arrow and the Green Arrow are the same._ “Flash, Vibe, Batman, Nightwing, Red Hood, Robin, Vixen, Constantine, Zatanna, Catwoman--”

“And when were you going to tell me that you know Superman!?” Sara swatted Felicity’s arm. “I mean, even Laurel knew!”

“First of all, ow!” Felicity hit Sara’s bicep in retaliation. “Secondly, how did you think I met Lois? Third, when was I supposed to tell you? When you were dead? When you came back from the dead and avoided me like the plague!?”

“Maybe you could’ve told me _before_ I died!” Sara threw her hands into the air. “We dated for like--”

“Two weeks, Sara, we dated for two weeks--and for the majority of that time, you were MIA with the League!”

“But even before that, I thought we were friends! Remember? You even told me about that time in college when--” Sara’s words were cut off by Felicity forcing her hand over her friend’s mouth.

“I remember us agreeing never to speak of that again!” Felicity hissed.

“Alright, you two can go to a relationship counselor later,” Jax drew the attention back to the team and Bruce, who was hiding his amused smirk behind his hands, which were steepled in front of his mouth.

“Did you just lick my hand!?” Felicity screeched, tearing her hand away from Sara, who was sporting an especially smug look. “God, what are you, five!?” Felicity demanded as she looked around for something to wipe her off on. Bruce grabbed a napkin and held it up for her. She shot him a grateful look and crossed the room to clean off her hand before balling up the napkin and throwing it at the other blonde in the room.

“Ms. Smoak?” Rip raised both of his eyebrows at her.

“Right, my web of vigilantes.” Felicity nodded to herself and tilted her head back and forth. “One question: why the hell would I play all of my cards for you if I don’t know your strategy?”

Bruce and Sara both smirked to themselves at Felicity’s transformation from playful friend to hardass handler/hacker. Dr. Stein and Jax looked at each other before turning back to the blonde who suddenly captured the attention of the room. Rip, too, smirked. This was the Overwatch that history and Hourman had promised him.

“We want to make an alliance.” Rip explained to her. “With most of the heroes in this time, of course, but having the Batman on our side would lead to both of us having a good deal of credence. Other heroes in this time will trust us easier with the reclusive and independent Batman was one of our members.”

Felicity hummed and tapped her fingers against the table. “I’ve worked with these people for a long time, Captain Hunter.”

“Your point?”

“These big personalities aren’t exactly team players unless they need to be.” Felicity elaborated. “Batman being chief among them. He’s the personification of a loner who doesn’t want to admit that he needs people.” She blunty continued, not looking over at Bruce. “I, personally, agree with the idea of an alliance stretching across the globe, but how exactly is your team supposed to manage it?”

“What do you mean?” Stein crossed his arms over his chest and narrowed his eyes at her.

“We can handle a few big personalities,” Jax snorted in agreement with his other half.

“No, you can’t.” Felicity rebuttled. “The only reason your team functions is because of dumb luck and a bounty of flexible personalities. You haven’t come up against someone with an unwavering belief in something you disagree with. These heroes all have their own motivations and agendas, even the ones that don’t necessarily admit it. But the real reason you guys cannot conceivably manage this is that _you have your own mission_. If you want my endorsement for your band of Merry Men, think it through. How are you supposed to babysit over sixty heroes--because the number of active vigilantes today is closer to seventy or eighty--when you’re not even in this time?”

There was a thick silence as the Legends all looked to each other for answers. From Felicity’s description in media outlets and Ray’s and Sara’s stories, they hadn’t expected this. In about five minutes, the woman ripped apart their flimsy plan and threw it in their faces.

“Now, I’m not saying that this isn’t a good idea.” Felicity brought their attention back to her. “But I will not help you until you give me a legitimate strategy. And trust me, I’m not nearly as harsh as Batman. You’re lucky you got me instead of him.”

“Jesus, Cutie, you ripped them a new asshole and called them lucky for it.” Sara chuckled and crossed the room to hug her friend tightly. “I’ve missed you so much. I beat the egos out of them but I’m pretty sure they never get dressing downs like that except from their mothers.”

Felicity laughed and switched back into her easygoing friend mode. “Yes, well, working with Team Arrow really sharpened that skill for me.”

“Speaking of!” Sara put her hands on her hips and gave Felicity a serious look. “I think it’s about time that I kidnap you so we can catch up on a few things.”

Felicity sighed heavily and looked towards Bruce. “Save me, please.”

“I’m sorry, but you’ve already told everybody to ignore me, anyway.” Bruce smirked at her. “Alfred will want you back by dinner.”

“Alright, alright,” Felicity turned to the rest of the Legends team who all looked properly chastised. “I expect you all to take this time to figure your shit out. I’ll be back at seven.”

“Thirty.” Sara added.

“I’ll be back at seven thirty.” Felicity nodded and grabbed Sara’s hand as the assassin lead her out of the mansion.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> okay so two things:
> 
> 1) writing update - I have posted the first chapter of the Bucky story, and the second chapter of the Captain America story is already written and on it's way, I also updated "Maybe..." which is in this HDWEULT? extended universe
> 
> 2) I'm going through kinda a hard time rn and I'm gonna be pretty busy with birthday stuff next week so I don't know when I can update again. I don't wan y'all to be bogged down by my own personal drama, but tbh I can't really clear my head to write well rn and maybe not for a bit (which is going to SUCK tbh) so these series are gonna go on hiatus. many apologies.


	11. Girl Talk Is Real Talk

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Felicity and Sara discuss things and the business dinner begins

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey guys, I'm back. kinda. I'm still waiting on some things and I'm actually having surgery today (just some wisdom tooth troubles and such, no biggie) so I'm not really _off_ of hiatus, but I wrote this up in some of my free time and didn't want to leave you all high and dry for too long, otherwise you'd all just wonder off.
> 
> I'll be back for real soon, I hope.

“Sara?” Felicity laughed as they walked out of the manor, her hand firmly gripped in the assassin’s. “There’s one slight problem in your plan.”

“And what is that?” Sara asked, sending Felicity a questioning look in the middle of her examination of the grounds in front of the manor which were _impressive_ to say the least. And Sara grew up getting used to the Queen mansion. Wayne Manor made the Queen mansion look like a hotel in Monopoly.

“We don’t have a car.” Felicity raised an eyebrow at Sara.

“Oh, we’re not hitting the town. I mean, we could, but it seems like both of us have some serious catching up to do.” Sara dismissed the idea. “Tomorrow night, definitely. We’re getting dolled up and going to a dive bar and we’ll let a bunch of boozy truckers pay for our drinks for the confidence boost before dancing with their friends.”

“Yikes.” Felicity breathed out.

“No, but right now?” Sara’s grin grew wider as she stepped into Felicity’s space. “Now you’re going to take me to the Bat’s lair and we’re going to drown ourselves in the vintage bottle of whiskey I found stashed in the ship and we’re going to _talk_.”

Felicity squeaked in discomfort and watched Sara flounce off onto the ship. “It’s ten in the morning. Why am I never sober when you’re involved?”

“Hey, the first time was your own fault! Besides, it’s five o’clock somewhere!” The assassin declared, rummaging around in Rip’s office before letting out a triumphant noise and resurfacing with the whiskey.

“Yeah, your welcome for saving your life.” Felicity quipped and took the offered bottle. Looking closer to the label, it certainly looked aged, but boasted a liquor company that Felicity wasn’t familiar with and the year 2145. “Please tell me that the future of humanity cured hangovers.”

“Rip strongly suggests that we not drink during missions, so I, officially, have no idea, but after one or two drinking games with Jax, Kendra, and...Leonard, we’ve come to the conclusion that they have not.” Sara stumbled a bit over the last name, but offered Felicity an unconvincing smile afterwards. “We really need to talk.”

Felicity looked down at the bottle in her ringless left hand before looking back up at her friend and displaying her own false smile. “I know just the place.”

“You know what?” Sara looked around and grinned to herself. “Let’s mess around here for a while. I want to laugh before we dive in. So, join me in the shallow end?”

Felicity smiled gently. “Always, Sara. Whatever you need.”

*

“Holy shit,” Sara breathed out as she took in the Batcave. “I don’t know what’s more incredible: that there’s an honest to god fully assembled dinosaur skeleton in here, or the fact that Bruce mother fucking Wayne--the Batman, the Dark Knight, the crusader of justice in the mean streets of Gotham--named his lair as a pun.”

Felicity snorted. “Yeah, I know. I made fun of him for weeks after he let it slip. I swear to God I even made him blush at one point.”

“I don’t know if he’s genetically capable.” Sara shot back. “I heard stories of the Batman, you know? Not even the generic vigilante bullshit, but back when I was with the League. Nyssa’s sister had a real rage-on for him.”

“Doesn’t surprise me. Bruce’s little bat gets him into a lot of trouble.” Felicity shrugged before freezing in horror at her own words. “Oh God, never mind. Forget that. Forever. I never said that.”

Sara laughed and set the bottle of whiskey down on a table with a microscope on it before walking over to Felicity to wrap her into a firm hug. The other blonde happily returned the embrace and the two of them held each other for a beat.

“Alright,” Sara pulled away and breathed out, beginning to let out the tension that had been building up since she’d last actually spoken to her best friend. She pulled a quarter out of Felicity’s back pocket--lightly smacking her ass when Felicity let out a mock horrified gasp. “Heads I share first, tails you do.”

“Sounds fair.” Felicity agreed. She held up her finger to make Sara wait a minute while Felicity opened the bottle of whiskey and took a swig. The drink went down as smoothly as could be expected and Felicity winced before setting it back down on the table. “Okay, you can go now. I’m on my way to being okay to talk about it.”

“Same, girl, same.” Sara said absentmindedly as she flipped the coin.

“You’re meme trash.”

“I know.” Sara beamed and caught the coin, smacking it to the back of her hand before turning her hand over and pulling it away to reveal the decision:

Heads.

“My turn it is,” Sara murmured before she was being offered the bottle. She gratefully took a swig and grimaced. Gesturing to the stairs in the cave to where Bruce kept a workshop of sorts, she led Felicity over to the steps and they sat. “You know that song by Britney Spears? ‘Mama I’m in love with a criminal’?”

“Wow, that was somehow more romantic and tragic than the opening of Romeo and Juliet.” Felicity rose one eyebrow and spoke dryly.

“Well, looking at me and Captain Cold, you can’t expect romance.” Sara mused.

*

“Wow.”

“Yeah, I know.”

“I just...I mean...wow.”

“I know!” Felicity threw her hands in the air. “I still get a little annoyed everytime I even _think_ about it!”

Sara shook her head in amazement and swallowed another mouthful of whiskey. “And you still helped him?”

“Of course I did!” Felicity scowled. “I’m _nice_!”

“You are a better woman than I, Felicity Meghan Smoak.” Sara passed her the bottle. Felicity took a drink gratefully and gestured with the bottle in her tipsy hand.

“That’s not really true because it’s not like I’m some hero, but I mean, I was a fucking great fianceé, okay? After I got over my own issues, I was all in with that relationship!” Felicity sighed heavily.

Sara hummed doubtfully. “Well, I can see what you mean, but what about The Thing?”

“The thing?”

“No, _Thing_. Capital ‘T’, possibly a superscripted ‘TM’. The Thing™.”

“What Thing™?” Felicity asked, withholding the whiskey from Sara’s searching hand. “No, no more alcohol until you explain.”

“You know, The Thing™! The ‘you’re in love with Bruce’ Thing™!” Sara exclaimed.

Felicity gaped at her.

“What!?”

“You’re in love with Bruce,” The assassin repeated carefully.

“Wha- I don’t- I would never-” Felicity stumbled, her face turning beet red. “He’s my _friend_ and I- I have- I wouldn’t- who _told_ you!?”

Sara rolled her eyes and grabbed the whiskey out of Felicity’s now limp grip. “Hello? Highly trained assassin? Also a female who spent a good deal of her time pretending to be in love? Both with targets and teenage boys who would buy me things? I can see right through you, Cutie.” Sara shook her head and took a drink.

Felicity looked down at her nails and started picking at them as she processed. At least it wasn’t obvious, then. Just Sara knew, and that was only because she who she was. Okay, and Clark knew because of that one time he and Felicity had a feelings party. And Digg hinted at knowing, but he was just...perceptive. Yeah, perceptive. It’s not like Felicity and Bruce both moved in a circle of people known for their keen instincts and senses.

Felicity put her head in her lap and covered it with her hands.

She was fucked.

Sara let out a sympathetic hum and rubbed her back gently. “How long?”

“A little over six years.” Felicity answered without playing ignorant to the question for once.

“How long have you two known each other?”

“A little over six years.” She repeated, her tone filled with pent up sorrow.

“Have you ever--”

“Asked him to dinner.”

“When?”

“After the Undertaking.”

There was a beat of silence as Sara nodded in understanding. “Felicity...I watched the way that boy looked at you, and I cannot wrap my head around him knowingly turning you down. So, I’m going to ask a question that you may feel uncomfortable with: did he know that you were asking him out?”

“Of course he did!” Felicity pushed her hands out and sat up to give Sara a scathing look before looking off the the side and seeming to remember something. “Or...I think he did?”

“Uh huh!” Sara pursed her lips and leveled an accusatory finger at her friend. “You did it again!”

“I told you that story in confidence!” Felicity hissed.

“Okay, but you have to admit the parallels here! You are too subtle, my dear! You need to dress up, push up the girls, curl the hair, smoke the eyes, high the heels, and strut, girl! Make the moose a little bit crazy and then ask him when he’s being controlled by a _different_ head!” Sara advised, making Felicity turn redder with each word.

Felicity was shaking her head before Sara was even finished. “No way, Sara!”

“I’m thinking tomorrow is a great opportunity!” Sara continued, ignoring Felicity. “Girl’s night is always a glam thing, anyway! I’ll pick out your outfit, you pick out mine. If Bruce happens to have a stroke when he sees you, we’ll know--”

“No, Sara!” Felicity yelled, a serious frown on her face. Sara stilled and looked at Felicity, eyebrows raised in surprise. She’d never been on the receiving end of the Loud Voice, but she’d watched it, and this...was different. This is was almost vulnerable. “I don’t want to manipulate _anyone_ into a relationship with me! No matter how much I would love to be with Bruce, it needs to be a step both of us take with our eyes wide open. I don’t...I don’t want him to wake up the next morning with regrets. I don’t want to be a great weekend or vacation until reality sets in.

“And that’s the reality of it. I don’t want to be with another vigilante! I want to find a nice, _normal_ person who gets to know me because they want to know me, not because they want me to help them with their goddamn superhero missions!” Felicity admitted. “I want to feel special and loved for who I am, not what I can do! And even if I found a vigilante who could do that, I don’t like that feeling! That feeling like I could never be a part of every world they operate in! Like I’m just not good enough to understand everything and--”

“Felicity,” Sara breathed out as understanding washed over her. She pulled Felicity into her arms and let the other blonde cry quietly into her shoulder. “Honey, I think you’re scared. I think you don’t want to get hurt by secrets again, but that’s but a vigilante thing. That’s a human thing.”

“Humans?” Felicity let out a watery laugh. “Who needs ‘em?”

“Not you.” Sara smiled wryly. “Maybe. But we need you. And when you get to the right relationship, you won’t have to worry about that. I need you to listen to me right now, Felicity. There is nothing you could’ve done to make Oliver tell you about William. He chose that path, and his choice was not influenced by you. You are trustworthy, Felicity Smoak. There isn’t anything you did to start this.”

Felicity breathed out shakily. “I didn’t...I didn’t realize that I needed to hear that.”

“I know,” Sara shrugged. “But something tells me that you’ve been holding that in, or Bruce would’ve pick it up and told you in a heartbeat. Because I have faith in the two of you that you would be partners who trusted each other with everything. You already do.”

Felicity rolled her eyes. “You are really pulling for Bruce in this, aren’t you?”

Sara pursed her lips. “I’m pulling for your happiness. I’m pulling for love, because I can see the love between you two. I’m pulling for the least chance of someone breaking your heart because that man is already bending over backwards to love you.”

“Sara,” Felicity rolled her eyes and blushed. “I’m not ready.”

“That’s okay.” Sara pulled her back into the hug. “Take all the time you need, I’ll be right here.”

*

“Miss Felicity, Miss Sara,” Alfred smiled at the both of them as they walked into the dining room at 7:30 pm on the dot to see Bruce, Stein, Jax, and Rip all going over a poster board full of information right next to a very delicious looking dinner. “It’s nice to see you two. Your friends have been rather...busy at work.”

“Is Bruce going all perfectionist on them yet?” Felicity asked in a stage whisper as the other occupants in the room looked up at them.

“I resent that,” Bruce raised a single eyebrow at her, stepping around the table to discreetly hand her his handkerchief. He leaned down a little and dropped his tone so that only Felicity could hear him. “You have mascara under your eyes.”

Felicity smiled at him gratefully and wiped under her eyes, grimacing at the black that came off on the fabric. “Thank you. I’m good. Although, do I give this back now or do I wash it and?”

Bruce chuckled and plucked the handkerchief from her hand, but Sara piped up before he could. “You’re actually supposed to return the handkerchief clean. To offer someone a dirty handkerchief is rude.”

“I can manage,” Bruce clenched his jaw slightly at the interruption before seeing that Sara’s own condition mirrored Felicity’s.

_”It’s called a ‘Feelings Jambory’, Bruce. It’s a thing that normal people do when they need to catch up but everything is horrible,” Felicity informed him primly when he inquired about her puffy eyes after seeing her mother for the first time (in person) in years after graduating._

_“Does this make you and your mother normal people?” Bruce asked dryly, earning a smack to his bicep._

“Everything alright?” Rip asked, picking up on the girls’ states as well.

“Hunky dory,” Sara answered. “And on your end?”

“Ah, yes!” Stein smiled politely at Felicity. “Miss Smoak, I’m sure you will be pleased with our progress--”

“I’m sure that we can talk about it after we eat this nice dinner that Alfred worked so hard to prepare for us.” Felicity held up her hand to stop Stein. She sat down and looked up at Alfred. “It looks wonderful. Thank you, Alfred.”

“No, Miss Felicity, thank you. It was my pleasure,” Alfred spoke dryly, hiding the amusement that came with watching Felicity make even more power plays with this group.

The Legends looked at each other in mixtures of confusion, amusement, and annoyance. Sara shrugged and sat on one of Felicity’s sides, Bruce claiming the other. Jax looked between Stein and Rip before sitting across from Bruce and helping himself to the plate of food there. Stein looked strained as he sat across from Sara, but Felicity figured it was more about the lack of power the Legends had here than the actual proceedings themselves.

Rip narrowed his eyes scrutinizingly at Felicity before sighing in annoyance and plopping down in the seat across from him.

He continued to glare when Felicity smiled winningly at him.

This was gonna be...so much fun.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so, let me know if anything feels unfocused or forced or anything. I skipped a lot of the feelings talk between the blonde collective because I just couldn't really get it out, but I'll probably type it up as a bonus one of these days. I hope you guys liked it and as always thanks for reading!
> 
> <3
> 
> I hope I can return to my writing frenzy soon! I miss you guys!


	12. Strategies

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rip strategizes with Felicity's help. Bruce strategizes with no help from his ~feelings~

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the wait. I have no idea how long this chapter is because I wrote and posted it while using mobile, so who knows?
> 
> Hope u enjoy it!!!

Felicity’s hard blue eyes and unrelenting, calculating glare would’ve made even Bruce feel uneasy if he was to present a plan that he’d only worked on for an afternoon. As it was, Bruce could lean back and watch Rip Hunter as he tried to appear calm. Bruce could see him shuffling back and forth and gripping his hands into fists nervously, even though the time traveler tried to conceal it. He could tell that Felicity could see it, too.

He could also tell that he and Felicity weren’t the only ones enjoying a twitchy Rip Hunter. Sara was seated on Felicity’s other side, not even bothering to try and hide her gleeful expression.

“The infrastructure of your plan is impressive,” Felicity admitted after letting the silence go on for longer than Rip was comfortable with, the unsaid qualifier _for how long you’ve actually been working on this_ hung in the air like a thick fog. “But I’m concerned about how you’re going to get any sanctioning to do what you say you want to.”

“I was under the impression that vigilantes these days weren’t exactly concerned with government sanctions.” Rip moved one hand choppily as he gestured towards Sara. “Your past with the Arrow’s team alludes to that conclusion.”

“Maybe team Arrow--”

“We don’t call it that,” Sara interrupted, scrunching her nose up.

“--hasn’t always had the best relationship with the local government or cops. Superman, however, works with the locals. Gotham’s police department puts up a giant bat sign in the air so that Batman can meet with the commissioner. Flash works closely with the police department in Central City.” Felicity ignored Sara and continued. “You are proposing sticking a flag in the ground and pissing all around it to claim territory. You’re proposing what the governments of the world will see as a giant sword at their necks and what? What’s your game plan for this?”

Sara snorted and chimed in once more. “Ask nicely?” Bruce looked over at her from the corner of his eye. It was like having a constant sarcastic commentary on whatever happened all of the time. It almost made him miss Dick. The thought of the blonde assassin with his first sidekick, though...that was enough to turn that nostalgia into preemptive exasperation.

Rip looked between the two blondes and let out an annoyed sigh. “How would you propose we move forward, then?”

Bruce knew it was coming before he heard the words from the snarky assassin. “One foot in front of the other.”

“How much did you two drink?” Jax asked Felicity in amusement, earning a slight chuckle.

“I would say to start it up like a non-profit.” Felicity addressed Rip once more. “Set it up so that, from the outside, it looks as if you’re an organization that helps people through things like disaster relief. From there, recruit heroes to the shady underbelly so that you can also keep secret identities, you know, secret.”

“Shady underbelly?” Sara laughed.

Rip shook his head and gave Sara a glare. “I’m glad you find all of this oh so entertaining, Ms. Lance.”

“I do. I really do.” Sara grinned.

“The non-profit setup would be ideal.” Rip turned back to Felicity. “However, I do not know how to go about setting this up while we’re doing our own mission.”

“Plan.” Felicity ordered him. “Make your plan, then I will help you reach out to the heroes. I’d recommend starting with Batman and Superman--they both are viewed as leaders in this day and age, and are usually viewed by the public as forces for good. This will send the message to other vigilantes that you can get big personalities to work together, and if it comes out that we have an entire network of these assholes--” Sara snorted happily. “--it would keep the public’s trust and keep them calm to know that we’re taking the best of the best, the ones that they have faith in, and we’re putting them as senior members in position of authority.”

“So, what you’re saying is that you’ll help us?” Professor Stein looked at Felicity with raised eyebrows, making the blonde snort.

“I don’t see how you’d get a lot of these heroes without my endorsements.” She answered. “Now, I’m stealing Sara for a few weeks, the rest of you can come back then with a plan.”

*

“You’re keeping a stray assassin and ordering a team of time travelers to get their shit together?” Tim asked over the comms that night while he and Bruce went out on patrol. Sara had offered to help, but had been told to stay in the cave and get a handle on the dynamics of the team before going out with them. Currently, Robin was jumping across rooftops and Batman was interrupted a would-be mugging.

In between the sounds of fighting, Felicity hummed and held up three fingers for a beat before counting down on them. Right on cue, Bruce’s gruff voice came over the comms. “And you’re on patrol, Robin, focus.”

“That was scary accurate.” Sara raised her eyebrows, impressed.

“What was?” Tim asked.

“Nothing, Robin. Eye on the ball.” Felicity chimed in before an alert came up on one of her screens. She rolled over to the screen and tapped out a few commands before Sara saw a set of video feeds pop up on the screen. “Robbery in progress. Batman, you done with your scuffle? Because you’re closer to the jewelry store and Harley is looking especially greedy.”

“Where?” Batman grunted.

“Uploading the directions to your GPS.” Felicity replied, getting back to business.

“WC, you willing to give some actual information about what went down this evening?” Tim asked Sara.

Sara grabbed a spare chair and rolled over to Felicity’s workspace. “Whatcha wanna know, baby bird?”

“Who really ran things in that room? Was it Overwatch taking notes from Batman?”

“Overwatch, my dude. Completely and 100% Overwatch.” Sara answered. “You shoulda seen it. She beat up Rip’s little man ego and sent him to the curb.”

“Cut the chatter,” Bruce growled again.

“And Batman here just sat back and watched the queen conquer.” The blonde assassin continued. 

Felicity hummed and moved her chair next to Sara’s. She leaned forward and gently tapped Sara’s chin with her first finger. “Hey, did you enjoy the show?”

“Oh, I loved it,” Sara whispered hoarsely.

“Would you like to stick around for another one?”

“Yes, indeed, I would.”

“Then please cut the chatter.” Felicity requested, moving forward to kiss Sara’s nose before moving back over to her screen.

“Now that’s just teasing!” Sara complained.

Tim coughed. “What uh...what just happened?”

“Daddy Bat is almost done stopping Harley Quinn,” Felicity reported. “But you should head over and assist, Robin.”

“Daddy Bat and Baby Bird, on the case.” Sara chirped.

*

Felicity sleeping at her workstation was the first thing Bruce saw when he and Tim got back to the cave. With an amused look on her face, Sara silently put her pointer finger to her lips to tell Tim and Bruce to keep quiet. Tim snorted as he and Bruce went to change out of their gear. By the time they got back, Sara was layering sticky notes over Felicity’s face.

Still not quite sober, then.

Bruce quietly ordered Tim to show Sara to her room--dismissing both pouting faces before systematically removing the eighteen sticky notes for Felicity’s serene face. Knowing that he had more work to do--checking up on Ivy and Joker now that Harley was back in the game--he decided to allow Felicity at least another half hour of uninterrupted sleep. In a _completely_ platonic move, Bruce grabbed a blanket from a cot and draped it over Felicity’s shoulders.

He worked silently, as always, but his focus had been shot since the day before--and _Jesus_ , it had only been a single day--when Superman had easily informed Bruce of his missed chance and Bruce had realized the feeling in his chest that he’d been ignoring for so long.

A part of his brain couldn’t help but wonder. He couldn’t help running the scenarios, the different possibilities of what could’ve happened if he’d only realized this sooner--back when Felicity was actually emotionally available and, if Kent was to be believed, returned the affection. There was more than a good chance that they would’ve crashed and failed--he would never move to Starling and Felicity wouldn’t be happy with the expectation that she’d have to be the one giving in. They would both be difficult people, Bruce more than her, of course, but both of them nonetheless. 

What would they have even talked about on a date? Bruce knew Felicity better than he knew himself. He knew everything about her from her preferred manicure type, to the story behind the scar on her right knee the length of Bruce’s middle finger, to exactly how angry she was but covered behind a smile and a bouncy ponytail. And for every inch of Felicity that he was allowed to see, she memorized miles of him. She had names for his different voices and masks. She could take one look at him and tell more than any experienced psychic could try.

He loves her, oh how Bruce loves her. Felicity can take one look at him and tear him open to find the raw beating heart he hid so carefully within. She made him feel so vulnerable sometimes, but safe at the same time. No wonder he hadn’t noticed himself falling--he had more faith than he’d admit that she’d catch him.

And maybe if he’d only noticed years ago that he’d had a chance at happiness--maybe not the happy ending that she so deserved but maybe, just _maybe_ a happy middle--he could’ve seized it. They might’ve ended up fighting, he might’ve ended up causing her grief and heartache but there was also a chance that they would’ve been _happy_. He had the chance to make her smile that blinding smile and laugh until she snorted and sweep her into his arms and--

And he’d lost it, instead.

And that hurt more than any bullet, knife, or fire he’d ever experienced. This whole unrequited love routine was _bullshit_. It wasn’t a waiting game--it was rigged. And Bruce, the poor ass that he was, was already addicted to Felicity. And maybe he’d blown his chance with her romantically, but that didn’t mean that he wouldn’t protect her happiness with everything inside of himself.

Felicity deserved Prince Charming. A Prince Charming who would respect and appreciate her, whose brokenness wouldn’t manifest in glass shards inside of his soul that could only hurt her, who would give her everything she deserved and more.

Bruce was a knight. He was in love with her, but he couldn’t ask for more than she’d give. He would loyally stay by her side, but he would never be enough for her. She was sunlight and unrestrained smiles and giggle snorts. Bruce was darkness and clenched jaws and screams of pain and fear.

They didn’t match.

Suddenly the ‘moth to flame’ analogy seemed so much more relatable.

Still, Bruce chastised himself for spending so long allowing these _feelings_ to distract him from his work. Taking a quick look at his watch-- _5:12 AM_ \--he decided to call it a night. He made his way over to Felicity’s snug form and gently nudged her shoulder. She woke up slowly-- _adorably_ a small part of him spoke before getting smothered by the other parts of him.

“Hey, Felicity,” Bruce prodded her awake. “Come on, you can’t sleep down here.”

Felicity groaned and sat up, blinking sluggishly behind her skewed glasses. “Bruce?”

Allowing only an amused smirk at her cuteness, Bruce nodded. “Yes, Felicity, it’s me.”

“What am I doing down here?”

“Going back upstairs to go to bed.”

“Oh,” Felicity nodded at the suggestion and pulled herself up--barefoot, the realization spurring him to grab her discarded heels as she tottered over to the elevator in front of him. She held the blanket around her shoulders in a precious parody of a cape. Once they were both in the elevator, Felicity leaned against Bruce’s arm tiredly. “‘M sorry for making all those decisions for you today.”

Bruce raised his eyebrows down at her, belatedly recognizing the signs that she’d been worried about his reaction all night. “Don’t worry about it. I support all of what you said. And it was fun watching you like that.”

“Like what?” Felicity asked, almost amused.

“Like a hard ass.” Bruce spoke matter of factly, glancing down at her from the corner of his eye to let her know that it was a joke. He was rewarded with a soft snort that made a deep part of him purr in delight.

They lapsed into silence once more before Felicity spoke again. “Wasn’t exactly the vacation you’d wanted me to take, huh?”

Bruce snorted. “Not even a little bit.”

“Next time we might wanna leave the country.”

“They’d follow you. You’re apparently a hot commodity.”

“Bruce Wayne!” Felicity fake gasped. “Did you just called me hot?”

Bruce finally turned to look down at her and gave her an exaggeratedly flirty look. “If the shoe fits, Ms. Smoak.”

Felicity dissolved into giggles into his side, grabbing his arm for stability.

Yeah, he could live the rest of his life like this. This was all he needed.

(God, he wanted to kiss her.)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay so real quick: I broke my laptop and my mom broke our family computer not to mention I'm going into my senior year on Monday, so I may not update in a while! Sorry for the inconvenience.
> 
> I would like to remind a few readers of this, though:
> 
> I make this content for free. Nothing requires me to do this. The story is not written for anybody, it is shared with everybody. I love everyone who reads this story, and by no means do I want to imply that every consumer of fanfictions are dicks, but please do not act like this is my job or like you're entitled to more content. I know that you guys are just eager, but please be polite and knowledgably as to how your comments sound. "Update asap!!!!" kinda comes off a little cringey, my dudes.
> 
> Again, this only applies to a few of you. The majority of these comments are amazing and uplifting and so kinda they sometimes make me cry. I love and appreciate all of you very much. And I'm not singling anyone out either! I've just noticed this trend in my own and other people's stories and wanted to address it.


	13. Take My Hand

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

“I have a feeling that I’m going to fight someone if you do not surrender your afternoon to me right this instant, and I have a feeling that that person will be highly trained and will kick my ass,” Felicity declared as she waltzed into Bruce’s home office. “You know, going off of the fact that I will most likely fight someone I know and for some reason I only know vigilantes.”

“Why are you going to fight someone?” Bruce asked, trying to seem more distracted by his paperwork than he was.

“Because Sara’s pissing me off with her poking and prodding,” Felicity sighed heavily.

Bruce furrowed his eyebrows. “What did you not tell her when she got here that she needs to know today?”

Felicity waved her hand dismissively. “Nothing, I just got touchy about it and now Sara thinks that she’s my therapist and I already agreed to spending tonight with her, but you, my dear best friend, can save me from her until then.”

Bruce finally looked up from the new ‘R&D’ designs on his tablet that Lucius had sent him. “I thought you were dedicating today to researching the kryptonite.”

The corner of Felicity’s mouth quirked downwards in a way that Bruce knew meant she was stumped on a problem. (It wasn’t at all adorable.) “I need some time away from it, I think. I’m still running possibilities, but it’s hard to when Sara’s psychoanalyzing me. The only reason I got out of the cave without an extra blonde is because Tim is a godsend. He challenged her to a spar. My hero. Besides, I’m thinking of sending the kryptonite to STAR labs. Make Cisco tear his hair out so I don’t have to swindle him into getting a haircut.”

Bruce raised his eyebrows and smiled slightly at the thought of his adopted son and Felicity getting along. Which was...not the point, he reminded himself. “I need to head over to WE at some point today to discuss something with Lucius and try to figure out where a virus in our system came from, but after that I’m free.”

“I can help with your virus problems.” Felicity volunteered before Bruce could even finish his thought.

“Vacation. You lost your vacation last month, you said you’d make up for it with today’s day off.”

“But it’d be easy!” Felicity pouted while Bruce stood and started leading her towards the garage. “It wouldn’t even really be work.”

Bruce smirked down at her, amused. “Oh, it wouldn’t?”

“Nope! Because you won’t be paying me.” She pointed out, tucking her hand into Bruce’s elbow as they walked. (Not that Bruce cared or valued the contact at all.) 

“I won’t be?”

“Hell no.”

“But you’d be performing a service for me.”

Felicity waved her hand again. “You don’t have to pay me for servicing you.”

Bruce bit the inside of his bottom lip hard to stop himself from laughing (or enjoying the mental picture) as he watched Felicity’s face contort into a mixture of disbelief, shame, and embarrassment. They both had stopped walking the second the sentence left Felicity’s mouth, and now they stood in the middle of the hall, Bruce on the edge of a laughing fit and Felicity trying her hardest to will the ground to swallow her whole.

“Well that’s kind of you to offer,” He teased in a slightly strangled voice.

“Shut up.”

“I wouldn’t have thought you were the type--”

“Shut up.”

“I mean--”

“Shut. Up.”

“It’s really nothing to be ashamed of--”

Felicity pressed her nails into Bruce’s arm and used her other hand to pull him down by the collar of his shirt so that they were nose to nose. “Not a word, Wayne.”

“This isn’t helping your denial.” Bruce’s eyes sparkled with mischief as he spoke, which was the only reason the Felicity let him off easy and simply flicked his collarbone. The flick, apparently, was all that was necessary to break him as his shoulders immediately started shaking with laughter. Ignoring his amusement, Felicity leaned forward to press her forehead into Bruce’s shoulder--hiding from the entire world in his chest.

She did not revel in it when Bruce brought his free hand up to press against the top of her back.

“I cannot believe I just offered to service you,” Felicity shook her head again, reflecting on just how _horrible_ her brain was to her.

“And even said I didn’t have to pay.” Bruce chimed in, his embrace comforting even as he teased her. Her weight against him relaxing in a way he knew he didn’t deserve.

_I could stay like this all day._

Easing herself away, Felicity grabbed his hand to lead him down to the garage. “Come on, I think I just earned the right to help you with your virus.”

“We’ll see about that,” Bruce answered, a small smile on his lips.

*

“Alright, so we got them to get out together,” Tim announced as he and Sara watched a car pull out of the car with both Bruce and Felicity together, Felicity chatting animatedly about...anything probably.

“Can I just bring up how fucking creepy it is that Bruce has installed cameras all over this place?” Sara leaned against the monitors and crossed her arms over her chest. “By the way, you owe me twenty bucks.”

“You swindled me. I didn’t know that by annoying her into wanting to leave you were going to include _threatening to lick her_ ,” Tim protested, but dug out his wallet anyway. “What does a dead woman need with twenty dollars, anyway?”

“I need _something_ to buy a girl a drink tonight.” Sara shot back.

“About that--abandon her tonight.” Tim instructed, earning a raised eyebrow. “Please?”

“Better. Watch your tone, kiddie. Why do I need to abandon her at a gay club?” Sara asked. “You want her to come home with a girlfriend and a cat?”

Tim snorted. “I have two questions, but I’ll get back to them. I need to to abandon her because Bruce will be patrolling over there tonight and he’ll see her alone and demand to give her ride and ‘make sure she’s okay’. Now, first, why are you two going to a gay club?”

“Because I have a deep spiritual need for a quickie with a redhead. Why the air quotes around ‘make sure she’s okay’?”

“Because Bruce realized that he loves Felicity already. Did you call this place ‘home’ because Felicity’s called it ‘home’?”

“Yes, she’s called it home. You think he’s that self aware?”

Tim shrugged. “It’s a 50/50 chance, but I like to have faith. Interesting, though.”

Sara narrowed her eyes at Tim. “Why is that interesting?”

“Home is where the heart is,” Tim answered with a pleased smile. “This bodes well for Operation Bats and Blondes.”

Sara tilted her head and studied the kid in front of her. “You’re a truly terrifying individual, Timmy-Tim.”

Tim chuckled. “Back at ’cha. I’ll text you when you need to ditch her.”

“I don’t feel good about that.” Sara shook her head. “Gotham’s dangerous. Felicity is a danger magnet. One time I had to break a guy’s hand at a bar because he was getting too touchy and she didn’t notice that he was flirting.”

“Are gay girls as aggressive as men are towards her?” Tim asked, tilting his head consideringly.

“Usually people assume that we’re together and don’t fuck with her, but if I’m going to be looking, I want to know that she’ll be okay.” She moving her hands as she spoke. Tim hummed and nodded.

“Alright, I’ll text you when he’s close enough to make sure that she’s okay while making sure that you have time to ditch her. We’ll eliminate most of the variables.” Tim nodded once again and smiled up at Sara. “Trust me, Canary. Felicity’s like family. I wouldn’t do anything to hurt her.”

Sara looked into his eyes searchingly before shaking her head. “You and me and all of the other poor lost souls she’s taken in.”

“‘Beacon of hope for all who are lost.’” Tim’s mouth quirked up as he repeated the words that Bruce and Jason and even Alfred had uttered about the hacker.

“True shit.” Sara nodded, picking at her nails. “I think that’s why Oliver relied on her so much. She was good for him--and he was good for her, on the whole--but once Oliver allowed himself to grow emotionally and Felicity grew harder, he didn’t really need her anymore and she didn’t need to be needed anymore. I think they needed that experience, though, you know? A successful relationship, in my opinion.”

Tim looked over at her from the corner of his eyes. “I thought that in order be successful, a couple should get married or something.”

“Really, Timmy?” Sara raised her eyebrows. “No, hun. A relationship is successful when the two people involved grow and become better versions of themselves. A soulmate may not be forever. A soulmate may not even be right now. Everything about your life should be about making yourself and your experience better. 

“You spend time with the people that can do that. Sometimes, though, you can’t. You’re not good for them or circumstances come into play. Sometimes the two of you grow into people who are just no longer good for each other. That doesn’t mean that everything that you’ve done together and every part of you that was changed is now inherently unsuccessful. Life means change. Relationships mean positive change. In all of its aspects.” Sara gave the younger vigilante a small smile. “Trust me, just because it’s not happily ever after doesn’t mean it can’t be happy right now.”

Tim tilted his head to the side and took Sara in once more. Sara had watched him do this specific move a few times since she got here. He had had to reevaluate his opinion on her once again, apparently.

“I guess it makes sense,” Tim accepted. “That we would think about these two things differently. Not sexuality-wise, but as people with different life experiences.”

“Because I’m a time traveler?” Sara guessed.

“Child of divorce.” Tim shrugged.

Sara huffed out a strangled laugh. “Ouch. Pull a punch, please.”

Tim smiled. “You’re pretty tough. I think you can take it.”

*

After stopping off at Wayne Enterprises--where Felicity solved his virus project while Bruce was meeting with Lucius so he couldn’t do anything about it (take that, Bruce!)--the pair decided to go to a museum that Bruce had only been to when someone was stealing something or trying to look like the best socialite possible by hosting a benefit. He’d realized that he hadn’t taken nearly enough time to stop and appreciate anything about it when he saw the way Felicity lit up at the sight of a sculpture that had been donated.

Then again, Bruce had never really seen this part of the museum. At Felicity’s insistence, they had decided to start their visit in the ‘local artists’ section. It was never a section that was really targeted or attractive to Gotham’s high class because of the fact that local artist meant not at all prestigious. He wasn’t going to tell that to Felicity, though. It had taken her long enough to become comfortable being _friends_ with individual rich people while still resenting the social policies in reaction to and allowing it.

“This piece is amazing,” Felicity breathed out. “It looks like it took a lot of Spanish Renaissance influences, but it’s definitely a modern piece. It’s like a meeting of cultures.”

“I’ve never asked you how you know so much about art.” Bruce realized, surprised a bit at himself.

“Well,” Felicity tilted her head to the side, hands behind her back as she moved over to a painting on the wall of a little dark haired girl wearing a happy grin and a beautiful white dress in a field of flowers and cherry blossoms. “My mom likes to paint. It was kinda always a thing with her. She wanted me to be an artist so badly, but I have as much talent in my entire body as she has in her little toe. For art, at least. I did some research when I was fourteen, though. I wanted to give some...hope I guess. For while I was at MIT. I gave her this packet about museum policies towards local artist and art that was, statistically, most like to fetch a fair price. I wanted her to be taken care of.”

Bruce graced her with a small smile while his mind screamed at his heart with all of its might to just _shut the hell up, please, she’s my best friend._ “That was thoughtful of you.”

Felicity was quiet for a beat before revealing something he hadn’t expect in a voice near to a whisper. “I don’t I’ve ever seen her cry as much as she did that day. At least not until we got kidnapped by Cooper.” Bruce was at Felicity’s side, closing the sorry distance between them before she could even blink. He pressed his hand into the small of her back supportively, but stayed silent, his gaze trained carefully on her face. “She cried because she couldn’t understand how I didn’t understand art wasn’t a market. I...we traded some harsh words after that, but it stuck with me, that I needed to be more open to the things around me that I thought I knew.”

Bruce nodded supportively. “I’m sorry that I brought it up.”

“No, don’t be.” Felicity’s voice was strained, but Bruce knew that the emotions weren’t directed at him. “You’re the person I trust the most in the world. I just feel bad that I keep unloading on you.”

 _Fuck_ , he wanted to kiss her then. He wanted to grab her face between his hands and kiss her more than he wanted to _breathe_. He wanted to bury his fingers in her hair and pull her up to him, he wanted her to be on her toes and he wanted her fingernails scraping at the hair on the nape of his neck. He wanted to show her how much he _loved_ that trust and reciprocated. How much he loved her and yearned for her to reciprocate it.

He wanted…he couldn’t.

_Fuck._

_**Fuck!** _

“You never have to apologize to me, Felicity,” He settled on instead, ignoring his heart breaking into a thousand pieces. Felicity smiled up at him dazzlingly and went on her toes (fuck) and placed a hand on his shoulder for balance (fuck, fuck) as she loved to press a kiss to Bruce’s cheek (fuck, fuck, fuck). Bruce blinked sluggishly, feeling as if he was watching from outside of his body while Felicity wiped off the lipstick print from his cheek with her thumb.

_Fuck, fuck, fuckity--_

Moving on instinct, Bruce grabbed her hand and move her face towards her to press a gentle kiss to the pad of the offending thumb. Felicity stared up at him with wide eyes, but his mind had been overpowered by his heart. He wasn’t able to regain control before he found himself looming over Felicity, moving ever closer to her--close enough for their noses to brush if he tilted his head just a tad.

The only thing that brought him back was Felicity’s breathy (FUCK) voice calling his name like a question.

Changing course at the last second, Bruce pressed a lingering kiss to Felicity’s cheek and pulled away quickly, abandoning her hand. He cleared his throat and tried to ignore what he just almost did--the friendship he almost threw away. “Figured I should repay the service.”

He nearly winced at the sound of his own voice, and if it he didn’t moonlight as fucking _Batman_ he would’ve. He sounded as wrecked as he felt. As wrecked as she’d sounded before, his heart reminded him. And, oh boy would _that_ haunt him.

“We should--” Felicity started in a weak voice before clearing her throat a couple of times, “We should look around some more. I want to know more about Gotham’s culture. Yeah, culture. That’s- that’s a safe topic. Well, maybe ‘safe’ isn’t necessarily a word one would associate with Gotham, but I meant to say that I wouldn’t start almost crying and there wouldn’t be any servicing involved and I actually think I need to head to the ladies room? Yes, the ladies room where I need to...powder...my nose? Yeah. Yes, yeah. I’ll um be right back. Stay here, though. Don’t- don’t leave, I’ll be- I’ll be right back.”

Bruce watched, voiceless, as Felicity babbled was scrambling to get away. He’d almost be amazing at how shitty the lie was and how frazzled she was if he himself wasn’t vastly grateful for the space she’d allowed them to have. Without waiting for a response, Felicity fled. He kept his eyes on her until he left his field of vision, but even when he closed his eyes, he could see her face--close enough to count her eyelashes and the freckles on her skin that she tried so hard to cover with concealer. He could hear her voice and feel her breath against his lips as she breathed out in surprise at how close he was and--

_**Fuck, fuck, shit, fuckity, goddamnit, fuck, FUCK.** _

He’d promised himself that he wouldn’t let this get out of hand. He’d decided that he wouldn’t let this get in the way of his and Felicity’s friendship. Sure, it’d been nearly two months since she’d left her fiancé (and ran straight into Bruce’s arms) but that was not nearly enough time for her to be ready to move on, much less with someone just like the man she was moving away from.

_I’m not like Queen, I’d know better--I’d know to cherish her because I already know how excruciating it is to stop being near her for only a few months. I wouldn’t lie to her. I would never lie to her._

As much as he seemed to have problems lying to her, he had no such qualms with himself apparently.

 _I can’t give her the life she deserves. I can be what she deserves._ Bruce sat down on a nearby bench and rested his elbows on his knees, dangling both her hands and head as he let out the sigh to end all sighs. _What am I thinking? It’s not even like she would even love me. I’m more broken than anyone else she’s ever met. I’m shards of glass that cut away anything that could help me._

_What about what Kent said? What about the fact that Felicity _did_ want to be with him? What about that?_

_Forget that, that happened too long ago to just assume that she still feels the same. She’s different now. I’m different now. I can’t assume that she still loves me like that--if she ever really did and it wasn’t just a passing thought._

_You know Felicity wouldn’t put herself out there like that for a passing thought, you paperclip._ Bruce winced at his own thought. He really needed to stop listening to Tim and Sara’s quip-offs. He liked being out of the loop when it came to new trends and jokes because Felicity would always tease him about it and he didn’t have that luxury when Tim loudly yelled at Sara about what the proper definition of _’sinnamon roll’_ was.

_Dammit._

Ever since Felicity had moved to Gotham, she’d been everywhere in his life, and before Clark fucking Kent rudely waltzed in and shoved self awareness into Bruce’s face, Bruce had _loved it_. He’d loved spending time with his best friend because it was easy, because even though he was a textbook introvert, he could regain energy by being alone with Felicity. She was quiet when he needed it and babbling when he needed it. She was calm and steady, but she was still so in tune with her emotions.

She _trusted_ him. And god help him, he’d trusted her since he first walked into her college dorm, saw her graphic t-shirt, and listened to her predict his usual coffee order without meaning to.

He’d been in love with that tiny blonde nerd since she first startled a laugh out of him and lord help him, now he _knew_ it and everything just got so exponentially _harder_. He’d allowed Sara to take over Felicity’s self-defense training (as if he’d had a choice in the matter once Sara took one look at the plan Bruce had made for Felicity and shook her head while speaking one word: a decisive ‘no’), he’d given up the morning runs (feigning to be too busy), he’d stopped eating breakfast with Felicity before she’d leave for work (it didn’t stop him from finding his mug with a lipstick stain on it every once in awhile).

He’d basically had to sacrifice all of the things that he’d been looking forward to when he realized that Felicity’s stay at the mansion would be for longer than a rebound. He’d made these sacrifices for her, for their friendship, and for his own sanity, because he wasn’t sure Felicity realized just how fucking _adorable_ she was. It felt like everything she did was exponentially more Felicity-like and thus made him fall deeper in love with her. And every time he slipped deeper down that cliff, he forgot about all of the things holding him back.

Until she retreated and he was left, alone with his thoughts: his mind and his heart at war.

If there was one thing that the entirety of his brain could agree on it was that love? Yeah, that shit fucking _sucks_.

*

Felicity basically ran into the restroom, uncaring of how she looked to the other woman at the sink who was touching up her makeup.

“You alright, babe?” The woman asked gently, pushing her hair over one shoulder.

“I’m great. I just--” Felicity took a deep breath before spotting the badge on the woman’s belt. “Boy problems. Nothing that requires a detective. Unless, of course, you wouldn’t mind telling my feelings that they have the right to remain silent.”

The edge of the woman’s mouth quirked upward. “Sorry, I am uniquely unequiped to help. Piece of advice, though: straight people always tend to make things more complicated than they need to be.”

That startled a laugh out of Felicity. “Yeah, all of the straight guys I’ve dated have definitely been more likely to describe a relationship as ‘it’s complicated’. Same for that one straight girl in high school, but we’ve all been there. Honestly, I try not to complicate things too much, but sometimes it just...is.”

The woman nodded in understanding and held out her hand. “I’m Renee, by the way. Montoya.”

“Felicity Smoak.” The blonde answered and gripped her hand in a friendly shake (because fuck limp wrist handshakes).

“I know.” Renee offered her a sympathetic smile when Felicity’s disposition turned from openly friendly to suspicious. “I read about your rise to power and subsequent accident. It was a good piece. I still can’t quite figure out why Lois Lane wanted to write an article about something that wasn’t a giant political conspiracy--that’s pretty much where she’s strongest.”

“Lois is a friend,” Felicity answered, still slightly suspicious but willing to give Renee a chance. “She wanted to draw attention to Darhk’s victims and the human lives affected by him before her exposé about him came out. She second guessed herself a lot about using me to make the cause seem more humane but I agreed with what needed to happen.”

“That makes sense. I read the other article, too. I’m happy that he’s in jail.” Renee commented. “I joined the force to make sure that people are held accountable for their actions. It was beyond rage worthy to learn what was happening in Star.”

Felicity smiled wryly. “Yes, well, I sorta ran away before I could really help.”

“But your story did help.” Renee corrected her, suddenly losing her easy going, if somber, aura and adopting a determined, no-nonsense one instead. “And I’m not saying this to make you feel good, but you brought attention to this issue. You’re literally an American Dream success story. You went from a Vegas child of divorce to one of the first female CEOs in the technology market--and definitely the first female, paralyzed CEO. You revealed the savagery that was happening in Star. There was a hashtag of your name trending internationally while you were in the hospital.”

Felicity blinked slowly.

Well, that she hadn’t expected. She’d disassociated more than ever while she was in the hospital and in the days just afterward. It was amazing she could remember what she did in between her pain pills and the mental toll it took from becoming _paralyzed_ in order to teach someone else a lesson. (And that’s still something she tried not to think about. She wasn’t even paralyzed for her own movement against Darhk, it was because Oliver had publicly decided to love her. She couldn’t even _pretend_ that her injury was about her.)

But being a hashtag? Being an inspiration? She hadn’t taken notice because she’d buried herself in her work. She could vaguely recall Laurel telling her that was a story the world wouldn’t soon forget about, but she had figured Laurel was just being supportive.

“I didn’t know that.” Felicity admitted. “I um...I--”

“It’s okay.” Renee stepped towards Felicity. “I didn’t mean to bring up those traumatic memories, just...I wanted you know that you’re a hero. I’m pretty sure that you’re not the Canary or the Red Arrow or some other vigilante, but you’re a hero. I don’t know, I just...I just want you to know that. That came out of left field for you, probably. I’ve just...sorta wanted to meet you since I read that article and tell you that.”

Felicity bit the inside of her cheek to stop herself from crying at how many feeling were overwhelming her at the moment. First her mind tricking her into think that Bruce was going to kiss her and now this. “I’m...happy that you told me. It’s a nice thing to hear. Just...a little overwhelming, I guess.”

Renee winced. “Yeah, I probably came on too strong with it. It’s...my little brother. He’s in a chair, too. Drive by. The doctors say he’ll be able to walk again in a few years, if he’s lucky. He cried when he read about you because you didn’t let your chair stop you. You gave him hope. I’ve wanted to thank you for that.”

“You don’t have to.” Felicity shook her head fiercely. “I’m not anyone special, I just have enough connections that I’m not easily ignorable. It’s not easy, but my time of being paralyzed was basically five minutes because I happen to have a brilliant friend. I’m working to help people like your brother and others, but I don’t deserve credit until I’m done.”

Renee smiled, surprised and pleased. “Alright, I’m done fawning over you, don’t go all humble and make me develop more of a crush.” Felicity laughed, a genuinely happy expression crossing her face that left Renee feeling pleased with herself. “Alright, girly, now that we’ve bonded how about you tell me why you were so down when you came in here? You can trust me: I’m just a charismatic stranger with a gun.”

Renee’s smile grew as Felicity snorted out another laugh. “You make it a habit of being a bathroom therapist?”

“Why the fuck not? It’s easy to tell a stranger your problems. You’ll never see me again and I’m completely outside of your situation so I’m unbiased when I tell you my opinion on it. Also, I’m nosy.”

“And the truth comes out.” Felicity joked slightly. She looked at Renee for a bit before started. “Well, let’s just say that--hypothetically--I have a friend who’s in love with their best friend. And the two people are pretty much both emotionally unhealthy. The friend just got out of a year long relationship and their best friend is serially single because of a demanding job. And they’ve been close for years, but the best friend is only just now showing interest and the friend is worried that they might be misinterpreting signals.”

Renee nodded and crossed her arms as she thought about it. “How’s a normal interaction between these two completely hypothetical people like?”

“Playful banter, emotional confessions, supportive silence.”

“Elaborate on the first two.”

“Playful banter in the form of coffee stealing--”

“Flirting on both parts if the victim of the theft continues to allow the thief to steal. It means that they’re willing to give something up to be together. The stealing means that they want something. Actively against the stealing would mean the victim isn’t willing to give anything up.” Renee interpreted easily.

Fuck, that made sense. “Accidental innuendos and constant teasing about it.”

“Teasing in the abstract about the sexual nature can be platonic teasing. Teasing in the hypothetical of the two people together means that you’d- they’d, my bad, be willing to at least think about a sexual relationship.”

“Emotional confessions like childhood secrets and feelings that they don’t share with anyone else.”

“How are these confessions delivered?”

“Like the friend doesn’t even have to think about it to hell the best friend anything.” Felicity smiled sadly. “Relief flooding in every time they open their mouth and realize that they can trust their best friend with their secrets. It doesn’t feel like a hardship, they don’t have to plan it and build up courage to talk about it. It just happens.”

Renee nodded and tilted her head with a face that very clearly delivered her thoughts on that. (If she was Sara, she’d have said ‘you’re fucked, cutie’ but Renee seemed a tad more tactful.) “Total love and trust. Doesn’t have to be platonic but necessary for a romantic relationship. How are they received.”

“Like a letter that wasn’t expected but always welcome. Like a gift on an anniversary you forgot about,” Felicity answered, losing herself as she thought back to the way Bruce always seemed so honored to listen to her bitch and moan about her past. “He’s always surprised, but would never stop me. He treats each confession like something precious to protect--to keep close and always remember.”

“That’s because he thinks of you as someone precious. He wants you to stay close and be protected. He wants to remember every moment with you.” Renee decided with a small smile. “You two sound sickeningly in love.”

Felicity ducked her head and blushed. “I don’t know--”

“How do you act around each other? Physically? Is there ever more than a foot of distance between you?” Renee asked, reminding Felicity was the fact that, oh yeah, she was talking to someone who interrogated people for a living. “Can you be in the same room without gravitating towards each other? Do you ever think that he gets tired of your company? Do you ever feel him looking at you when you look away?”

Felicity closed her eyes and dug her thumb nail into her pointer finger--a bad habit that she’d picked up from being around too many archers, thank you very much. “I can’t- I can’t answer that without getting my hopes up and I’ve had my fair share of disappointment this year.”

Renee nodded in understanding. “You can say that now, girly, but I’m guessing you already tried to suppress this. It’s not just going to go away because you frown at it. The heart wants what the heart wants.”

“But- but I fell in love with someone else while I still loved him so I can’t--” Felicity took a deep breath and looked up at Renee with pleading eyes. “Is that even possible? To really love two people at the same time? Because I did. I was with one of of them but I loved them both.”

“Polyromanticism is completely fine, Felicity,” Renee assured her. “Also, can I just say that I’m psyched to be the first person you come out to as a polyromantic?”

Felicity laughed through the tears and nodded. “It has a name? It’s a real thing?”

“Yes, girly. It’s very real and very okay.” The detective smiled gently as a few tears escaped down Felicity’s face. She could see as a burden seemed to remove itself from the blonde’s shoulders. “Do you want a hug?”

“Yes,” Felicity admitted timidly, earning a short laugh and strong arms around her shoulders.

“I didn’t mean to make you cry.”

“I didn’t mean to cry. This day is just overwhelming. I promise you that I don’t usually cry to strangers about my romantic problems...okay, well this is actually my second time doing this so maybe I’m developing an unhealthy habit.” Felicity mumbled into Renee’s crisp dress shirt. She pulled away and turn to the mirror to wipe away the mascara tracks on her cheeks. “Goddammit, now Bruce is going to know that I was crying. He’s gonna blame himself, too.”

“Eh, let him sweat.”

“Are you on duty, Detective?”

“Yes, I am, actually. I’m waiting from the curator to get here to question him.” Renee answered. “There was an incident a few nights ago that I want to take a closer look at.”

“Well, good luck, Renee.” Felicity smiled gratefully at her. “Here, give me your phone and I’ll put my number in it. I’m not hitting on you, but I just...if you ever need anything, please, call me.”

Renee snagged Felicity by the shoulder and pulled her into another hug after allowing Felicity to put her number in Renee’s phone. “Good luck to you, too, girly. I hope this isn’t the only time we run into each other.”

After exiting the bathroom, both women went different directions--two very different problems on their minds. Felicity took her time to get back to Bruce, hoping the meandering pace would help her face calm the hell down. She’d always been a pretty obvious crier in general, her face would get all red and splotchy and her eyes made her look like she had just been hotboxing.

Once she got back to Bruce, though, she knew she wasn’t successful in her idea to give herself some time. With on glance up, Bruce’s eyes widened, his eyebrows furrowed, his jaw clenched, and he was surveying the room for a threat.

“I’m fine, Bruce,” Felicity started, sitting down next to him.

“You don’t look fine.” He answered in a stilted voice.

Felicity smiled to herself, the concern touching. Still, she couldn’t tell him that she’d just confessed her love for him to a stranger in the bathroom. Even if the stranger was exceptionally cool about it. “I just got stopped in the bathroom. This detective, her brother is in a wheelchair. She um...I didn’t realize.”

“Realize?”

“That my accident was my own. That my injury was my own, I guess.” Felicity ducked her head. “I forget, you know, that my story was about me. That people have been inspired by it. I’m still in the middle of fighting about… _everything_ that came with what happened...and I haven’t thought about the people who read my story and can identify with me. I was apparently a hashtag.”

“I thought you knew,” Bruce answered. “Felicity, I’ve always thought that you’ve known that you were a hero.”

“To you, sure, but you’re biased,” Felicity looked up at Bruce.

“Biased and honest,” He corrected. Without realizing it, he reached up to brush her hair out of her face and tuck the rebellious strands behind her ear. He let his hand rest on he back of her neck as he continued. “I honestly believe that you, Felicity Smoak, have always been a hero.”

Felicity looked at him searchingly. He wasn’t sure what she was searching for--sincerity, belief, conviction--but whatever it was, she must have found it, because she broke eye contact with a small, hopeful smile playing at her lips. “Thank you, Bruce.”

“Always.” Bruce leaned over and kissed the top of her head. His mind might be screaming at him, but it was silenced at the slight blush that appeared on Felicity’s cheeks. His heart’s speed picked up in his chest--so loud he was surprised that Felicity couldn’t hear it when she leaned into his chest. She closed her eyes and let out a sigh, but the kind of sigh that meant that she was happy. That was where she wanted to be.

After a minute of sitting like that, both processing new information, Felicity pulled away and stood in front of Bruce, parting his knees to stand closer than she usually did. She ran her fingers lightly up his forearms to hold his hands and tugged on them gently. “Come on, I want to see all of the local artists and maybe buy something.”

“Why do you need to buy something?” Bruce asked, feeling almost loopy on her affection and closeness and general hopefulness that Felicity had radiating off of her like sunshine. Spiked sunshine.

“I’m spending the day with you,” Felicity answered in a happy tone that had Bruce’s heart leaping into his throat. “Why wouldn’t I want to remember this?” Bruce graced her with a rare public yet genuine smile and stood. Felicity stepped back and released his hand after a beat of smiling at each other. “Don’t you want to remember everything we do together?”

“I always do,” Bruce answered on instinct. His brain, apparently, had been silenced since the way Felicity’s cheeks had colored at the kiss and now, here he was. Stuck acting on instinct, on his heart and his emotions, his love and the way Felicity was pumping him full of hope.

Felicity’s smile seemed like it was going to become a permanent feature, which had him dangerously curious about what it would feel like to press his lips against that smile. He wondered if she would be the type to giggle during kisses. She seemed like the type to. Bruce had never really been in a relationship before--much less with someone who trusted him enough to be affectionate outside of the bedroom or to be together just to be together, so he’d never had the chance to laugh in bed with a woman that he loved.

But there? Walking with Felicity as she reached out for his hand to hold and they looked at paintings and sculptures, laughing with her here was more satisfying than any night he’d ever spent with some stranger.

He squeezed her hand inside of hers when they were finished walking through the ‘cool’ part of the museum and she smiled softly up at him for a beat before returning the squeeze herself. They walked around the museum until her back was hurting too hard for her to cover up and then Bruce gave her a piggy back ride back to his car.

It was almost a date, Bruce thought to himself as he began to drive her back to the mansion. It was almost a date, but he wasn’t going to kiss her on the front porch. He wasn’t going to be able to hold her hand everyday. One day, she was going to meet the perfect person and they would take her away from him and he’d have to be happy for her because he wasn’t what she deserved.

_Isn’t that her choice?_

He wasn’t who she wanted.

_How do you know?_

She never asked.

_But she tried. Have you?_

No.

“You okay there?” Felicity asked as they rolled into the garage. “You look like you were thinking some really depressing thoughts.”

“I’m fine,” Bruce answered, turning of the car and stepping out of his seat. He was at Felicity’s door, ready to open it for her, when she opened it herself and stood to look up at him.

“I can open a car door, Bruce. My back feels better after a little break, like I told you it would.” Felicity teased. At Bruce’s non-reaction, she brought her hand up to gently cup Bruce’s jaw to make him look down a little bit more so that they were eye to eye. “Bruce?”

She was killing him. There was no way this wasn’t on purpose, he told himself. His heart wouldn’t stop pounding in his ears, demanding his attention as he looked down at Felicity, leaning against his car with his arms on either side of her and looking like the picture of calm.

He needed to ask her. He needed to tell her.

_Was this a date? Can I hold your hand for the rest of my life? Will you smile when I kiss you? Can I kiss you? How do you trust me so explicitly? Will you spend the rest of our lives laughing with me every time you think of something funny that happened the day before? Will you let me hold you? Can we still be friends if we break up?_

_I want to spend the rest of my life with you. I want to tell you everything that’s ever happened to me. I want to cherish you. I love you. I love you, I love you, I love you._

But there was a reason he wore a cowl and beat people up at night. Bruce Wayne was a man of action. When he was finally ready for the words, when he had the confidence and control necessary to hope for the best despite the odds, he felt his tongue basically turn into sand and the words get stuck in his throat.

So, he did the next best thing.

Leaning down slowly enough for Felicity to understand--telegraphing his intentions--Bruce pressed his lips against Felicity’s as gently as he could, his hands nearly shaking from the mix of anxiety and iron clad control running through his body.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯


	14. Dressed Like A Daydream

Bruce pulled away from Felicity after a beat of her not responding to find her making that stupid fucking adorable ‘processing’ face. Like a computer that had received too many commands, was running too many background programs, was overworking itself, Felicity looked to be overwhelmed.

Because Bruce had kissed her.

Which could either be a ridiculously great ego booster (like he needed it) and guarantee that he hadn’t been reading the situation wrong, or it could mean that too much was happening in her life right now for her to handle a relationship--which would be heartbreaking, but at this point, Bruce just _needed to know_.

“Um.” Felicity opened her mouth once, twice, three times, trying to find something to say. “Did what I think just happened just happen?”

“Depends,” Bruce answered, uncharacteristic nervousness making his heart feel like it was in his belly.

“Does that mean that you want to take it back?” She asked, voice airy and fragile as she finally looked up at Bruce with a guarded yet stubbornly hopefully expression that honestly left Bruce as good as putty in her damn hands. God help us if she ever realizes how much power she had over him.

“No.” Bruce shook his head resolutely. “No, I don’t, but I also don’t want you to feel pressured.”

“I don’t feel pressured by honesty, Bruce.” Felicity rolled her eyes, but still looked like her mind was working overtime to catch up with the situation

Bruce ticked the corner of his mouth upwards. “Then I honestly did just kiss you and I’d honestly like to do it again. That okay with you?”

“Yes.” Felicity nodded absentmindedly. “Just give me a minute to- to, you know, process. I never thought that I’d get this far.”

“This far?”

“I may or may not have been pining over you for seven years. I never thought that this would happen outside of my daydreams.”

Bruce held back the grin that was threatening to burst through at her confession that she didn’t even seem to process. “Am I better than you imagined?”

“Yeah,” Felicity blushed slightly and brought her hands up to rest on Bruce’s chest. She tilted her head to the side and looked up at him from underneath her eyelashes. “Maybe we should- should try it again. Just to be safe.”

Huffing out a laugh, Bruce captured Felicity’s waist in his hands and leaned down to kiss her again, this time with more conviction and a better response. This time when Bruce started to pull away, Felicity’s fingers curled into fists as she grabbed Bruce’s shirt and pulled him closer, going up onto the tips of her toes to meet him halfway.

And yeah, this? Felicity’s chest against his? Her clever little fingers holding him in place with a vice grip?

Bruce was pretty sure that this was the closest to heaven that he was ever going to get.

*

“Oh my god.” Sara stared at Felicity in awe.

“Don’t freak out.”

“Oh my god.”

“It wasn’t a big thing, Sara.”

“ _Oh my god_ , Felicity Smoak, you bitch!” Sara finally snapped back to herself. The two of them were in Felicity’s room, where Sara had been waiting for Felicity to help her get ready for Girl’s Night. However, when Felicity had practically floated into the room, Sara didn’t even need an explanation. “Tim and I had just organized a fucking plan and _now_ you two get your heads outta your asses?”

“Wait, what?”

“Did you kiss him, or did he kiss you? Was kissing all you did?” Sara waggled her eyebrows suggestively.

Felicity rolled her eyes and pushed her hair out of her face, her cheeks a bright red that she’d been trying to calm since Bruce had her up against his car. “We just- we kissed, okay?”

Sara squeed-- _fucking squeed_ \--and pulled Felicity into a tight hug. “You are now a woman, my sweet, sweet child!”

“That wasn’t my first kiss, Sara!” Felicity complained, halfheartedly trying to push the assassin off of her. “Besides, we didn’t really… _talk_ about it, so I don’t really know if anything is gonna come out of it--”

“Oh, _no_.” Sara pulled away and looked down at Felicity unhappily. “What happened?”

“He- he asked me to dinner, but we have--”

“Girls night can wait, hun!” Sara interrupted her. “That’s it, text Bruce to give you an hour to get ready, then you two are going on a nice date.”

“I’m not just going to order him around!” Felicity squawked as Sara darted into the closet and started pulling out outfits for the other blonde.

She held a dark red dress with a v-neck and a peplum to Felicity and let out a low whistle, “Why have I not seen you in this? It’s sexy as hell! And about ordering him around? That boy would fall all over himself to go out to dinner with you.”

Felicity huffed and put the dress back in the closet. “No, Sara! First of all, that dress is a size too small, and second of all--”

“Just because it shows off your ass doesn’t mean it’s too small, and I’ve seen some of your skirts, honey, this wouldn’t be too far off from that.”

“ _Second of all_ , I’m not going to demand that Bruce go to dinner with me, the man is busy!”

“God, I have to do everything myself,” Sara muttered, grabbing Felicity’s phone and dialing Bruce’s number.

_“Felicity?”_

“Nope, Sara. Meet Felicity for dinner in an hour. You good with that?” Sara rattled off, dodging Felicity’s attempts to grab the phone.

“Don’t let her bully you into submission!” Felicity yelled, earning suppressed laughter from the other end of the line.

 _“One hour. I’ll be ready.”_ Bruce confirmed.

Sara laughed triumphantly. “Thank you so much, moosey-woosey! I’ll have her ready by then!” Sara hung up and gave Felicity a smug grin. “We have an hour, cutie. Let’s make you irresistible.”

*

“This was not my idea,” Felicity announced as she walked into the entryway of the manor to find Bruce waiting for her, expensive suit on, hands in his pockets, and pacing in front of the door like he was determined to make a hole in the floor. “If you don’t want to--”

“I want to.” Bruce cut her off with a slight smile. She smiled back helplessly as she stopped, and Bruce finally had a moment to take in a Felicity that Sara had played dress up doll with. She’d ended up conceding to the dark red dress, a neckline that was just on this side of modest and peplum that did wonders for her (already wonderful) ass. The hemline stopped mid-thigh leaving more than enough room to show off her legs. “You look beautiful.”

Felicity huffed out a laugh and ducked her head, blonde curls falling into her face. “Shut up, you’ve seen me made up before.”

“Not for me.” Bruce pointed out.

“Oh, yes you have. You just didn’t know it.” She shook her head and gave him a small smile that almost stopped his heart.

He shook his head, and stepped forward, tilting his head down to share an intimate smile. “It doesn’t count if I didn’t know.”

“That doesn’t mean you didn’t appreciate it.” Felicity could feel her cheeks growing red under his gaze, but didn’t let it stop her.

“And I will continue to appreciate it,” Bruce’s eyes dropped down to Felicity’s neckline. “But now I know it’s for me and I can--”

“Get all caveman and possessive about it?”

Bruce shrugged and leaned further an inch to drop a chaste kiss on Felicity’s lips.

They moved away slowly and smiled up at each other. “Hey,” She breathed out, resting one hand on Bruce’s chest while she looked up at him from under her eyelashes.

“Hi.” He smiled. “Let’s go.”

*

Felicity expected it to be awkward. She’d expected a fancy restaurant and a stuffy atmosphere. She expected Bruce Wayne, the playboy billionaire. She expected stilted conversation, bitter wine, and food with too small portions. She expected to embarrass herself rambling and for Bruce to put up with it as kindly as possible. She expected that at best, there would be an odd seven to fifteen minutes of polite conversation.

Bruce, as always, exceeded expectations.

The restaurant wasn’t too fancy. The environment was homey and _warm_ and while it wasn’t exactly a diner or a mom and pop place, it also wasn’t what one would consider when they heard the words “date with Bruce Wayne”. Bruce wasn’t stiff or any version of Bruce that Felicity wasn’t used to. There was no hint of awkwardness between them.

They were just two people, who liked each other a lot, out on a date.

*

“I feel like a proud mama bear.” Sara grinned happily, arms crossed over her chest while Tim cackled next to her.

“I love this.” Tim cooed. “Do you know how awkward it was for Bruce to ask me to cover him tonight?”

“Please tell me you made it as bad as possible for him.”

“Of course.”

“I have a feeling,” Sara ruffled Tim’s hair. “That you and I are gonna be great friends.”

*

“So, how long have you wanted to do this?” Felicity asked as they stood in front of the door to her room, stalling the end of the night.

“Longer than I should probably admit to.” Bruce let one corner of his mouth lift in a cryptic smirk.

She rolled her eyes. “That’s no fair. I told you everything. I told you that I’ve been in love with you for seven years, and all I get in return is a mysterious, tall, dark, and handsome attitude?”

Bruce blinked at her and leaned down to kiss her gently, pushing Felicity’s hair behind her ear, burying his hand in her hair. “In love?”

“Well, yeah.” Felicity bit her bottom lip. “You think I’d risk anything if it was anything other than love?”

Bruce huffed out a laugh. “I’ve been gambling with you, Felicity. You count cards. You don’t risk anything at all.”

“Yet here I am.” She looked up at Bruce.

“Here you are.”

Felicity raised her eyebrows, nervousness welling up in her chest. “Yeah, Bruce. I’m not- I’m serious about this. I love you. What- what are you gonna do about it?”

“You’re the only person I know,” Bruce leaned his forehead against hers. “Who can make something that makes me the happiest person alive sound like a dare or a threat. Of course I love you, too.”

“Good.” Felicity pressed her lips together to stop a too-wide smile from taking over her face. From Bruce’s matching grin, she didn’t succeed. But...she was fine with it. Especially when she pulled away, and Bruce didn’t immediately back away. That, she was definitely fine with.

*

“Alright, so tell me all about last night,” Sara demanded while she and Felicity started their morning run.

“Oh, we had this idea for the Justice Society--” Felicity started excitedly, earning a groan from the other girl.

“I hate that you two probably spent the entire date talking about this.”

“Okay, no, but hear me out--”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ~~the next fucking time an entitled lil fuck orders me to update, y'all gon' get rickroll'd, got it?~~


	15. Something Bad

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> this is just a short little epilogue

Waking up with Felicity in his arms wasn’t actually something that Bruce was foreign to thanks to the tactile nature of their friendship, but was somehow so much better the morning after their first date. The morning after the day he’d finally been able to kiss her and hold her as much as he wanted. The morning after he’d first experienced what real happiness and romantic love was like.

He’d been right: Felicity was the type of woman to giggle in bed.

He wasn’t sure what had woken him up, but it hadn’t woken Felicity, so he counted that as a win. Somehow every time he looked at her, she was more beautiful--even in her sleep. Her mouth was hanging slightly open, freckles uncovered by makeup, a soft snore filled the otherwise quiet room. 

He loved her. He loved this woman with everything inside of him, and she loved him, too. She’d told him so. Accidentally, in the form of a ramble, but Bruce would never deign to ask for more. Not when the final result was this; Felicity asleep in his arms, turned on her side and curled into him. Bruce wasn’t exactly sure how her trust in him kept catching him off guard, but it did. He treasured every interaction that solidified or demonstrated that most precious trust.

“I can _feel_ you thinking,” Felicity groused into Bruce’s chest, earning a chuckle in the form of a ripple through his abdomen. “I was having such a nice dream and now I have to make sure you’re not thinking yourself off a cliff or something.”

“You think you’re so cute.” Bruce huffed, watching as Felicity pushed herself up to prop her chin on his chest.

“You think I’m cute, too.” Felicity lifted her eyebrow in challenge, a small smile playing on her lips. “What were you thinking about so loudly?”

He chuckled and raised his hand to push her hair out of her face. “You. This. Us.”

“Watch it or you’ll fill your word quota for the day,” She rolled her eyes and flicked his chest, the intimate atmosphere surrounding them as he feigned hurt at the offense. “Good thoughts or bad thoughts?”

“Good.” Bruce answered honestly. “Disbelieving, cautious, and very, very good.”

The blonde buried her face in her chest to hide from the pure emotions on his face. “Why do you have to say shit like that without any warning? God, you’re such a fucking sap.”

Bruce laughed, the two of them together. At last. As it should be.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alright, everybody.
> 
> Wowzers, that was quite a journey, eh?
> 
> Thank y'all so much for reading this, people who were with me from the beginning, people who have tagged along, and anyone that reads after this is over.
> 
> I know y'all wanted more (I'm not writing smut, guys, seriously) and there may be an opportunity for a sequel soonish, but How Did We End Up Like This? is as of now finished.
> 
> ~~so glad no one demanded an update that would've made me have to rickroll y'all, at least now we can end on a fluffy note.~~

**Author's Note:**

> Go follow me on social media:
> 
> [see wally_birb for pretty pictures](http://www.instagram.com/wally_birb/)
> 
> [see alpha-whale for snark in spades](http://www.alpha-whale.tumblr.com)


End file.
